ashton: It was one of those days. The days were you hated your body, feeling so low about yourself you would skip a meal. You usually did a good job keeping it to yourself, trying to pass Ashtons inquiries off with a wave of your hand saying you ate earlier, but now that you lived together it was harder because he was always there. The two of you would eat meals together every day, whether it was breakfast, lunch or dinner, you made a point of at least sharing a meal. But today, you didn’t want to eat. You didn’t want to eat because if you did it would mean gaining calories. Ashton poured himself his cereal, leaning against the counter as you sat at the island. “You’re not eating breakfast?” He questioned, taking a bite. You shook your head, “No, I’m not hungry.” You replied. “But you love breakfast, you never miss it. Are you ill?” He said walking to where you were sitting. “No, I’m fine. I just don’t want anything,” You said avoiding his eyes. “(Y/N), you know you can talk to me right? You didn’t eat very much dinner last night come to think of it…” He said trailing off, his brows furrowing. “And you really haven’t been eating much lately at all…” He said putting down his cereal and turning your head to look at you. “You are beautiful, I want you to know that I love you no matter what. You don’t need to loose weight, hell I’d love you if you were as big as this house. I love you, not a number on the scale.” He said, as you felt tears in your eyes. “Please, just eat a little? You’re going to make yourself sick if you don’t.” He pushed his bowl towards you as you sighed. “For me?” He said kissing your cheek. You bit your lip contemplating it. You sighed taking a spoonful and chewing, your stomach growling in appreciation at the nutrients. “Thank you, I love you, you’re to beautiful to do this to yourself. Now finish the cereal, we can go for a walk later and talk.” He said smiling, leaving you to his bowl, as he poured himself a new one and smiled at you.
Calum: You pushed around your food on your plate, stabbing at the pasta on the plate and shifting it around. Pasta meant starches and starches meant carbs, something you were trying to rid yourself of. You were worried about your weight, seeing all the girls Calum met on a day to day basis made you look at yourself differently. They were all pretty, wearing crop tops and short shorts, while you never had the courage nor the confidence to wear those things in public. “You haven’t touched your pasta at all, do you not like it?” Calum asked, hurt in his words. He had taken it upon himself to cook you a meal since you usually cooked. You hadn’t lately because of how late you have been working and his hectic schedule. “No, no! It’s great!” You said taking a bite and chewing it. “You can tell me,” He said laughing. “I may or may not have overcooked it,” He chuckled. “No it’s great Cal, I’m just not that hungry thats all.” He looked at you a little funny, as you went back to pushing your food around and occasionally taking a bite. You cleared the table and went to the living room, grabbing your laptop and opening it to the diet page you had bookmarked, not seeing Calum behind you. You read an article on how to burn body fat easy and fast. “(Y/N), why are you reading that?” He said, startling you. “It’s nothing!” You said closing your laptop and placing it in front of you, trying to seem normal. “He sat down beside you, his expression sad. “What’s wrong?” He said grabbing your hands in his. “Nothing, it’s fine!” You said biting your lip and trying to avoid his hard stare. “Somethings wrong, you know you don’t have to lose weight. What would make you think that? You’re beautiful,” He said pulling you closer. With reluctance you scooted closer. “It’s fine, you’ll think its silly anyways,” You said, a blush creeping up on your cheeks. “Wanna bet? Talk to me.” He said playing with your fingers. You sighed, “It’s just all the girls you meet are prettier and thinner then I am. They wear all that short stuff and look great in it and I just look… blah. I read that if you cut out carbs and starches then you drop weight…” You said your voice slowly going quiet at the end. You sat in silence for a bit, your heart rate picking up. You knew he would think it was silly. “(Y/N), you don’t have to do that. Hell, you’re already a twig. It doesn’t matter what those girls look like. Because I only have eyes for you. And you being blah, well hun, you clearly haven’t seen yourself in the mirror lately because you are smoking. Do you know how many times I have to smack the boys for watching you when you walk by? Curves are sexy, you’re sexy. Please don’t diet because you think I’ll loose interest. If you want to lose weight, we’ll tone instead. We’ll work out together, it will be fun!” He said hugging you, as your blush increased in temperature. “Really?” You asked. “I love you, and only you, no matter what. You’re beautiful”
