Till The End

Chapter 68 - Right or Wrong?

"You haven't eaten anything since last night. Get up and have something", Emi constantly says but right now I don't want to.

"Later", I repeat without facing her.

"I am not listening to you anymore. Get up". I finally listen to her and head to the washroom to wash my face since my eyes are whole red and swollen. I tried but still I couldn't stop crying. I don't wanna go to college today. I will stay at home. After I get out I tell Emi about my decision of not going to college today. I'm glad she doesn't question further. 

Jim's POV :

I enter our class when Keith comes near, "Why didn't you come yesterday?"

"I was just not feeling good", I think they don't know yet.

"You don't have to act. We all know you broke up with Eila. But why man?" He sounds depressed. I broke up with her? Well, I guess what we are facing right now actually means breaking up. I don't know why this word is painful. The thought that we broke up is hurting me. 

"Leave it please", I try to avoid when my eyes fall on Winnie. She smiles facing me and I take my eyes away. I don't wanna see her. I look around to see if Eila's here or not. But she's nowhere. After a while I see Emi entering and wait for Eila to come inside but she doesn't. She didn't come today! This thing again hurts. I wonder how she must be feeling right now. I know she's hurt but I can't help it. I can't do anything or maybe I don't want to do anything. It feels I am bound by an unknown string, something which is too powerful to let go of. I go to our usual bench and see our conversations on the table which for a while makes me feel nothing's changed, everything's normal, soon she'll come and hug me from back. But that's just a illusion which is never gonna happen again. I can never forget what happened to my dad and I can never forgive. 

Eila's POV :

I hear a knock on the door and turn to see it's Sarah with Emi. "Hey", I greet upon getting up from the couch as they come near.

"How are you?" Sarah hugs me which I give back. 

"As usual". A void smile on my face. "So, how come you're here today?" I think I know the reason.

"You didn't come to college and I wanted to meet you. That's why", she gives a slight lift to her shoulders. I force a smile. We three then sit comfortably on my bed when Sarah and Emi tells about what all happened in college today, also there's a good new that Miss. Henry is getting married. "Poor Sam", I laugh. He always had a crush on her.

"Indeed. Remember the truth and dare? Sam flirted with her", as Sarah reminds we three again laugh at our fullest but the next moment I remember of Jim. We both were asked if we were virgin or not. Then that snow storm and the night.. we lost our virginity. There is pleasure yet pain with this thought. My every single memory is linked to him and in no way I can get rid of this.

"You and Jim were also asked the same quest..", Sarah stops in midway. "I'm sorry".

"It's okay", I nod facing her with a forced smile on my face.

"But come on. Be normal. It's not been long since you both have been together, you both fell just in few days. So, you can get over this easily", she exclaims but she's wrong. 

I look into her eyes before saying, "Love never takes time. It's choosing the person who is perfect for you takes time."

She doesn't say anything further and thus I continue with my eyes focused on my tangled fingers over each other which is again deluging me in his thoughts, "We didn't know if we were perfect for each other or what, we both just fell in love. This can happen even in a split second and the pain of separation stays for a lifetime. It's unending." And I'm not crying. I'm proud of becoming strong in each moment.

After staring at me for few moments Sarah finally says, "Won't you try talking to him again?"

"No", I reply in a void voice, "I don't wanna make things difficult from him anymore. It's not his fault. It's our fate and we can't change what's written." I let out a breathe. "If we are destined then we will meet again".

Jim's POV :

I'm not feeling good. I bring my phone to dial Eila's number but I stop. I don't call her. I want to but I don't. I wonder what this situation is! Even the right seems wrong and the wrong seems right. I love her yet I don't want her or maybe I do. I don't know. My own mind has become the most toughest of machineries which is now fully out of my control. I am unable to control this unnecessary buzzing and humming which is breaking me in two pieces. Right now all I want is to see her once, hear her once but I can't. I hope she comes tomorrow.

I reached college and I'm about to enter the classroom. I hope she's present today. I know I won't be able to face, I won't be able to talk to her yet I want her to be present, in front of my eyes. I look around and my mind is getting restless as I'm unable to find her anywhere. Emi's here but not Eila. This means she didn't come even today. The pain in my heart is increasing as if I'm losing a part of mine. To be precise not just a part but the whole Me. Why things can never be simple? Why our past had to be linked? Why can't I come to any conclusion? Everything is messed up along with me. I don't know how to make things right. I have no idea if I doing it right or not but I love her.

(Well, I really got emotional writing these break up chapters. What about u? Do let me know.
There's another next. Check it.)