I Lost Control

5. A Good Day

SUMMER
THREE YEARS LATER

"Landon Carter, get down here right now!" I yell up the grand staircase at the blonde haired five year old. My voice is full of frustration as I run a hand through my hair.

"What, mama?" He calls down as I hear the 'thump' of his feet jumping from the bed to the floor followed by his hurried footsteps.

"I need to ask you a question." He runs down the hall and down the stairs, one hand gripping the stairwell rail as he goes. I place my hands on my hips and raise an eyebrow at him. Once he gets to the bottom of the stairs and sees my expression, his gaze falls to the floor. He twiddles his fingers together as we stand in silence for a moment.

"Is this about the dining room rug?" I purse my lips tighter together and let out a huff.

"If you knew I was going to be mad, why didn't you tell me when it happened?" I take his hand in mine and lead him towards the dining room. We stand in front of the large red finger paint stain in silence. "Do you know how upset your dad is going to be?" I ask my son while squeezing his hand in mine.

"I'm sorry, mama. I didn't mean to." Tears start to well up in his porcelain blue eyes and the look on his face causes my heart strings to hurt.

"It's okay, accidents happen, but you have to tell me when they do, okay?" I crouch down so I'm at eye level with him and take both of his little hands in mine. Landon let's out a sniffle as one single tear slides down his cheek.

"Is daddy really going to be mad at me?" His bottom lip trembles and I force a smile.

"He's not going to be happy, but you know he loves you, right?" Landon nods as I reach up and brush a tear off his cheek with my thumb. "It's okay. Next time just tell me."

"I will." He mumbles out, his blue eyes shiny with moisture.

"Now, go get your toys in the living room cleaned up before he gets home. Then we will take a bath and eat dinner. How do tacos sound?"

"Yum!" He takes off running into the living room and I stand up, my frustration level high, but not at the small boy in the other room. I head into the kitchen to start dinner, praying with everything I have that Matt is in a good mood when he gets home from work.

Landon is Matt's pride and joy. Matt might not be his biological father, but that means nothing to the man I've committed myself to for the last three years. I have never seen my son so happy with anyone and I refuse to let that slip away. Even if that means I have to sacrifice some of my own happiness now and then.

Lost in my own thoughts, I walk to the refrigerator and pull out a half full bottle of my favorite wine. As I pour a glass, I think back to the way this morning was spent with Matt in the best mood in weeks. He'd woken me with kisses and I'd been so happy to see him smiling.

Falling in love with Matt was easy. He said and did all the right things. He knew how to make me laugh, smile, feel like I was on top of the world. The lavish gifts and grandiose trips were not the only things that turned me towards the hazel eyes man. I'd never met anyone before who could love so intensely and it was like a dream come true at first. Until it wasn't.

Life with Matt has not been the fairy tale romance I grew up wishing for. Did I believe that it would be when we met in the strip club that night? No. I didn't think it would turn out to be anything, to be honest, but here we are three years down the line. I just pictured things to be a little different. Matt seemed like one of the good ones. Wealthy, single, dependable, responsible, loving. That was the Matt I thought I was getting involved with.

I was wrong.

I'm pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of the garage door and I bite my bottom lip as I get the ingredients together for the meal. My eyes do a quick flick around to make sure the kitchen is clean enough to keep any irritation he may be feeling at bay. The kitchen door that leads to the garage swings open and in walks Matt. A smile spreads across his lips when he sees me at the stove, his dimples showing.

A good day. Thank god.

My heart flutters in my chest. A good day means I get to be with the man I fell in love with. The good days are rare, but they are so precious to me. Matt comes up behind me, his tattooed arms slip around my waist and his lips find my neck.

"How's my baby?" He whispers out as his lips move to my shoulder and his arms tighten, pulling me back against his chest. The food forgotten for a moment, I turn in his arms to press my front to his. My arms slip around his neck and I press a deep kiss to his lips, totally ignoring his question. He guides us over away from the stove and accepts my affection without hesitance.

"I missed you." I whisper into his ear, my eyes closed, my arms like a vice around his neck.

"Well it's a good thing I got off work early then, isn't it?" He teases me with a chuckle as he slips out of my grip and heads to the fridge. I watch him as he goes, admiring every bit of him.

Why can't it always be like this?

"Why don't we take Landon to see a movie tonight?" Matt suggests, his back still to me. I lean against the counter and cross my arms over my chest, an unconscious smile on my own lips. Matt turns to look at me, his eyebrow raised, a bottle of water in one hand.

"See something you like?"

"Always." I whisper out as I wink at him. He watches me for a moment, his gaze scanning me up and down and I push myself off the counter and make my way over to him.

Days like this are so few and far between I want to capitalize on every second. I lean up on my tip toes to kiss him again and this time he gets the point I'm trying to make. His hands wander down my body and grip my ass firmly as his lips move from mine to my cheek and down my neck. He walks us backwards and a giggle escapes my lips when we run into the refrigerator, knocking off a few magnets and photos in the process.

"So, movie?" Matt mumbles against my lips as he slips a hand up my shirt.

"I'd love to." All at once he pulls away from me and I frown.

"Check the food, I'm going to shower." He flashes me a wink before grabbing his bottled water and heading for the living room.

"I'll call Brian and see if he wants to bring the twins." Matt tells me as he pulls his phone out of his pocket.

"Awesome. Landon would like that." As I step back to the stove, Matt doubles back and grabs me by the neck before placing a kiss to my forehead. My eyes close and I wish this moment could last forever. I open my eyes a few seconds later, Matt in the other room on the phone while trying to calm a very excited Landon. A sigh escapes my lips as I take a wooden spoon out of the drawer to my right.