special -joshler-

-nine-

josh
//tw: self harm scars\\

this is more of a soft chapter ur welcome.

tyler's song was so pretty. he sang it from his heart. it meant something to him.

we were all speechless. lindsey was the one to tell us we had to leave. she had things to do and while she loved us being there she needed some quiet time.

we all understood and left. we walked to the library and talked the whole way there. tyler didn't really want to talk about his song so we just talked about normal things.

mikey showed us to the comic shelf that madam norman didn't know about. we sat and read comics for a bit.

||-//

at dinner, other people were talking to tyler and i. by other poeple, i mean mikey and ray.

we were the only ones who had heard tyler's song which meant tyler trusted us.

i was glad tyler was making more friends but i couldn't help being jealous of everyone in the room.

i just wanted to spend all my time with just tyler and i, but i knew that couldn't happen and tyler was getting better at socializing which was a good thing.

after dinner, tyler and i went back to our dorm.

we sat and read for a while before frank and gerard came around. we all hung at our dorm until lights out, which was later on weekends.

i hadn't had any private time with tyler today and i don't know why, but that made me upset.

||-//

when i woke up on sunday, tyler wasn't in his bed. i rolled over and checked the time. it was 10:37 am.

i had slept in. for the first time in so long, i had slept in.

as i got changed and headed downstairs, i smiled the whole time.

"morning josh!" tyler called from the table as i made my way downstairs.

"morning!"

i sat with tyler, mikey, gerard, and ryan while i ate my breakfast. apparently, today a bunch of us were going swimming at the pool. ryan and brendon had organised it and were hoping everyone could come.

tyler froze up when he heard 'pool'.  because i was sitting next to him, i held his hand until he calmed down. "you don't have to go," i whispered to him.

it was obvious that tyler was going to be self conscious. we had talked about self harm together a few times and tyler probably had scars he didn't want to show.

ryan noticed a few of us weren't really enthusiastic about the pool. "of course, you don't have to come. if you don't want to swim, there's a cafe there, a comic book store down the road and a theatre just a block from there."

tyler relaxed and most the people there agreed on coming.

i wanted to spend time alone with tyler. to talk to him. i knew i shouldn't be feeling this way but i couldn't help it. i really did like him.

tyler looked across at me and smiled. his eyes twinkled in the sun coming in through one of the grand windows. he squeezed my hand lightly before turning his attention back to ryan, who was talking about some cool new comic books that were coming out soon.

once everyone was awake and full of toast and coffee, we made our way to the pool. only half of us were actually getting in the pool.

tyler and i went to the cafe first. no one else was there so this was the first time i was alone with tyler (apart from sleeping) in about two days.

tyler got a strawberry milkshake and i got a chocolate. we sat at a table across from eachother and drank our milkshakes. i wanted to hold tyler's hand under the table. i wanted to tell tyler about my feelings for him but i didn't want to ruin our friendship.

luckily, i didn't have to get up the courage to hold his hand, because tyler took my hand under the table. he smiled at me and i beamed at him.

we both finished our milkshakes while holding hands and when the rest of the boys who weren't swimming were leaving, we followed them.

about half of us walked down to the comic book store. we spent about and hour there before buying a bunch of comics and going to the movie theatre.

they were playing a lot of old movies there and we decided to watch back to the future. most of the guys from the pool also came with us.

we all got our popcorn and sat in our seats. tyler and i were next to each other and sharing a large popcorn.

"ONE POINT TWENTY ONE JIGAWATTS?!" the cinema screen screamed at us.

"WHAT THE HELL IS A JIGAWATT?!"

everyone in the theatre laughed at a line they had probably heard a million times.

a ginger haired boy behind us whispered to someone "i could use that in a song."

when the movie finished, tyler and i walked out together laughing. i wasn't looking at where i was going because i was looking at his beautiful eyes and i bumped into someone.

"oh my god! i am so sorry!" it was the ginger boy.

"no no it's fine!" he got his balance back with the help of the curly haired girl he was talking to. "i'm robbie and this is chloe."

"josh, this is tyler." tyler waves slightly.

"do i know you?" robbie asked. "i recognise you from somewhere."

i looked at him and his little fish earring caught my eye. "oh my god, you're the kid who bought that chameleon into school in third grade!"

"yes! josh dun! how are you?" i was so excited to see my old friend again.

(quick note: ik irl they are like 10 years different but let's just pretend they are the same age ok)

we went on talking and it seemed tyler and chloe we're taking to.

robbie and i got each other's phone numbers so we did get out of touch and we agreed to meet up again next weekend.

as tyler and i walked back to school, i couldn't stop smiling.