third time's a charm

"the aaron vales whisperer"

chapter eighteen: the aaron vales whisperer

Sunday, December 17. 2:41 pm.

"Get your ass in here!" I whisper-yelled as I pulled Rowan into my house. She was laughing quietly; she was clearly amused. I continued to pull her along until we had gone upstairs and were in my room. I locked my door behind us and twirled around to look at her. "Rowan!"

"I know!" We both squealed in sync, and she grabbed my arm before pulling me over to my bed. "I wanted to tell you immediately; it has been killing me."

"I can't believe you were able to keep it from me!" We both fell onto our back as wide smiles found their way to our faces. "I am so excited, Rowan."

"I can't believe it's actually happening," she told me, shaking her head slowly. "Last night was a dream. He told me he loved me—"

"I know he did," I told her, smiling as I turned my head to look at her. "He told me everything... and he was so happy. God, I am so happy for you."

We both became quiet as we continued to process everything. My happy thoughts started to become clouded with thoughts of keeping my relationship hidden from Vales, which caused me to sigh.

"What is it?" Rowan propped herself up as she looked over at me. Her eyebrows were furrowed and although she had never failed to understand me completely, I was amazed that she knew something was wrong so quickly.

"It's nothing, I don't want to take away from—"

"Ellie, don't be silly," she said, shaking her head. "What's up?"

"I just wish I could tell Vales... about Jamie. I want to so badly, but it's not that easy. I just feel like the longer I keep it from him, the worse his reaction is going to be... I'm freaking out about it. And I don't want it to be something you have to keep from him, too. You guys should be able to tell each other everything—"

"Don't talk like that," Rowan said with a frown. "It's not my secret to tell, okay? He'll understand that. If I were you, I wouldn't tell him before the game... he might beat Jamie up or something—"

"He might do that without knowing!" I sighed and covered my face with my hands. "He deserves to know. Keeping it from him is killing me... but he also can't be upset with me for feeling the way I do about Jamie! I'm finally happy... and I'm so scared he won't be able to see that, or respect that. I don't think Vales is self-conceited, but he'll make it about him... and that'll end up hurting us both."

"Have you thought about when a good time would be to tell him?" Rowan spoke up after a couple moments of silence. "I know I told you that you should wait, and I still think that's the best idea... I was just wondering if you've thought about it."

"I can't think of a good time to tell him. He's never just going to be okay with it, you know? Jesus... I thought about just going for it this morning, when he was telling me about you. Then I thought... maybe I could tell him after the game. But it depends who wins... if North won and I decided to tell him, he'd never forgive me." I started to shake my head as I thought about my impossible situation and Rowan sighed as she laid beside me. "This is sort of random, but... would you maybe want to hang out with Jamie tomorrow?"

"What?" Rowan asked, taken aback.

"I want your opinion on if Vales would like him! I think if they could get over this stupid basketball thing, that they'd be really good friends... but if that's not true, I might just keep Jamie a secret forever. If you hung out with us for a little while, then you could tell me what you think."

"Ellie... I would love to," Rowan said, nodding her head. "But..."

"You don't want to keep that from Vales?" I asked her and she bit her lower lip gently. "That's okay—"