One Moment

Twenty-Eight

Noel

Replacing a rotten plank of wood on the fence takes twenty minutes. Wiping away sweat, I run inside to wash-up. I've been working since seven this morning, sweating beneath the sun. The weather is above-average for May.

Taking a break to help Kinsley was nice. We chatted a little. She even cooked some toast, bacon, and eggs. She told me about meeting Daisy. Then we decided the tour could wait until after I finished my job. Now I just need to clean up a little.

I can't prevent myself from smiling as I wash my hands. Spending time with Kinsley is intriguing. She's a contraction I want to solve, and I can't prevent myself from giving up a good mystery. But Kinsley isn't the only factor making me happy. Being at home, I feel more like my old self. Things feel normal again. At some point, the normalcy will fade. Until then, I'll embrace these emotions.

I exit the small bathroom on the main floor. Cold drops of water run down my face, soaking my shirt. I enter the kitchen. The smell of coffee and burnt toast greets me. Gramps is reading the newspaper, leaning against the counter. His cowboy hat rests low on his head, shadowing his face.

"Saw you out there with Kinsley," Gramps says.

"Yeah," I shrug. A fruit bowl sits in the middle of the island. It's filled with apples, bananas, oranges, and grapefruit. I grab an apple, shining it on my shirt before taking a bite. "She went to the store this morning. Met Daisy and bought some groceries. Her stubbornness led her to that. She could've asked for food. Then we could've gone grocery shopping later"

After a sip of his steaming black coffee, Gramps says, "I think it's better she gets her own food."

I frown through a mouthful of apple. Last night, Kinsley knocked on the door, asking for towels. Introducing Gramps and Kinsley was inevitable. During their first exchange, it was obvious he didn't like her. Ever since meeting her, he's been diminutive with me. As if inviting Kinsley to stay on the farm was wrong.

From what I've gathered, he's not big on me and Kinsley spending time together. That aside, he was kind to her when he met her.

"That sounds selfish. But I guess you're right. Kinsley is very independent, so I don't know why I expected anything else."

Gramps shakes his head. "I'm not a fan of her staying here, Noel."

His words frustrate me. "She's not a stranger. I met her in September, we have the same classes. We're friends and study partners. I could understand if she were a stranger, Gramps, but she's not. I don't know why you're making such a big deal of this."

Gramps cocks an eyebrow. "What's her favourite colour?" he challenges.

I roll my eyes. "Kinsley isn't a small-talk girl. She likes conversations that mean something."

"You're avoiding the question."

"So what?" I ask, exasperated. I try to make it seem like his question hasn't bothered me, but it has. When you know someone, you normally know the minor details about them. With Kinsley, I know barely anything. I only know the stuff I've been able to pick out.

"So do you really know her?" Gramps asks.

I take another bite of the apple to avoid answering his question. Gran always told me, before she passed away, to never talk with food in my mouth. As I chew, I go through what I know about Kinsley. Which, isn't a lot. She's from Winnipeg. She's twenty-two and wants to become a vet. Kinsley is a mystery.

I swallow. "Her favourite hockey team is the Winnipeg Jets."

My response earns me an Are-you-kidding-me-you-little-shit? look.

I grin sheepishly, shrugging my shoulders. "Hey. At least I know something about her."

Gramps shakes his head. "Just be careful, Noel. She seems like the type of girl that will hurt you in the end."

Finishing the apple, I toss the core into the compost bin beneath the sink. Kinsley and I are meeting on the back porch. She's probably there already. As I walk, I think about Cole and Gramps. Gramps' words sounded similar to Cole's. The ones he spoke prior to leaving campus. They like to exchange notes. Keep tabs on my mental health.

They piss me off sometimes.

I shake my head, pushing my hair back, and settle my cowboy hat back on my head. I'm still hurting from the aftermath of the accident I caused. There is prominent pain in my shoulder. Guilt sticking to my gut. Pain. Pain is everywhere. Over the years, I've learned to embrace it. There's no escaping. I'm okay with that.

What I'm not okay with is Cole and Gramps monitoring my every move. Every emotions. At the beginning, they helped. Now? Their help isn't needed. I'm capable of living with it. Their support is kind. Being treated like a child irks me.

However, in some ways, I can see why they talk behind my back. Every time they try to confront me about properly dealing with the trauma, I shut them down. It contradicts my attitude.

Honestly, I wish I could escape my past. I wish I could forget it and never have to face the horrendous decision I made. That's why I shove the feelings away, why I pretend everything is okay.

Outside, Kinsley is waiting for me. "You ready?" I ask.

"Yes," she replies.

"Okay," I nod, gesturing to the pasture out back. "Let's go."

Kinsley steps ahead of me and walks down the stairs. For a moment, I stand on the back porch and watch her, thinking about what Gramps said.

Who cares if I don't know what Kinsley's favourite colour is right now? That's what getting to know each other is for. It's taking a lot longer than I expected, but that's how I know she's worth it.

Girls that are protective of their hearts are smart girls. When they lower their defences you know you've done something right.