Fluctuate - Van McCann

15

We decided to grab our breakfast and eat it as we walked to class since it was already 11:45. Van chose a cereal bar and I got a fruit cup.

"Hey," Van says. He stops right out front of the classroom door.

"Hey," I repeat back to him.

"Last night I asked you if you'd go out with me tonight. Will you?" He asks. There was no nervousness in his voice, but he also wasn't overly confident.

"Of course," I say. Last night I would have obviously said no, but Van has treated me so well in the past twelve hours that there's no way I could decline. Plus, I really do want to spend more time with Van. I can't seem to get enough of him.

"Alright then, it's a date," he says happily. I smile and look down to hide my cheeks that have most definitely flushed red when he said the word 'date.'

Van's fingers are placed under my chin and he lifts my head up so we were looking each other in the eyes. I watch as his eyes move down to my lips making me feel my body temperature rise again. "God, you're cute when you blush," he whispers under his breath. I can tell he intended for me to hear.

Van's eyes move back up to my eyes. "I'd stay right here and look at you forever, ya know, but we should get inside before class starts," he says.

I nod my head, unable to speak due to the nerves taking control of my whole body. He holds the door open for me to walk through. "There will be plenty of time for us to look at each other tonight, though. I promise," he whispers before I enter the classroom. Shivers run down my spine. What could he mean my that?

Van places his hand on the small of my back as we walk to the back of the classroom where we sat last time. This time, though, there was no sharp tension between us as Professor Green spoke to us. I have to admit, I think I was a little too focused on Van and not focused enough on the lesson.

"So, because this class is so large for a music composition class and you need to get to know some people in here," Professor Green starts explaining to the class of forty students. "I want you to find a partner and compose a song with lyrics for our first assignment. This will be due next Monday, and you'll be performing it to the class." Professor Green was one of those teachers who could control a class and give reasonable assignments, but still be respected as a person. "You can partner with anyone you want. I recommend someone who looks tolerable."

The class starts looking around and chatting softly to find a partner. I look over at Van nervously. What if he doesn't want to be my partner? I open my mouth to speak, but I'm at a loss of words. I swallow and look down, staring at the shoelaces on my black vans.

Van grabs my hand and moves it to his lap. "Go ahead," he whispers. "What were you going to say?" He asks this question a little louder.

I shrug my shoulders. "Nothing. I forget," I say, feeling embarrassed for even thinking of asking. Van probably wants to get to know someone else in the class, not just me.

"No, I want you to ask," Van says. "Don't be nervous around me, Peyton." His voice sounds deeper than normal, which made me feel warm inside. I don't know why Van does this to me.

I try to work up the courage to ask him if he wants to be my partner, but I can't bring myself to do it, and I don't know why. Even if Van didn't want to be my partner, he wouldn't make a big deal out of it, so it doesn't make sense why I can't ask him.

Van squeezes my hand, making me look up at him. "You okay?" He asks. He must have noticed me zoning out. "If it makes it any easier, I know what you're trying to ask. And the answer is yes," he says. He pauses before continuing. "Please, ask me. I just want you to feel comfortable talking with me. I know we kind of got off on the wrong foot."

I nod my head and take a deep breath. "Will you... be my partner?" I ask hesitantly.

"I thought ya'd never ask," Van jokes, a smile on his face. "I don't know why you even thought I'd say no. I ask ya out on a date, after all. Of course I want to spend time with you."

"I know," I say with a sigh. "I don't know why I get so nervous all the time." There's a hint of frustration toward myself in my voice.

"Hey, hey," Van says. I look him in the eyes and he brushes the hair in front of my eyes behind my ear with his other hand that wasn't holding mine. "Don't be mad at yourself. We'll work on it."

I was about to thank Van for his words, but Professor Green speaks before I can. "Alright, hopefully you all have a partner now. That's about all I had planned today. The music practice rooms are down the hall and always open for you guys to practice in. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask me," he concludes his lesson.

Van lets go of my hand and grabs his backpack from the floor. He begins packing up his notebook and laptop. "You wanna go work on our song? I think we have a good story to tell," he suggests.

"Yeah, lets go," I agree with him. "I wanna see the practice rooms anyway. I hear they're really nice." I smile, even though I probably look like an idiot getting excited over something as stupid as a room.

"We'll see about that," Van says. "If I knew you were that eager to go to a practice room, I would've taken you last night," he laughs which makes me laugh too.

He picks my backpack up from the floor and helps me put my laptop back inside. "Thanks," I say, zipping it up and putting it on my back.

Van and I are the last two people to leave the classroom, besides Professor Green, who was sitting at his desk.

"See you guys later," he says as we reach the door.

"Bye, Professor Green. Thanks for the lesson," Van says as he holds the door open for me.

Once we get outside the classroom, Van grabs wraps his arm around my shoulders. I lean in and walk closer to him, smelling the slight scent of smoke from a cigarette and his cologne that I remember him putting on this morning.

"Practice room are this way, darling," he says as we walk farther down the hall.

We walk to the very last room. "How about this one?" He asks. "Probably never used, it's so far down here."

"Looks good to me," I say. Van opens the door to reveal a small, but still comfortably sized room.

"Ladies first," he motions with his hands for me to enter, which I gladly do. He walks in after and shuts the door, leaving us alone in the room.