Ever since I found out that my dad hated me because he blamed me for my mom's death, he started abusing me. He would wake me up in the middle of the night, when he got home, with a knife to my throat, threatening me; if I didn't fix him something to eat, then he would kill me. There were sometimes that I just laid there, waiting for him to kill me; it would've been better than going through my life with his threats. He never actually tried to kill me though. I think it's just because he knows that he couldn't survive if I wasn't there. He wouldn't be able to make his own food, and he wouldn't even be able to live.
I was more of his slave than his daughter, and anytime one of his 'buddies' came over, he would disown me. He would deny every fact that I was his daughter. To all of his drinking buddies, I was his maid. I was even their maid when they decided to stay the night or when they came over. I was never looked to as an equal by any of those people.
One night, when his friends were over, I was sitting in my room, planning on escaping, but it didn't go too well. I had everything I thought I needed put together in a blanket that I tied up. I was just eight at the time, so I didn't think about using a backpack. When I tried to pick it up, I found out that it was too heavy. So I stayed, with much regret now. Now I know that I should have escaped when I had the chance, even if I didn't have much money or food with me.
Four years after that, when I was twelve, my dad came home drunk, as usual, but he brought a new friend home that he had met that night at the bar. They both came home, and as usual, my dad woke me up, demanding me to fix him something to eat. Reluctantly, I got out of bed, and went to the kitchen. His new friend was standing in the kitchen, almost passed out on the counter. I just sighed, and walked over to the refrigerator. I started getting things out for a ham sandwich, and I started fixing his sandwich. I kept feeling that guy's eyes staring at me. I looked up at him once, but it almost looked like he was asleep, so I didn't think much of it. I finished up, and started putting everything back in the refrigerator. I took the sandwich to my dad, who ended up being asleep by the time I was finished. I set the plate with the sandwich on it down on his nightstand. I went back into my room, and shut the door, so I could go back to sleep. After a few minutes of lying in bed, not able to go back to sleep, I started hearing footsteps walking down the hall. I just figured that it was my dad going to the bathroom or something, but after a few seconds, my door started opening. I sat up in bed, figuring that it was my dad, just coming to get me to do something else for him. "Dad, what do you need now?" I asked.
There was no reply from the person, except for my door shutting.
"Dad?" I asked again.
There was still no reply. "I guess he went back out," I though, and laid back down, when I heard someone walking around. I sat back up, and got out of bed. "What do you want, Dad?" I said a little irritated.
"I want..." a scruffy voice started.
"You're not my dad! Get out!" I yelled, as I went to kick the drunken guy my dad brought home in the shin, but ended up missing and falling backwards. "Ouch..." I muttered, and rubbed my back in pain.
"...you," the guy finished.
I looked up at him in fright, and stood up as quickly as I could. I tried to get around him to get out of my room, but he just kept getting in my way. He grabbed my arms, and threw me back onto my bed. He slowly started coming towards me, and I started crying. This guy looked like he was in his mid-thirties, and I wasn't about to let him rape me. I screamed as loud as I could, hoping one of the neighbors would hear me. My dad came stumbling into my room, and came over to my bed, and slapped me across the face. Even more tears came running down my cheeks, knowing that I had to get out of here. My dad mumbled, "Shut up! I dont want to hear anything out of you!" He stumbled back out of my room, and slammed the door shut.
I mumbled a little scream under my breath, and started crawling towards the other side of my room, away from the drunken guy. "Where are you going?" he said, as he came closer towards me.
