Till The End

Chapter 63 - Cancer?

I finally reached my room. Thank God Jim brought me back timely nd Emi and Rochelle helped me sneak into my room. After I freshen up Emi and Rochelle starts their usual Q/A session and I know I have to answer them which I calmly do. I inform about each and every single thing happened last night also that I was so stupid to climb the window while he's Mom was not home. They burst into laughter and I give a usual shitty look at them though I expected this. "I'm hungry. Let's get down and make something by ourselves today", I suggest and they gladly join after which we three put on the apron after reaching the kitchen and start preparing for some pancakes. We do all the things necessary and finally it's ready. This smells so good! We grab our plates and head to our room after which we again start watching 'The Love Equations'. I missed many episodes which they both already finished watching last night. Anyway, I'll cover that later.

It's been 1 pm and we're still watching. But I can't take it anymore. The male lead just broke up with the female. It's feels I'm facing this and my heart is just getting teared apart even by the thought of breaking with Jim. Why this restlessness? Why this alien feeling? 

"Come down for lunch", auntie shouts from downstairs after which we go down and have our food. I need to go to the hospital to collect my reports today. But weird! Jim didn't text me or call even once. I guess he forgot. After I'm back in my room, I dial his number to call him but he's not picking up. I dial again but no answer. I'm getting late for the hospital. I get ready and heads out after making an excuse of visiting the library since I don't want auntie or Emi to know about the doctor. I ride on the bus and finally reach the hospital. On the way I have been constantly calling him but he didn't pick up. Now I am getting restless. Is he alright? So many thoughts are rupturing on my mind as I am sitting in the waiting area when the nurse finally calls me in. I wish Jim was here! 

"Hello".

"Hi", I greet the doctor. 

"So your reports are here", her eyes are focused on the computer screen in front of her. But right now, I'm not concerned about my reports. All I am thinking is of him. I hope he's alright. 

"Eila", Rebecca faces me as she moves forward to her table. "Didn't anyone come with you today? Your boyfriend or anyone?"

"No", I simply answer.

"Oh. I don't know how to say. Look your blood reports just arrived. It shows you have abnormal increase in your WBC", her face turns gloomy. I wonder what's wrong. "The symptoms you mentioned earlier, CBC report, this indicates to Leukemia". My whole body gets frozen. Leukemia! That's a blood cancer. No, this is not true. I am alright. I'm completely alright. "I know this is to devastating to hear. I wish someone was present here with you today."

"Leukemia?"

"Yeah. But to know what type is it and all, you need to do a Bone Marrow test". What is she saying. My body is not coping with my mind. I can feel no emotion right now. I can't have cancer. My whole life floods in front of my eyes. This distant feeling is breaking me apart. I want to live. I want to be with Jim, I want to fulfill my dreams. Emi and auntie can't bear this. What will happen to Jim. 

"Eila. Eila", Rebecca calls and I come back to my senses. "You should get done with the bone marrow test as soon as possible. The treatment should be started immediately." My mind is still racing. "Don't worry", Rebecca gets up from her chair and comes near me, "You'll get well. There is treatment. Everything will be alright", she caresses my head. I gather myself up. I can't break down like this. "When shall I do the BMT?"

"Go to the office downstairs and they'll give you the appointment. Show them this paper", she hands me a letter along with the printed copy of my blood report. I get up to leave when Rebecca stops me. "Everything will be alright. Stay positive", I force a smile as she says. I am walking but it feels my soul is detached from my body. I can feel nothing. Everything is jammed in me which is not getting out. I want to cry, scream but I am unable to do that. I'm freezed. "Excuse me ma'am", I hear a man calling me. I already reached the office. I pass him the letter after which he fixes an appointment. It's after 4 days. I head out of the hospital and sit on the bench outside. I wish Jim was here. I bring out my phone to call him but he doesn't answer. I dial again but of no use. I repeat again and again but he's not picking up and now his phone is switched off. I am not liking this feeling anymore. What's wrong with him? I think I should call Sam. 

I dial his number and after 2 ring he picks up. "Hello".

"Sam. Where's Jim?" I'm finding it difficult to let out my voice. 

"Ahh. Eila, he has gone out half an hour back".

"Out? Where? Is he alright? He's not picking my phone and now it's switched off", I can't control this fear any longer. I hope he's fine.

"Not picking your phone?"

"Do you know where he went?"

"Yeah. No. I mean no", Sam answers. But I know he's lying. I can guess from his tone.

"Sam tell me. I want to know. Is he alright?" I am getting more restless now.

"He has gone to meet Winnie", he finally says. WInnie? He didn't tell me. He knew about visiting the doctor today. Still! 

"Oh. Bye", I cut the call even without giving him a chance to talk. This time all my jammed tears start to fall in full stream. I don't know why I'm crying. Is it because of my reports, or Jim or both. But I just want to cry. This is all I can do now. 

(There's another chap next.)