No Control // Wolfstar

Forty

The werewolf. Ever since Remus Lupin was a little boy, he longed for friendship. He always had scars. He always looked tired. Nobody ever wanted to get close to him.

The follower. Peter Pettigrew is funny, no doubt, derived from always trying to please his mother as a child. He's loyal to those with authority and wears his heart out on his sleeve. But he is an invertebrate. And always will be.

The rogue. Growing up, Sirius Black really only ever had one friend. Regulus. But that changed when news spread he was sorted into Gryffindor. The brothers fell apart and just like that - they were strangers.

The leader. James Potter lived his childhood lavishly. Being the only child, the only successor to his family's massive inheritance, he was spoilt rotten. But he was a giver by nature. He wanted to share his wealth with all the people he cared about. With great power, comes great responsibility. He learned that not everybody had his best interests at heart.

The Marauders are an odd group: the werewolf, the follower, the rogue, and the leader. Their pasts shaped who they are and who they will become. Anybody who saw them knew who they were. The four of them had become so inseparable, they would do anything for each other. True colors show in times of peril.

The thing about secrets is that they're grey. What one could use to protect, could harm another. Something so insignificant could destroy years of trust, or gain it. How many people can keep a secret until it's not one anymore? The thing about secrets is that everybody has them.

A bitter feeling resides in Remus' stomach. Sirius was hiding something. He could feel it. Anytime the discussion of that night was brought up, he would avoid it and somehow change the subject. Of course, the last time he questioned Sirius it almost ended catastrophic. They were in a good place now. Happy. Who was he to pry for secrets when he had one as well?

The entire castle was still in a frenzy, but it had eased when Dumbledore spoke on the issue. He assured everybody that things were being solved - though in truth it was far from that. The buzz had died, but the eerie idea still lingered in the corridors.

The Marauders still band together with the help of Lily in order to figure out what happened that night, but it was hard when all the parts were fragmented. They all had pieces of the puzzle, yet none of them fit together.

"Now tell me, what were you doing out of bed Tuesday night?" Sirius asks. Frances' face drops. "I saw you."

"Y-You did?" Frances gulps nervously.

"Come with me." Sirius pops open the door to a nearby classroom, checking to make sure it was empty. He holds the door for Frances, watching as she pads in. She sits on one of the desks as Sirius pulls up a chair, flipping it around to sit on so that his arms could lean on the back of it. "Tell me you didn't have anything to do with Lisa Ward's attack," he says timidly.

"I didn't!"

"Are you lying to me?"

"No! I wouldn't lie to you Sirius."

Sirius nods approvingly. "So what were you doing?"

Frances picks at her nail polish. "Tuesday I had History of Magic. I overheard...a rumor." Sirius furrows his eyebrows in concentration, nudging her to continue. "That Lisa was going to attack you that night. They were all talking about it, but I wasn't supposed to hear it."

"Who?"

"The Slytherins."

"Regulus?" Frances nods wretchedly. "Fuck."

"I wanted to make sure that you were going to be okay!" She shifts on the table and crosses her legs. "So I snuck out of the common room late at night. I saw you so I hid behind one of the statues, but I guess you still saw me." Sirius nods. "I was going to follow you, but then I think I saw one of your friends. A girl."

"Lily Evans?"

"I suppose so. She's got long hair, right?"

"Yeah."

"I would've kept going, but Peeves found me. He wouldn't stop harassing me and yelling 'Student out of bed' so I ran back to my dorm. I promise I didn't do anything more!"

"Frances, calm down." Sirius reaches a hand to her. "I believe you." He stands, kicking the chair aside to pull her into a hug. Her thin arms wrap around him as she buries her head into his chest.

"Did any of that help?" Frances asks, her voice slightly muffled.

"I don't know...I already knew all of the information, you just confirmed it." He holds her tightly until her breathing calms down. His eyes are closed and the images of that night come back. The same blue light shoots out from the darkness. It replays in his head over and over again, but he refused to accept it. The same image had appeared in his mind when they were reenacting the scene, when Peter had asked him to remember. The same person. "I've got to go, Frances."

*

*

*

Remus storms out of the library determined to find Sirius. He has to tell him about the night of the full moon. Abigail was off her rocker. It'd meant nothing. She was just trying to mess with his mind. "James!" he calls, spotting the messy haired boy.

James stops, a smile of relief appearing on his face. "Moony!" he says. "I've been looking for you." He takes a moment to look at Remus. "Are you okay?"

"Have you seen Sirius?"

"Not since this morning. Why?"

"I-I just need to talk to him."

"Okay...maybe he's back at the dorm."

"Alright, thanks."

Remus departs down the corridor leaving James dumbfound. James trusted his friends more than anything, no doubt, but something didn't feel right.

You're just being paranoid, he tells himself. Remus tells you everything.

He continues on his way sliding past a group of first years up the stairs. Pushing his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose, things get slightly clearer. People part suddenly shouting angrily. Immediately James turns around, pushing past his fellow peers. "Sirius!" James shouts. He reaches the ground, racing after him. "Where are you going?"

"Prongs I don't have time to talk!" Sirius says without stopping.

James freezes on the spot, students bustling around him. Surely that wasn't Sirius Black. Sirius wouldn't blow him off like that. He pries at his hair, running his hand through it twice. First Remus, now him. It wasn't like his friends to keep things from him. Especially now - when every piece of information was crucial. "Bugger, I'm turning into Lily..." he grumbles.

They weren't really getting anywhere so to speak. All the information was repetitive. Lily wasn't any closer to figuring out than the rest of them. She was too busy trying to get James to spill his secrets. And the truth is, James did lie. He wasn't going to follow Sirius that night. But Lily couldn't find that out. James was to make sure of that.