(again, sorry for the american terms for things, but this is in a school in london. i just didn't look up the proper terms.)
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|warnings: mentions miscarrying | words: 674 |
"you guys, settle down, please!" i say to my class of twenty. the 10 year olds all looked at my from their stations.
"its time for the movie. so, please clean up your centers and sit at your desks once you're done." i smile, flipping the timer, watching the kid's all hurry to be the first one back at their desk.
"mrs. jones, someone's at the door."
"can you get it for me? thank you." i ask, smiling as i typed an email to send to the principal.
i glances up to see ben with a bouquet of sunflowers, looking around the room.
"which movie do you want to watch?" i ask the group, and a loud chaos of answers was shouted back at me.
"lily, you pick." i point to the pigtailed girl in the front row.
"moana." she smiles, everyone else agreeing on the movie.
i put the movie on, and turn the fluorescents off, the kids too into the movie to notice.
"well, hello, ben." i smile, finally getting the chance to talk to him.
"hi, love." he smiles, wrapping his arm around me in a small hug. we pull away from our hug, pecking each other quick on the lips.
"what brought you to see me today?" i ask, taking the flowers and putting them on my desk, pulling an extra chair over for ben to sit.
"just visiting. i missed seeing you more often than we get to see each other now-"
"mrs. jones! daniel's bleeding!" lily says, pulling my attention away from ben, and back to my class.
"daniel, come here." i stand up from the desk, going to grab the first aid kit from the cabinet, sitting daniel on the stool so i could see what happened.
after putting a bandaid over a paper cut, i send daniel back to his seat, clean up the messes made, and go back to my desk.
"sorry." i apologize to ben, taking his hand in mine as i looked around to make sure everyone was okay.
"you know, you're really good with kids." ben smiles, i smile back.
"what are you getting at here?"
"well, we've been married for a year and a half now, and we're not getting any younger-" "ben, we're both in our twenties. we're not even old."
"i just really think we should at least try?"
i love the idea of having kids. a small version of ben or myself running around the house was thrilling to me. but i've been pregnant two times before and lost the baby wishing the first trimester both pregnancies, so i'm just nervous about trying. what if we can't have kids? or if we aren't meant to?
"can we talk about this later?" i ask looking at the clock, the final bell about to ring.
"yeah, course."
"okay! the bell is getting ready to ring, i'll see you all on monday!" i smile, pausing the movie. all of the kids standing up by the door.
"bye mrs. jones!" the class said in unison as the bell rang, all shoving each other to get out.
"so, kids?" ben asks, following me around the room as i turned all of the extension cords off and made sure i wouldn't be the cause of a fire.
"look, ben. i want nothing more than to have kids with you. to have a family, but after the last two, i'm scared. i just don't want to disappoint you."
"baby, you haven't ever disappointed me. sometimes it just happens, it's not your fault. i'm not busy all weekend if you're down to, well, you know..." ben chuckles lightly, holding both of my hands, not letting me move until i said something.
"okay, tonight?" i ask, and ben smiles.
"yeah, let's start tonight."
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sorry it's so short! i'm writing (possibly) what happens when they go home ;)
