-not edited-
Yoongi sat on the chair in the waiting area. His hands covering his face, his eyes shut.
Please be alright, he pleads.
Tears were welling up in his eyes but he could not let they flow, he had to be strong for others.
His other manager who had arrived moments ago sat beside the rapper, patting his shoulder in reassurance.
"It's going to be okay."
It is going to be okay.
The words he kept hearing from various people who did not know themselves if things will be okay, if Namjoon will be okay. Then why did they say the words, to give him false hope?
"Please hyung don't say something you are not sure about yourself," Yoongi whispered in a broken voice just barely over a whisper, turning to the manager who worriedly looked at him.
"You are just giving me false hope and if I believe you now and god forbid if something goes wrong and Namjoon is no longer alive, I really won't be able to take it. It's better if I think of the worse now only, maybe then the bad news won't break me so much."
The Manager opened his mouth to speak but was cut off with others members rushing in with Sejin behind him. He got up giving place to the members, walking towards Sejin discussing about the situation.
"Hyung, How is Namjoon?" Hoseok asked.
"They are treating him now so I have no information at the moment," Yoongi answered.
All the members sat, all in deep thought. They all wanted to refuse the reality, praying that it was all a nightmare. Though, one by one they all experienced a moment of epiphany and realized that this was reality, that Namjoon had tried to commit suicide. Eventually, getting over the shock state causing them to burst in tears when they come to terms what was happening.
Seokjin sensed how Yoongi tried being strong, silently wiping tears that occasionally left his eyes pretending as if he was not crying.
He asked Hoseok to switch places and sat beside Yoongi.
"Yoongi, you don't need to act strong, it's okay to cry. Everybody is hurting right now, it's perfectly fine to cry, keeping your emotions inside hidden will only hurt you more. Just let it all out," Seokjin whispered in the younger's ear when he pulled him into a hug, tears still freely cascading down his cheeks.
Yoongi really needed to hear those words.
A loud sob escaped the younger's mouth, he fisted Seokjin's shirt as the dam broke in his eyes, tears flooding out of his eyes.
Hearing painful sobs of the younger caused the older to cry harder too, hugging Yoongi close to himself.
They all needed each other desperately, only they could understand each other's pain, sorrow and guilt.
Taehyung looked blankly at the pale boring walls. Everything happened too fast, his brain still unable to function.
Was this my fault?
Why did all the people in his life seem to leave him one by one these past months? First his grandma who he loved dearly, then his model best friend who had committed suicide and now Namjoon.
Was being a part of their lives the cause of their deaths? Was this God's way of punishing him for what he might have done wrong? If so what was he being punished for? Who was going to be the next one to leave him?
YOU ARE READING
Voices // Namjoon x BTS
FanfictionIn which members are oblivious to the fact that Namjoon is dying inside a little more each day. Started: 19/12/18 Ended: ? Trigger warning: self-harm self-hate mentions of suicide insomnia eating disorder little cursing