Ryan came downstairs and the second I began talking about Jared, he took Chase from Sara's arms and kissed her lips. He then placed a hand on my shoulder before making a beeline for the stairs. "Good seeing you Carrie. I'm just gonna put him in his crib and let you ladies have some time alone," he called out.
"Thanks honey, I'll be up in a little while." Sara promised, tucking her feet under herself as she got comfy on the couch.
"Thanks. Goodnight Ry." I said, watching him disappear and shifted to face Sara. "How did you get so lucky? He's hot, sweet, funny, and amazing with the kids!"
She grinned, "I dunno, he just does something to me that nobody else can. It's crazy, I knew he was the one. What can I say, I'm deliriously happy?"
"And I'm happy for you Sara. You deserve it." I stared at my glass and took another sip. "Do you think it's possible to feel that way about two people?"
"Meaning Jared and Shannon?" She knew exactly where this was going. My eyes locked on hers and I didn't even have to respond. She saw the answer in the expression on my face. Sighing, she dropped her head back against the cushion and looked up at the ceiling. "I don't know. Carrie, I've never been in that situation before, so, I can't really advise you on this." She was quiet for a few seconds and then glanced back at me. "Tell me everything. I mean, I know the basics, but I want the whole story."
It took a while, nearly a half hour, but I spilled my guts to her, tearful at times. I didn't hold back either, my face turned a bright shade of red when I eventually got to the part of how we engaged in a threesome a few times. She sat there, hand over her mouth and eyes bulging wildly as she listened to the fiery details of my trips to Wyoming and Malibu. By the bitter end, I was a mess, sobbing like a kid who lost their best friend. "Jesus, I'm so sorry." To my surprise, she didn't throw in any, 'I told ya so's,' or, 'you should have known better's.' "I understand the betrayal you felt, but what I don't get, is why now all of a sudden you're cool, talking to him. Shannon still fucked you over. Carrie, a cheater is a cheater, no matter what, and I'm not just saying this because it's Shannon and I hate his guts. If Ryan ever does cheat on me, feel free to let him have it, and me too if I take him back!"
"I did let Shannon have it, didn't you hear me when I told you what happened while I was gone? After what took place on the bus, I was furious with him. I wasn't nice Sara." I took the Kleenex from her hand and wiped my eyes.
"Yeah, but I also heard you say that you stayed up all night and played video games with him, rather than sleep in a bunk with your boyfriend. Not to mention all of these flirty texts." She picked up my phone, swiping her finger across the screen and scrolled through the messages, again. She then tossed it back down on the couch. "These unresolved feelings you have for him are gonna come back and bite you in the ass. Mark my words, Carrie. You have to stop talking to him."
I shrugged it off. "The texts aren't flirty! They're friendly!"
"You were going to go to dinner with him! Would it have even ended there, or in his bed? More importantly, would you have even told Jared?" I didn't know what I would have done in that position. If he tried to kiss me, would I have the ability to walk away? Her eyes narrowed, waiting for me to respond. When I didn't she put her glass down and her expression softened. "Look, I just feel like you need to take some time for yourself and decide what it is that you really want. Just remember that open relationships never last. I don't want to sit back and watch you get hurt any more than you already have been."
Another text came through and I grabbed the phone, staring at Shannon's message.
'Shit. I'm sorry Carrie. I didn't mean to insinuate that it's your fault. I know that I have only myself to blame for what went down between us.'
Sara looked at me questioning what it was about. "He apologized for the last message."
She took the phone from my hand and reread the previous text. "Don't respond. If you do, it's just going to continue and eventually turn from emotional to sexual. I can see it happening, and he has to know that you aren't completely over him. It would be so easy for him to manipulate the situation."
"I don't think it's like that. Shannon isn't a manipulative person. He's trying to do what I asked for, he's trying to be my friend." I leaned forward, picking up my glass, taking another sip.
"Right now." Sara ran her fingers through her hair. "At some point he will get the courage to take it to the next level. He's a guy, it's what they do! This is why I'm telling you to end it now. You're playing with fire here babe. Look, maybe you should talk to your man about this. Be honest with Jared, confide in him. He will definitely appreciate it, and in the end, it will probably bring the two of you even closer."
"God, why do I feel guilty? You almost make it sound like I'm cheating. I'm so not the cheating type." The tears were flowing again, harder this time.
"I didn't say that! You're not a cheater, you're human. Jared will understand. Give him a chance. And don't misunderstand me, Jared is the lesser of the two evils, that's all. I'm not a cheerleader for him."
Leaning forward, I wrapped my arms around my best friend. When I arrived, I was sure she was going to be angry with me for missing Chase's birth or even worse, for being too busy to talk lately. She wasn't. She did exactly what I needed, she listened and gave me what she considered to be the best advice.
"I know you don't like him." She just sighed, probably not wanting to upset me anymore that I already was. "But maybe he will dump me if I tell him what's going on."
"Never gonna happen. I've seen the way he looks at you Carrie."
"Maybe you're right."
"Ugh, of course I am. Remember Care, honesty is better than a knife in the back." My heart clenched at the thought of hurting Jared.
"I'll talk to Jared. Thank you so much for being here for me tonight. I miss you so much."
"Then quit avoiding me you slut!" I loved this bitch so much. Our playful insults were back and I swore that I'd start making more time for our friendship.
"It's late, I gotta go. I have an appointment first thing and Sondra called for another project. I should call a cab."
"NO! I'll take you." She stood, picking up the two glasses and brought them to the kitchen while I slipped my shoes back on. "Sondra's nice, but Jesus, talk about diarrhea of the mouth." Sara knew Sondra through a family friend.
"Really! And she wants me, Josh let me know that she specifically asked for me."
"Well, yeah, she'd eat him alive." She put on the pair of slippers next to the couch and grabbed her keys, while I picked up my bag. She locked the door behind us and I followed her to the car, tossing my bag into the back seat. The ten minute drive was filled with lighter, much happier conversation. We talked about the kids.
When the car came to a stop, I sat there for a few seconds unbuckling my seat belt and digging my keys out of my purse. "Sorry I monopolized the conversation tonight. I just really needed to talk to someone about all of this."
"It's all good. We both still have issues, mine just changed from guy problems to parenting problems." She chuckled. "The dishwasher is broken and Savannah chewed through a glow stick the other day. I had to call poison control. Lots of fun. So see, your problems are very different than mine. Now that you're back, come by for lunch Friday. The girls will be at school and it will just be Chase and me."
"I will. Love you."
"Love you too." I got out and opened the back door, picking up my suitcase and lugging it into the hallway of my apartment complex. I unlocked my front door and turned on the light inside my empty apartment. It was times like this I felt so alone. I shut the door and locked it. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I took a deep breath before dialing Jared's number and plopped down on the couch. His cheerful voice did nothing for my somber mood. "Hey baby, I was hoping you'd call."
