It's A Long Ride Home, I'm Afraid. {Camren} ✔️

~{1}~

A/N: hey y'all! For those who are coming back to reread this story, I'm currently working on editing chapters (update again: I've finished). I haven't edited this story since 2019, and as someone who's improved a lot in their writing I felt it was finally time to fix up some things. As always, thank you for reading!

~

How beautiful is the world, would you say?

How does one answer that question exactly?

Would you say that it's got nice colors, or that nature is fascinating?

Or would you say that it really isn't all that beautiful, and it's just full of evil people and evil things?

Me personally, when I look at the Earth, I see something truly extraordinary. Inspiring maybe. If you really think about it, this planet has gone through more hardships than any of us in this entire world have.

It's been struck by a meteor, sat through entire wars; there's pollution, deterioration, and of course, the nonchalant yet gradual destruction carried out by the human race each and every day.

I see these things, and then I ask myself another question.

How is something able to be so strong, and be there for people time and time again knowing that it'll always be giving, but never getting?

And then I relate it to myself.

I'm not strong or beautiful like the planet earth, in fact I'm much weaker.

But what I can say for certain is that I can always give to people, yet I will never receive what I truly desire in life.

A cure.

Having sickle cell anemia is everything but gratifying. You hear so many stories about people wanting to die, or joking about not wanting to have to live long because it might be a chore.

It's simple for me. I don't want to die. But right now, I don't really have a choice.

Some days I make myself feel better about the impending doom of me passing away in my forties by realizing that, when I'm in the ground, I'll at least become a part of the Earth.

Will I be strong and beautiful then?

There actually is a cure to this disease, more scientifically known as a bone marrow transplant.

The only problem is that it can cost anywhere from $100,000 to $300,000, and I'm horrible at saving money. I'd never be able to put that much away anyways, it's not like I make that kind of money.

And besides, the procedure is extremely dangerous. For example, you'd be taking a huge risk even if you get the transplant as early as the age of sixteen, and it's also difficult to find a donor.

Death can occur very easily during a bone marrow transplant.

I'm currently twenty two years old, which already makes surviving the repercussions of a bone marrow transplant harder. I'm out of college with a degree in music, but I still haven't found myself the right kind of job.

I'm living off of money my dad sends me, basically. It's not too much, but it's enough for me to at least have a meal a day and still be able to pay rent.

My dad lives with my little sister in Miami, Florida. I'm all the way up here in New York City living a truly glamorous life.

I remember him telling me after my mother died to pursue what I truly wanted in life, and at that time it was to live in the city and enjoy the opportunities there.