I Do Until I Don't

Alternate Chapter 40 --- FANNAR POV ---

***** Hey guys! This is the break-up chapter seen through Fannar's eyes. It's not a mandatory read. Also, I don't know if it's too ** sorry for the stereotype** girly... I'm not a guy, so I don't really know how they think. I'd love to hear any of your comments.***

   "Hey guys," someone says behind me, making me jump in surprise.

I turn around and feel my cheeks flush as my eyes meet Ella-Mae's. Even after two months spent together, she still has this effect on me. I didn't know girls could have this effect on me. Especially me. I never was a girl-crazy guy. They're fun to talk about, but I've always preferred hanging out with my friends playing football (or soccer, for you Americans. Everywhere else in the world calls it football, but okay) or talking about music and travelling. And then Ella-Mae arrived and it's like I finally understood what the fuss was all about. She's just so fun to be around. And beautiful, but that's only a bonus.

I try to act cool. What if she heard my conversation with Skylar. I really hope she hasn't. Because now, just looking at her, I can't even remember why I want to fake break-up with her.

Because she likes Alex, a voice inside me reminds me.

"Oh hey!" I say in the most casual voice I can muster.

"Hi," Skylar says with a small, pitched grin. "Fannar told me you were out for the day."

Ella seems caught off guard, and I wonder if maybe she thinks I'm cheating on her. Which I would never do. Cheating is wrong and stupid and I don't even know why someone would do it. Especially if they're in love... Not that I'm in love or anything. But just look at her eyes.

"We finished early," Ella-Mae explains.

"We?"

"My sisters. Melanie --- the oldest --- is getting married and we had a dress tryout."

I feel my eyes gleam as I remember what Ella-Mae told me about last night. She has such a cool bond with her family, and I love it when she talks about them. "So what did you choose?" I ask. Ella takes out her phone from her back pocket and shows me the picture of the dress she chose. I lack in dress-description words to explain what it looks like, but it's, "Nice".

"Yeah," Skylar says.

I forgot she was there, to be honest. When Ella-Mae is close to me... it's like she's the only thing that matters. 

This wasn't supposed to happen. I'm such a jerk. It's not like me to like someone I can't have. I'm a jackass, a horrible friend. She likes Alex. I have to swallow down my feelings and help her get my best friend. Alex's an idea if he doesn't fall for her. I still haven't understood how he hasn't yet.

Speaking of, Skylar clears her throat. "Ummm, Fannar? Weren't you supposed to tell Ella something?"

I blink "What? Oh yeah." I look at Ella-Mae and smile. She smiles back and, I swear, at this moment I don't even need the sun she smiles so bright. Okay, I'm being corny and cheesy and that is not who I am. "Maybe some other time."

When Alex told me he thought Ella would be a good fit for me, I didn't actually think she would be. Alex always tries to mingle in my love life because I have only ever dated to girls (three if you count Ella) and he has dated, well, plenty more. And now that I know Ella? I can't even imagine what I was doing before I had met her which is silly, I know, but I just love the way she thinks and everything she says. If only I had met her sooner. Or if only we lived in the same state. Or if only she didn't like Alex.

But she does, so I have to break-up with her. To give her a chance at the happily ever after she deserves. She's the only person my age I know who actually still believes in them. And she deserves it.