Solangelo One Shots

Longing or Lust(p4)

Sex stuff bla bla bla, you guys know the drill. Anyway, last part and I just want to say thank you from the literal depths of my heart, thank you for 300k! It's something I never thought I'd hit, and I hope that this extra little story will remind you guys of how much I love you:)

Will's POV

He had never thought they'd ever be in his bed fully clothed, Nico laying across his bed, holding Will's arm to his chest as Will wraps locks of Nico's hair around his fingertips, staring lazily at the tv screen. It feels strangely more intimate than the sex, even though he could watch tv with anyone. There's something about the act of just holding Nico to his chest, feeling the rise and fall of his chest with the breaths against his own body, that's more intimate than Will ever could have imagined. He loves it more than he thought he would. He just regrets not seeking it out sooner. "I told Percy, by the way," Nico says, his voice casual. But even though his tone is calm, Will can feel his chest hitch, his breathing less steady than before. And as the words leave Nico's mouth, Will feels his heart seize up, and even though he's laying down, he's lightheaded.

"What?"

"He's my best friend, and he knew something was up." He pushes himself up off of Will's chest, propping himself up on his elbow and that's the first tie that's broken, that sense of intimacy gone. "I made him promise not to tell anyone. And people already know you like boys so as long as he doesn't tell anyone about us it's okay, right?" His eyebrows are furrowed, his lips pursed, a bead of sweat making an appearance just below his hairline. He's trying hard to keep his air of coolness but he's failing, and Will is sure that he's doing even worse.

"You didn't have to tell him."

"I'm a terrible liar. He'd figure it out somehow." A flash of anger appears in Nico's eyes but it's gone within half a second, replaced with a bad effort to keep himself calm. That's the goal for both of them, and they can both tell. "Why does it matter so much, anyway?"

"I dunno," Will says, peering around Nico's body at the tv. Maybe it'll stop the panic that's taking over Will if he can focus on the pixellated bodies on the screen, on the light dialogue, he can forget about the argument that's brewing on the horizon. But whether on accident or on purpose Nico moves in front of his line of vision and suddenly, the tv isn't a barrier anymore because Nico is sitting on his heels, arms crossed over his chest with a look of hurt in his eyes that makes Will's heart pang. "I just don't want my friends to find out."

"Why?"

"Nico, come on." He tries to move so that he can see the tv again but Nico moves, following every move he makes and he chews on his nail, glancing at his floor. "It's kinda weird, right?"

"What is?" There's a sense of accusation in his voice even though there isn't anything for Will to be accused of and he blows out a shaky sigh, pushing himself up and drawing his knees to his chest. It's somewhat of a comforting position, almost like a barrier between him and the world. This was supposed to be a simple relationship, one full of cuddles and kisses and cheesy dates that they both love. But no relationship is simple, he realizes, especially not when they've been hooking up consistently for the past few months, and especially not when one of them has been harboring secret feelings of longing for at least half of that time. He would be naive to expect no complication.

"Us, together." He speaks tentatively, choosing his words carefully, although he's never been good at tact. He can see that as Nico's frown deepens but he stays quiet, probably waiting to see if Will will say something that will be good this time, somewhat intelligent this time. They both know he won't, though. "It's like, we're from very different friend groups, you know?" He waits, breathless, hoping that he doesn't say what he means. Hoping that he doesn't reveal how scared he is of being teased, how desperate he is for the approval of his friends and how he'll keep a relationship he's so happy about private if he means getting that approval.