Brotherhood - Loki & Thor ♡

28. oculus

"Cast enough illusion and you risk forgetting what is real," said Frigga.

"Precisely," Loki replied.

///

Loki stood, fidgeting hands unconsciously, his legs slowly took him backward step by step, he knew he didn't deserve to be standing side by side with Thor, until he was in the shadow, until Thor was standing tall in front of him, in front of the throne. His smile brighter than the sun. Odin must be so proud of him. As always it was Thor who got all the praise from their father even though the victory they earned, Loki did most of the work. The God of Mischief was the one risking his life going undercover as one of the Dark Elves, the one who earned their trust and got their secret, and the one who led Asgard's soldiers to Svartalfheim, so Asgard attacked first before Dark Elves could. But Thor was the one decapitating Malekith, thus the God of Thunder got all the applause. Loki wanted to laugh; all Thor did was go in with dozens of guards protecting him. He just wielded the axe; the easiest job that happened to be the final bowl that finished it all.

Loki sighed, a part of him hated himself for these childish jealousy boiling in his stomach. What did he expect? That his father would look him in the eyes and praise him? Of course that wasn't going to happen, Loki should've known by now; Thor had always been the one to shine. He wondered if he were to walk out of the throne hall right now, would anyone even notice him? Probably not. All eyes were on Thor and Thor alone. Clearly they didn't need him anymore, his job was done.

Maybe some fresh air would count as a gift for himself after the blood and sweat he lost. So Loki walked out the door. Just as expected no one stopped him. No one cared.

~~~

Loki made it to his mother's garden. It was his getaway. To escape the world, the voices, everything. He looked up at the sky, it was lilac, four moons hiding behind the clouds yet it was still slightly visible. He closed his eyes, tried not to think of anything, of him never going to be equal to his brother, of him never going to be appreciated no matter how hard he tried. He just needed to stop thinking. At least the sounds of birds chirping and wind whooshing were enough music to his ears to distract his thought from the unpleasant truth about his life. Loki walked further down the path where above him; branches, from the trees his mother grown, woven together into a roof.

He lowered himself down on the same bench by the fountain, here he could feel water springing on his tunic. Thor thought it felt clammy, but Loki thought it was comforting to feel little droplet on his face after such a long day. He leaned his head backward and let his eyes drift shut. More than once he fell asleep here and woke when Frigga came to fetch him back inside the palace, you shouldn't be sleeping out here, she had said, even though the guards are around there are venomous animals, snakes and such, and it is cold. I wouldn't appreciate my child spending the entire night out in the cold. But perhaps Loki would sleep here for as long as his body needed rest, or until Frigga came. He was so tired and he didn't want to return to the palace just yet knowing they were all celebrating Thor. Maybe this time Frigga wouldn't come out for him, she was there, with her oldest son, maybe she didn't even notice Loki was gone.

Ten minutes had passed, Loki managed to put all the poisonous thoughts aside and focus only on his breathing. It was cold out here, but Loki never had any problem with cold weather, it was as if his skin embraced it, fed on it when the cold reached his heart. He didn't expect any company, but the sound of staggering footsteps approaching brought him out of his trance. When Loki opened his eyes he saw an old man falling on his knees in front of him. Out of instinct Loki shot up on his feet and rushed towards the stranger to see if he was okay. As a prince, a warrior, Loki knew how risky it was to run toward a stranger without being alerted or prepared for a sudden attack, but he was just an old man, though... and he was hurt.