The Amazing Adventures of a Socially Awkward Overthinker

so little time

I have an announcement of sorts.

Well, since I'm having to limit my time on the computer now, I won't be doing much updating anytime soon. I'll try to get in as much as I possibly can, but I don't think the next chapters of anything will be uploaded until the weekend or maybe Tuesday. I'm going to try to stick to a schedule. I'll write on Fridays and the weekend, then maybe on Tuesdays and Thursdays. And then whenever I can fit any other writing in. And I'll try to upload every...Saturday? how's that?

Why the sudden attempt at organization, you ask?

I'm starting a plan to change myself for the better. Scratch that, I'm not really changing...I'm getting rid of the parts of me that need to go. So, I've parted ways with my ''friend" Anxiety.  I'm going to slowly but surely face my fears and start focusing on who I really am, and what I should be doing. I'm not going to be happy 100% of the time, but I will be most of the time, and through doing this, I will look on things more positively even when I'm not completely happy.

And this won't be the stupid ''happiness" you experience from material items or guilty pleasures. This will be real, long term happiness.

I'll be focusing strictly on myself these next 6 months (don't worry, I'm not isolating myself from society, I'll still care about people. I'm just putting myself first for once) I'm going to actually go to school for the purpose of going to school...and that is to learn. Sure, I might not use everything at school, but you know what? That's not the point of it...I think it's that through school, we learn how to think for ourselves, how to solve problems, and deal with being disciplined, even if we don't want to. We learn to be responsible, how to process information and see if we can figure out what's really important and what's not. It's not about what you want to do or being happy all the time. It's about making the best of what's happening right now, and all the good stuff will come later.

But maybe I'm just crazy. I don't really care if people think I'm wrong. This works for me, and that's all that counts. And will I want to go back to my anxious days? Sure I will. It was simple to just sit back and fear everything. I'm going to have to work for this. And I want this enough to work as hard as I can, and I'm not expecting anything in return. I'm not expecting to get the best grades, or the most reads, or the ''perfect'' relationship after this. I'm doing this because I should.

I'm not telling you to do what I'm doing, it might not work for you...you might be perfectly happy with yourself. And that's wonderful. You might not be, and that's fine too, as long as you find what it is you should be doing.

Well, here's hoping that after six months, I'll have escaped myself and found who I'm supposed to be.

and now I shall go practice my piano piece that I really love playing. So, in the words of Jim Carrey, have a good mornoonevening.