Till The End

Chapter 11 - Growing Closeness

As we take a bite of our chicken sandwich, Emi and Jia joins us with their milkshakes on their hands. The circle is now complete. Emi asks Jia about Woohyun. "Leave it guys. I don't wanna think of it anymore. The matter is over for me. He doesn't care for me at all. He says that he doesn't love me anymore , actually I think he never loved me at the first place. It was just his lust or mere infatuation and you know they don't last long. So let's not drag the matter. It's over for me", Jia says, she's not sounding depressed anymore. Jia's someone I only knew to cry in pretty things like this, I'm surprised to know this side of hers. This demography of love, infatuation is out of my understanding but I'm happy that she's over it now. Also I guess, we might know a person inside out but not wholly. There's a strong side hidden behind the pretty tears of every person. And seeing Jia, I can't agree more.

 Percepting  the whole situation Winnie advises Jia, "Don't do hurry to be in a relationship. We mostly make mistakes in differentiating between love and infatuation. It happens in many cases that we love the person but this is not the same with him. So be careful next time and take time to take any decision." There's a certain truth behind her words. The mistake most make is They hurry things. Hearing her I feel like I got my answers, Dad never loved Mom, it was just his lust or infatuation and Mom just failed to realize that. How weird it is! Two different person suddenly become so close in a moment and then... in the next moment, all's over. Love and Lust; the two words starting with the same letter L until the next three words differentiate them. Indeed a really thin difference lies between the both but if one fails to realize it, then it leaves the thickest impact in our life. This is just as simple as that yet in all these years I failed to realize this. I don't know why, I feel like breaking the barriers in my mind regarding Love. I feel there's more to it, something I never noticed. There's a deep emotion hidden behind it, which all on a sudden I can feel today. But there's one question to which I have no answer. What's the reason behind this change in me, my stereotypical thoughts about love, about relations, why my demography for all these is changing all on a sudden?

"It's Time for next lecture", Emi reminds us and we quickly finish the remaining part of our food. It's Economy class and Mrs.Kate distributes the papers of our previous mock test. I score 43 out of 50 though I expected much less than this. I look aside to face Jim to ask his marks but right then Winnie turns back at him to ask him. Jim replies, "47" without facing her. Woww! He scored really good. I wanna congratulate him and as I'm about to do so, Winnie does before I can, "Congrats. I knew you will get the highest mark." Jim doesn't react to her. I can't deny the fact that I'm not feeling good. I don't know why I wanted to congratulate him first. This is a strange feeling! I try to shake off my thought when he, to my surprise asks me my marks. "43", I reply with a smile.

"You scored great", he says putting on the same smile.

"No, you scored the highest. Congratulations", I finally wish him to which his eyes glitters up. Did they just? "Thanks", he chuckle and all on a sudden my ruffle mood just cheers up in a jiffy. Though Winnie saw us talking and then she turns front to her seat.

.  .  .

It's evening and I'm lying on my bed when I decide to log into my facebook and then what pops up just lights up my entire mood. Jim accepted my friend request and I am like ...yayyyyyyy. But wait wait Eila.. why are you so excited, I give a slight slap on my head. It's normal that he accepted my friend request, I murmur unto myself though I am not able to control my excitement. I decide to text him once and eventually sent *Hi*

 He's online but he didn't see my message yet. I can't explain the skittishness mixed with excitement running down my nerves right now. I can't hold this suspense anymore. What'll he think after seeing my message? Will he think I am getting too much after him or will he be happy? God! Why am I feeling like this! This is a sort of feeling I never felt before. After a suspense of long 5 minutes he finally replied seeing my text *Hello* 
Actual 5 minutes is not a long time but for the first time, this 5 minutes turned out to be the longest duration of suspense in my life. And did I mention my face when his text popped up? Well, that's something you can figure out only when you'll see my blushing face lined up with nervousness and excitement at the same time. I can't just believe to my eyes that Jim , seriously Jim the Robo replied my message because he doesn't seem to be of that type boys talking to girls or even chatting with them. I am confused what to say further. But finally decided to go for some usual conversation.