10 Reasons Why I'm Not Good Enough :||: Yungblud

2.You're Not Skinny Enough

***Trigger Warning***
*Eating disorder symptoms*
*Please skip this chapter if you are sensitive to this*

Instead of searching how to be pretty, I found myself searching how to lose weight quickly.

My weight had never really bothered me too much, I was perfectly comfortable at 132. I got up and looked in the mirror on my wall. I pulled up my shirt and looked at my stomach. It wasn't flat, but I wasn't fat either, it was just a slight little bump. My thighs were a little chunky too. Maybe I was too fat though, maybe I'm just used to the way that I look, that's why its never bothered me?

I sat back down on my bed, scrolling through the links.

Several suggested special diets, while others recommended that I exercise more frequently, and lets be honest, that's not gonna happen.

There was one in particular that seemed to be the easiest of the three. Considering I didn't have much control over what I ate, I couldn't really do any special diets, and like I said, exercise is out of the question. The third seemed like the best option, fasting.

I quickly Googled benefits of intermittent fasting. As I scrolled down though, I saw a question about how much weight can someone lose if they fast for twenty four hours.

I was intrigued immediately. I read the article finding out that I could lose a decent amount of weight, especially if I did it regularly.

I nodded, smiling. I won't eat the rest of the night.

Right after I thought that I heard my mother call me from downstairs.

I hurried down and the second I smelt food, I realized that my plan was ruined.

How am I supposed to fast if I have to eat?

My brain began searching for a solution and quickly came to one.

I walked into the kitchen slowly, placing a hand on my head.

My father looked over to me.

"You feeing okay?" He asked as he put some food on his plate.

"Not really, my stomach kinda hurts and I need to lay down." I said.

My mom came over and placed her hand on my forehead. She held it there for a second before pulling it away. "You're a little warm, do you feel okay to eat?" She asked.

"No." I lied.

"Are you sure?" She asked again.

I nodded.

"Okay, well at least have a cup of juice." She said as she went over and pulled out a cup, pouring me some juice and then heading to sit down.

I quickly drank my juice.

"You're brother wants to play UNO tonight before bed, do you want to?" She asked as I placed my cup in the sink.

"Sure." I said and nodded before heading up to my room.

Once I had my door closed I grabbed my phone, ready to do more research, but there was an unknown number on the screen.

Unknown: How are you feeling?

I open the message feeling confused, but only for a second before I saw the message from earlier, it was Dominic.

Sakaya: A little better

He responded instantly.

Dominic: Good.

Dominic: I just had some good fucking pizza, what did you have?