Reaction || Malum ||

23

Michael's POV

Why is it that once one little thing clicks and things begin to work we expect the world to be perfect? It isn't perfect, nothing is perfect and the world can't change over night. People themselves cannot change over night. Calum was doing so good but like the weather, it changed. He had a furious relapse which didn't land him in the hospital like before, just an extra therapy session each week. Things between us are...tense. It's been a couple weeks since things fell into reverse and Calum seems so distant again.

I hate the pain that it causes me to feel Calum drifting away slowly. It seemed like everything became so good just to be spoiled again. It fucking sucks. Calum has been having terrible nightmares which means I have to hold the sobbing boy until he falls asleep. My mind and body have both become so exhausted as of late. And as if all of this wasn't enough, Calum and I have to hide our relationship while we are around my parents. Everything all at once is just taking a toll on my body.

"Mikey are you okay?" Julie's small voice snaps me from my thoughts and I stared down at the concerned little girl. Over the past couple weeks Julie and I have kept each other therapy while our loved ones are in their sessions which helps tremendously.

"I don't know." I sighed and stuck another puzzle piece in its correct spot. When I glanced back up, Julie's blue eyes were staring at me wide with concern.

"Are you sad?" She asked putting a piece of her own down.

"I don't know." I repeated with a shrug and ran my hands over my face.

"I don't like sad Mikey." She pouted and I nodded in agreement.

"I don't like him either." I sighed and placed a puzzle piece in its proper spot. Julie's tiny hands moved to do the same until we were one piece away from completing our puzzle.

"Is Calum sad?" She asked and my heart wrenched. There's no way Julie would be able to comprehend the level of sadness that consumed Calum.

"Yes." I said softly and Julie's eyes went sad.

"Why?" She asked. I couldn't explain to her the reasons Calum was so sad because even though the death of his parents were the main reason, I knew it wasn't the only thing.

"Because." I gave the young girl a generic answer but being a typical kid I knew what was coming next.

"Because why?" She tilted her head to the side and I could help but laugh at the way her tiny face was scrunched up.

"Why do you ask so many questions?" I teased sticking out my tongue to the shrugging girl. Julie instantly lifted my mood and over the past few weeks she's been a good break from reality.

"Thanks for being my friend Mikey." Julie smiled as she stuck down the final piece to the puzzle.

"Thank you for being my friend too Julie." I smiled and the tiny human wrapped her arms around my neck in a tight hug.

"Can we read?" She asked and grabbed up the book we've been practicing with. Every time we finished a puzzle Julie would grab the same book and we'd work on her reading skills.

"Sure." I smiled as we climbed up off the floor and each took a chair. I spread the book out on my lap and we got straight to work. Over the time we've been spending together Julie was actually getting better at reading. She helped me so much every day when I felt like my patience or sanity was wavering and she was pretty much a tiny stranger.

About halfway through the book I saw the black hood of Calum's sweatshirt as he exited the office. He slowly walked over to me without a word but turned for the door before I had time to climb up from the chair. I sighed and watched Calum walk outside then turned back to Julie. She tried to offer a smile but even she wasn't convinced.