In the arms of no one (Completed)

17. Hide and seek (Edited)

Tiernan's POV
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Morning light filters and pierces through the rustle of trees moving above my head and onto my eyes as I wake up to the sounds of the forest around me.  With the sounds and light the memories of discovering the horrors she had to suffer at the hands of her family forcibly infiltrates my mind.

At the hands of my best friend and girlfriend's family!

FUCK!

The ache in my heart as I saw the flashes of images and diluted sounds from her memories will haunt me for the rest of my days. How could anyone do that to a child, to someone as beautiful as her.

How could anyone hurt someone so badly that they beg and scream for death to take them? Watching her screaming and crying at the moon broke my heart, caused tears to come to eyes at the pure and unadulterated lack of hope she felt fills me once again.

Titus whimpers and whines in my head, crying for the pain of our mate.  Everything has officially turned to shit!  Titus wants nothing to do with any relative from Valen's mothers side of the family.  That unfortunately includes my girlfriend, Bianca and her brother Storm. 

I, on the other hand, continue to love both of them deeply.

It's unheard of, in Pack life, for anyone to treat a child that way, the only wolves capable of such premeditated violence are the ones that leave or are exiled, we call them Rogues. Some, but not all, are a danger to themselves as well as others; wolves, other supernaturals and humans alike.

She had no one, she suffered all alone while I lived a life that is blessed with loving parents, loyal friends and a loving girlfriend.  To make matters worse I made her suffer more by rejecting her, something that I now know would have exacerbated her feelings of loneliness. Then I allowed and condoned the social isolation of my mate, I knew it was bad, that it was going to hurt her when we all of a sudden stopped hanging out with her. But I didn't care, all I cared about was that my girlfriend was happy, even if that meant that I was becoming increasingly unhappy.

I could feel her pain, her loneliness, her insecurities.

I did that. I'm an asshole that added to her pain and all because I thought that she was a weakling who has panic attacks. I couldn't have been more wrong, she is way stronger than I could have ever imagined.

I was and still am ashamed of my actions, so I ran. I ran not just because of my shame, but I hoped that the freedom of running in my wolf form would give me some reprieve from the aching pain in my heart.

I betrayed her more than any one in her life and she doesn't even know it.

Titus whines and cries again deep in my mind. He has basically been non existent since I rejected her, refusing to talk to me, but last night while I lost myself in the arms and body of Bianca, Titus growled at me in anger, showing me images of how he would really like to rip into her if I only let my control over us go.

Everything that happened to Valen last night, was my fault. I caused her pain.  I forced her wolf to the surface to protect her body, when I accepted and then mated with Bianca, the only thing that needed to be done was marking her.  I thank the moon goddess, who ironically turns out to be Valen's Great Ancestor, that my father broke through my walls and was able to mind-link me that Valen was in trouble. If I had completed it then I know that Valen wouldn't have survived.

By the time Bianca and I had made it to the Stevensons side yard, she had already shifted into her beautiful white wolf, her eyes the colour of shiney emeralds and amethysts.

I have never seen a white wolf, in fact I don't think any one in Shadow Moon ever has, I remember my grandfather telling me stories of his encounter with the white wolves of Pack Snow Wolf, before he died. But that was a long time ago and until recently there was no need for any of their members to visit this part of the world.