[[[all of my flaws]]][[[part ii]]]

35.

I enjoyed watching her squirm when she got out of bed. Her face was bright red with embarrassment and she wouldn't look me in the eye. It was absolutely hilarious. She spent the rest of the night avoiding me and after the show, went straight to bed in the hotel to sleep off her hangover.

We were staying in Scotland that night and we'd all decided to follow Lily's lead and get early nights. But as always, I found it hard to actually fall asleep. I played on my phone for a bit, responding to fans tweets and some emails. After an hour or so of that and still wide awake, I got a book out of my bag.

'Ha.' I said out loud as I realised which book I'd grabbed from the shelf back home. It was the book she'd bought me, 1984. A few weeks after she had left I took the ring that had been in my pocket the whole time, kept safe incase she came home, and I had tied it to the string bookmark attached to the book with mine. They dangled in the air, a little dusty and in need of a clean. I played with them, swinging them back and forth. Inside the pages was the photo we'd had taken outside Big Ben. A lifetime ago. We both seemed so...happy.

We'd need to get the divorce sorted soon. I wasn't too sure how you got one. I wasn't even sure how to broach the subject with her. We couldn't stay married, it wasn't fair on either of us. I was only holding her back from finding someone. But maybe I didn't want to let go.