This Is (Unfortunately)ME

5/25/2019

I feel better but so unsatisfied. I have so much shit to say and explain for why I couldn't take it anymore, but I don't think I'll ever get the chance to say any of if to you. I wanna tell it all but I can't do that since it's over now. Still, that doesn't take away from the fact that I feel so much better. I'm happy and not wanting to cry all the time anymore. I stopped feeling like a last resort and burden now that you're gone.

I still love you sure, but that will melt away sooner or later. This is one of those times where I'm grateful for my fucked up memory. It'll help me forget everything but your name.

I spent the whole duration feeling like I would regret ending things. Now that its over, I know that I was wrong. I feel nothing. No bad feelings. No regret. I don't even miss you that much.

I thought I would wanna try to fix it one last time, but nope. There is no point because we all know it won't help anything. It's best that I just continue to move on.

Soon we'll both have a hard time remembering each other's faces. We'll have to stop and think about where we recognize each other's names from. We won't feel anything when the other is mentioned. I'm looking forward to it.

I wanted to be mad so bad, but I was way last all that. I felt like there wasn't really even a change. Not to take away from you. You were great and I think that even now. We were great just not with each other. I tried though, but I had to give up. I didn't wanna keep working on sonething that was slowly killing me.

I'm trying to slowly erase everything that involves you. I don't want to be around any part of you unless it is necessary really. But we both know that if you need me I'll be there. I wouldn't be me if I wasn't. I don't think that time will ever come though. You're strong and you have options. I wouldn't be the one you come to.