chapter 10

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❝ After all, I never wanted to be an example to anyone

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❝ After all, I never wanted to be an example to anyone. 

The way that I was living, it was killing me. I knew it and yet I didn't try to stop it. Why? I had no real reason to live anyway. At least not until now. 

'' This is not the first time that I've got blood on my hands, '' I mumbled while I was watching Baekhyun. He was carefully washing the blood off my trembling hands. His face remained emotionless and he was surprisingly gentle, even if it was clear that there was something troubling him. We just finished interrogating my family's accountant and things didn't go as well as we were hoping that they would. The man who was once a friend of my father, wasn't prepared to talk, at least not until the pain forced him to do it. '' You don't have to do this. ''

'' You're right, I don't, '' he lowly murmured. I tried to pull my hands from his grip, but he suddenly wrapped his fingers around them and held them tightly. He kept his head lowered and his voice was even quieter when he added: '' But I want to. So, stop being difficult and do me this small favor, will you? Also, don't come out of the bathroom just yet. Bambam is drawing lines of cocaine on my kitchen table. He's kind of excited for tonight. He likes it when the Elite club does dangerous things like these. ''

He didn't trust me around drugs and he was right not to. I didn't trust myself either, at least not yet. Despite everything, I still miss the feeling of being high and I knew that I always would. 

'' You're being way too overprotective lately, '' I mumbled and lowered my head. I almost screamed when he suddenly put his hands on my hips and lifted me on the sink. I was holding my breath until I realized that he simply wanted to make things easier for himself. He gently held on to my hands again, clean from all the blood now and started wiping them with a towel. I watched him with a stunned expression on my face, then I cracked a small smile and asked: '' Did my uncle receive the same treatment as me? When you were still working for him? I find that hard to imagine. ''

'' No. You're special, '' he murmured absentmindedly. His eyes were narrowed in concentration and he didn't bother to raise his head and meet my gaze when he added: '' Just be quiet and let me care for you, okay? Or is that too difficult for you? ''

Once he left me alone in the bathroom, I leaned against the sink and stared at my reflection in the mirror. That night, we were planning to go to one of my family's clubs. We were after the card that would allow us to access the money that my parents' left for me, but we were also looking for something incriminating that would put my uncle in jail. We already knew how we were going to get inside the club, but after that - we could only hope that everything would go well.

Out in the hallway, I could hear the sound of Vernon and Yukhei's hushed voices. They were standing on one side of the living room and arguing about something. I was trying to postpone joining the two of them, Bambam and Chanyeol for as long as possible, but I knew that at one point, I would have to face them. 

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