CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

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The tenth annual Pierce's Christmas party was nearing quite quickly, causing the office to become more frantic and busy and leaving no time for breaks or chit-chatting. Which was honestly for the best; especially after the day I confessed how I felt to Damien.

With not having any time to spare with talking, it allowed us to avoid having awkward conversations after that day. Damien seemed to forget about it, or at least try to not bring it up, which I was forever grateful about. 

I had decided not to tell anyone about that day. Nobody needed to know it, and frankly, I didn't want the opinions of Erin and Amelia of whether it was wrong or right. They would just tell me that I did love him and it wasn't just a mishap, which I knew.

Saying it was an accident and I didn't mean it was just a hoax for Damien to get over it. Whether he believed it or not was another story. But it didn't matter anymore. He seemed to move past it and I was trying to.

Even though I couldn't.

The fact that I had said it allowed, even allowed it to be truer. But it was wrong. It was wrong because I knew Damien didn't reciprocate it and that just made it some sort of unrequited love.

Then why not just break it off with him? My conscience spoke.

I lay my head down on my desk with a sigh, drumming my fingers against the desk. It was selfish of me not to break it off with him. I couldn't imagine seeing him with another girl so I'd rather just keep being with him and know that it was a one-sided love than let him go.

The more I thought about it, the more fucked up it really was.

"What the actual flying fuck Isla." My abruptly lift my head, meeting the narrowed eyes of Alec's.

"And hello to you too," I mock, under my breath while shutting my laptop screen filled with the invites of the party. 

"Did you actually say I love you to Damien?" My eyes widen as my mouth falls agape.

"He told you?!" I exclaim, incredulously.

Alec raises an eyebrow, "Uh yeah, we tell each other everything. Was he not meant to?" Alec questions cluelessly. I groan in response and bang my head loudly on the table.

"Alec! No, he was definitely not meant to fucking tell you! He said he'd forget about it, and forgetting about it means not telling anyone else," I state clearly, my face growing hot with irritation and distress. 

Alec scratches the back of his neck, losing eye contact with me, "I...I won't say anything more then."

I laugh humorlessly, "You literally did not just come in here throwing a piss at me saying 'I love you' to Damien to not tell me what he said in return."

"Damien will have my head on a chopping block if he knows I told you," Alec says, his eyes largened, "I'm not ready to die Isla."

I narrow my eyes, "Well maybe Damien will be able to accompany you on the chopping block once I confront him." I throw him a bright smile and walk to the door, him trailing after me.

"No! You cannot tell...." Alec trails off as Damien walks into the room.

"What's...Happening?" Damien looks between the two of us before focusing his attention to my angered face, "Hey...What's wrong?"

"I'm not going to be here when shit goes down," Alc mumbles before squeezing through the door and making a run for it.

Damien quietly shuts the door behind him before placing a hand under my chin to pull my eyes to his, "What's wrong baby?" he murmurs, his thumb slowly tracing patterns on my cheek.

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