Luke: Wow, either she’s pregnant or she’s packing it on. The words echoed in your head as you once again spilled the contents of your stomach into the toilet. The paparazzi had commented on a photo of you and Luke out for the day, and ever since you couldn’t bear to at yourself in the mirror, that one sentence echoing in your head until you wanted to pull your hair out. It had only happened once, making yourself ill but now it was a regular thing as you noticed the weight steadily dropping off of you. You hid it well from Luke, passing his inquiries off with a wave of you hand and a ‘just exercising’ comment. But it wasn’t muscle you were building. You coughed and wiped your mouth, standing up and rinsing your mouth with mouth wash before walking out of the bathroom, jumping slightly seeing Luke standing at the doorway. His arms were crossed over his chest and his brows were furrowed slightly. “Hey,” You said smiling at him. “You were sick again.” He said, his tone was concerned and hard. Your heart rate picked up, how were you going to get out of this one? “I’m fine,” You said walking past him. His hand landed you on your shoulder, pulling you back. “No, you aren’t fine. This has been an ongoing thing. You’re dropping a lot of weight (Y/N), like you’ve lost what ten pounds in under two weeks?” You averted your gaze shaking your head. “It’s fine.” You said, it seeming to reassure you. “Baby,” His tone softened. “Please don’t make yourself sick to lose weight. You are so beautiful to do that to yourself. Whats making you?” He said grabbing your hands in his and rubbing small circles on the back of your hand. “Nothing…” You trailed off, your gaze lingering on the floor. “It’s something, please tell me. I don’t want you doing this to yourself, it’s worrying me sick!” You sighed and pulled your hands away walking away from him. You contemplated showing him the article, spilling every worry to him but you were worried about what his reaction would be. Would he think you were stupid for doing this? As if he was reading your thoughts, “Please tell me? I’d never judge, I want to help you.” He said following you. You felt sharp hot tears prick your eyes as you walked to your nightstand and pulled out the page, the demon in the drawer and showed it to him. He looked at you before reading it, whimpering slightly. “Fucking hell, fuck!” He yelled making you flinch. “No, no. I’m not angry at you baby, no never. Please don’t listen to this kind of thing. They’re fucking assholes. You’re so much better then this, please don’t do this to yourself. I’m going to help you okay? We’re going to get through this. Please let me help you.” You let the tears fall, crumbling into his lap as he held you and rocked you gently, murmuring sweet nothings in your ear.
Michael: You woke up to the sound of beeping beside you. You groggily looked around, realizing that this was not your bed, that these were not your pajamas but a hospital smock and a hard bed. Tubes stuck out of you hands, an IV dripping into your arm. You blinked seeing a mop of blonde hair beside you, his hand holding yours. You tried talking but your throat was thick with no use, but he heard you clear it, his head shooting up. He blinked a tear slipping from his eye as he saw you. “Oh god (Y/N),” He said sobbing now. You looked at him confused, as memories came flooding back. Walking with Michael and suddenly feeling weak, your knees giving out as tiny black dots danced before you vision as you crumbled to the ground, darkness encompassing you. You knew the reason, and now Michael knew. You tried eating as little as possible - only enough to keep you going, but that wasn’t enough. Your body shut down, going into a hibernation at the lack of nutrients supporting it. You felt better, knowing that the IV was helping you. “Why did you do that to yourself? You could have talked to me, not starved yourself. I feel horrible… was I not there enough? Was it something I said?” He managed to choke out as you yourself felt tears leak from you eyes. “No Michael, it wasn’t you. The fans can be harsh that’s all. Some of the stuff they said got me down… I thought I had it under control. God, I’m so sorry to put you through this.” You said, your tears falling heavier now. “But babe, you’re so gorgeous, how can you not see that? You were healthy… how did I not notice before?” He said, you could tell what you had done was tearing him apart inside and you felt guilt turn in your empty stomach. “I’m so sorry Michael.” “No, I’m sorry. I should have been there more, I should have noticed… oh god I’m so sorry. I’m going to help you. I’m not going to leave your side. I’m going to help you get through this and we’re going to get you healthy again. I’m so sorry (Y/N).” He said grabbing your hand and holding it, as his shoulders shook. You held his hand, knowing Michael never broke his promises.
