Fuck, Shannon smelled so good and I stayed silent for a few seconds, staring at how sweet and genuine he appeared. He was leaning down on his elbows, watching me intently. It was unbelievable how completely oblivious he seemed to be at just how much his presence affected me. There was no sign of the cocky, seductive Shannon I knew so well, but I wasn't stupid, I knew deep down that if he made a move on me, I'd probably cave. I really did miss him, not just being with him romantically, but I missed his sweetness and the way he always had to have the last word. I missed how funny he can be and how if I pissed him off, he had no problem letting me know it. Most of all, I missed Shannon's friendship. While I was able to be around him when visiting Jared on the road, the urge to have him pin and fuck me against the nearest surface, has never completely faded.
Adding the cheddar to the Mac and cheese, I mulled over his words as my emotions swirled violently. Again, I had that little angel on one shoulder, reminding me of how I shouldn't feel this way about my boyfriends brother, but the devil sitting on the other only chuckled, setting off a wave of memories from when I was pinned beneath Shannon on the floor in front of the fireplace in Wyoming. God, I wanted to tell them both to shut the fuck up!
There was only one way to handle the situation. I needed Shannon to call Jared and let him know that he was here. If Jared knew it and was fine with it, given our steamy past, then maybe I could relax and accept the friendship he's offering. An occasional text was one thing, but hanging out alone together was another, and I refuse to do it behind Jared's back.
When I needed him the most, Jared had been there for me and I refused to do anything that would intentionally ruin what we have. I poured a little more almond milk into the pot, stirring slowly and glancing over at the handsome man watching my every move. "You want to stay, as a friend?"
"Yeah," he looked a little insulted, like he couldn't believe I actually questioned his intentions. "I know things have been strained between us, but I would never use your emotions to try and seduce you. I've done a lot of things that I regret, but I'm not a heartless asshole."
"I know you're not." Taking a deep breath, I folded my arms across my chest. My eyes met his brilliant hazel ones and I narrowed my. I could really use a friend right now. My lips trembled and I couldn't stop my eyes from welling up, but I managed to hold it back. "Okay then, you can stay on one condition. You have to call Jared and let him know that you're here." Shaking my head, I looked away. "It's not right for you to be here without him knowing. I won't hurt him by keeping secrets like that."
Shannon stood up straight, pulling his phone out and dialing his brother, hitting the speaker button so I could listen in. Jared answered on the third ring. "What's up, Shan?" There it was. That sexy voice that I missed so much. He sounded exhausted and I wanted to tell him how much I missed him. How badly I needed him.
Shannon looked confident as he spoke." Hey. So, you remember when you told me about what happened to Carrie?"
"Yeah." Jared's single word answers didn't help to determine his mood at all.
"And I told you that I'd check in on her." Shannon shifted, staring right at me.
"Okay."
"So, I'm at her apartment right now." There was dead silence on the other end of the call and I wondered what Jared was thinking. I chewed the inside of my cheek, trying to decipher his feelings, but it was impossible. I felt stupid, Jared was so unreadable when he was standing right in front of me, so how could I possibly figure this out just by hearing his voice? All those years of acting only made him better at showing people only what he wanted them to see. He could be angry as hell on the inside, but all you'd see was cool as a cucumber on the outside.
