something to do (Pavel Chekov)

13

The next few days prove to be hard. Eadie is still in pain and Pavel feels helpless only being able to watch. She asks him to sing and he does, singing anything that comes to his mind and not caring if his voice sounds far less than good. After a little while she takes his hands and pulls him to his feet. She starts dancing with him slowly and sings softly. She sings a love song and pretends like their life is a little easier than it is. She rests her head on his chest and her eyes start to fill with tears. It happens more and more often now. She can't always pin why.

Pavel has trouble sleeping and even with Eadie's fingers in his hair. Eadie eventually falls asleep with her hand still in his hair and he's left to his thoughts, staring up at the ceiling. When he's alone he spends more time thinking about what will happen to them. He worries about the future. He worries about losing her, about having to watch her suffer. His hands are resting on his stomach and he thinks about their life after the cell. His head starts swirling and he thinks about what would happen if they left the cell and she didn't need him company anymore. He thinks it would break him. After spending so long in those four walls, he needs to be needed. He looks to Eadie and thinks about how much he needs her. He focuses on her hand in his hair before he finally brings himself to sleep.

Eadie is awake and stays still while Pavel sleeps in her lap. She knows he's had trouble lately. She moves her fingers slowly in the hopes it brings him sweet dreams. She wonders if she can bring him to dance again and part of her knows he'd dance even if he didn't want to. It stops mattering at some point. Wanting, not wanting. It fades into a blurred feeling of either doing or not doing something. At the point they're at, doing anything is better than doing nothing.

Pavel does dance with Eadie. They stay close and he smiles a little as spins her around. He hums a little and they take a seat when they get tired. He asks if she's feeling alright and she nods. Her stomach is a little sore but otherwise she's okay. She asks if he's feeling okay and he shrugs.

"Okay, not okay. I don't know. Maybe I'm just tired. I can't sleep and I don't know why."

"Have you always had troubles sleeping?"

"It's come and gone throughout my life. It got really bad after everything that happened with my uncle. I couldn't sleep properly for months. I got over it eventually. I was using a lavender paste and listening to all sorts of sleep music. I don't exactly have that luxury here. Having your hand in my hair makes a lot of difference. I appreciate that. It's the only thing that can relax me in this damn cell."

"It's hard being on edge constantly. We've been on edge ever since we got here. Dreaming about the outside seems to relax me a little. I can't wait to teach you to ride a bike."

He smiles at the thought and she stretches herself out on the bench. She sings to him softly and he listens, telling himself that one day, things will be easier.

Pavel has an idea for something else they can do when they wake up and Eadie isn't sure whether he's kidding or not. He removes his shoe and throws it to her. She catches it and raises an eyebrow at him.

"You're only allowed to use one hand," he smiles, taking a few steps back so there's a little more space between them. She throws it back to him and he promptly drops it, making her laugh a little. He throws it back to her and she catches it, throwing it back and laughing as he drops it again.

"Sports were never a strong point of mine," he mutters, picking his shoe up off the ground.

"Except running, right? You told me you used to run all the time at the academy. Did you stop when you were on a Starship?"

"It cleared my head. I felt like I had everything figured out when I started navigating so I didn't really need to run so much anymore. I did it for fun sometimes or if I ever had trouble sleeping I'd just run until I thought I'd collapse then crawl into bed. It always felt better waking up when I'd do that."

"I can't tell if that's a good or bad habit."

"Nor could I."

(Author's Note)

Today, I bought a croissant at the markets purely because the boy selling them was adorable and had brown curly hair. He was so polite and I'm 100% going again next week to buy another croissant and try and chat to him. Stay tuned fellas.