Complexes (LGBT) (boyxboy)

chapter 12

Chapter 12

In a groggy, half asleep state I kept my sheets pulled over my head while a menacing Eddie stood over me. He had been trying to get me up for about an hour now but all I wanted to do was stay here and sleep. "Get up!" he practically shouted.

The sounds no doubt echoed past our door and into the hall. "No. I don't wanna. Tell Coach I have a cold," I said and rolled onto my side. "No!" Eddie yelled. I felt the sheet being torn from my fingertips. He ripped it from my body, leaving me feeling cold.

I looked at him with an annoyed expression. "God, leave me alone," I groaned and sat up to try and grab the sheet back, but he stepped away. "No. I don't why you've been a freaking hermit crab in here for the past couple days, but it's game night! Now get up, and God damn it, have a shower, get dressed and get down to the field," I glared at him before lurching forward and snatching back my sheet.

I flopped back down onto the bed, pulling it over me once again. "No. You can do it without me," I grumbled through the thin material. "No we can't.

Coach will kill you. He will literally come up here and strangle you. Your dad's gonna be there too, like usual, and he'll kill you too if you don't show up," he said. I paused, thinking about what he just told me.

He did have a really good point about my dad being there. As much as I wanted to avoid the entire world, or at least one tiny aspect of it, I knew I had to go to the game. I pushed the blankets off of myself and looked up at Eddie with a less than impressed expression. "Alright, fine," I sighed. He smiled brightly. "That's the spirit!" he said enthusiastically.

I groaned and got out of bed, not being bothered to deal with Eddie anymore right now, and grabbed some things before heading off towards the showers. I had barely left my room for two days, and even now I was cautious as I walked around the building. I was avoiding Lucas. That much was obvious to me and I wouldn't try and deny it for a second, although I would deny it if he asked. I just didn't want to risk running into him and having a more than awkward conversation.

I was embarrassed about what I did in the stairwell that night. I was confused more than anything.

I couldn't believe I kissed a guy. Mostly I couldn't believe how much I actually liked it. He made me feel things I craved to feel every time I was with a girl. I couldn't take this any further than the kiss though. I just couldn't. It was a stupid thing to do in the first place. My mind was playing games on me, trying to convince me that I was into Lucas, but I knew I wasn't. It was just because of my feelings for him in high school that made me kiss him, that was all. I didn't actually like him now.

That would be ridiculous. I wasn't gay. I never have been and nor will I ever be gay. That boy just messed with my mind so much though. It was only a kiss.

It was a dumb kiss in the heat of the moment. I did it out of curiosity, really. I wanted to know what it was like and now that I did it, I regretted it so much.

I hadn't communicated with Lucas at all since it happened. I hadn't even seen him in the halls.

Granted, I was barely in them. I had no idea what he thought about all of this. I didn't want to hurt him, but I didn't want to lead him on or give him the wrong idea either, which I knew I had done by now.

I was so lost in my thoughts and doing everything on auto-pilot that before I knew it, I was with Eddie, walking along the sidelines of the field. It was night time and the bleachers were filled with either students or family coming down to watch the game. The atmosphere was unusual tonight. Instead of feeling pumped up at the thought of playing a game, I felt completely drained. I didn't want to be here.