Hold me // Two

IV.

Poppy's POV// trigger warning - mentioning of abuse and rape, violence

The minute I stepped outside of the building the sunrays hit my body. Happy to feel the warmth of the sun again, I sighed. Bullet walked a little further to a playground. Quietly I followed him through the lot, listening to the sound my shoes, well my borrowed shoes, made in the snow. I smiled at myself, I haven't been that jolly for a long time. The man in front of me pointed to a set of swings and wandered over there, cleaning them off of the glistening white. He dried the swings with his sleeve and gestured for me to sit down. Smiling at him, I took the offer and sat down. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the sun, warming up my body and my soul. "You look happy.", he said, standing behind me and pushing my swing a little. "Well, I am. Haven't seen the sun or matter of fact the snow in years." Bullet didn't respond at my words, but I felt him tensing up, so I turned around on the swing. Facing him, I saw him deep in thoughts. Knowing that they start asking uncomfortable questions sooner or later, I decided to be honest with Bullet. Somehow I trusted him, even though I knew him less than 24 hours. "I see you're overthinking. What's on your mind?", I asked gently.  Bullet looked at me, his eyes focused on my face. "I don't want to put pressure on you." "You don't. You deserve some answers, though. You guys helped me, I am in your debts forever." He shook his head no. "Nope, you're not. I just can't wrap my mind around who could do that to an innocent kid? You deserved better. Nothing of this shit you've been through." I locked my eyes with his. "Thank you." Bullet smiled shyly. He was kind of cute, even with his big bad biker appearance. "Can I ask you something?" "Of course." "How did you escape?" Swallowing hard, I averted my eyes. "The men came twice a day. Sometimes just one, other times two of them. I just had to wait until only one of them came. I hid a spoon and a wooden chairleg from them. I-I... It was getting dark outside, I could tell that because the light was fading in my chamber. They came everyday at the same time. Always in the twilight of the day. The guy who was on duty, his name was George. He was nice to me. He sneaked in chocolate and freshly baked goods. He used to talk to me. I...", my voice broke and I looked at my hands. Bullet came closer and laid his hand on my shoulder. "What happened?", he asked calmly. "George... he brought me food. He had some Italian Cantuccini with him. I like the taste of them. He smiled at me and told me he was here alone and he has finally some time to talk to me again. When he sat down at the table, I took my chance...oh god...", I sobbed. Bullet held me close. "It's okay Poppy..." "No! I killed him! He never laid a hand on me, he was actually nice to me and I went on and killed him!" Waves of guilt and fear hit me and I cried loudly into Bullets side. Bullet didn't say anything, he just held me tightly and stroked my back. "I... I asked him everytime we were alone, if he could help me to get out. He always said with fear in his eyes, that he can't do that, because they will go after his family. He was held captive - just like me. He was an innocent man and I... I..." Bullet pulled me up from the swing and hugged me. "Darling, you had to do it, or else you couldn't be free. Don't feel to guilty about it.. are you sure he is dead? Maybe he survived..." I shook my head no. "I stabbed him, Tommy. He told me to run. He actually smiled at me... he wasn't angry or sad. He smiled at me and told me to be a good girl and run. Run away for the both of us. Then he fell to the floor and his breathing stopped. There was so much blood... I am a murderer..." I sobbed into Bullets chest, soaking his sweatshirt jacket with my tears. The guy who embraced me, pulled me closer to him and rested his chin on my head.  
"I am so sorry that you had to live through that... I really am. But I promise to you, you never gonna suffer like this anymore. I, uhm, I mean, we, the club will take care of you."

We stood like that for a long time, holding each other, me crying in his arms. The beating of his heart, his voice and his hands still stroking my back, soothed me down and I grew calmer with every minute.
"I know you love being outside, but I guess we better get back inside again... it's kind of cold outside in wet clothes...", he smirked suddenly.
I pulled away and saw his wet clothes sticking to his chest. "Oh no... yes... let's head back inside... I am sorry about your jacket..." "Don't worry about that. Better like this, because bottling up shit isn't good for anyone." Bullet smiled at me and took my hand in his. "Come. Let's get you a drink." "A drink?" "Fuck... uhm.. sorry I forgot you're not used to grownup fun... you ever drank something alcoholic?" I shook my head no. "Well then, be my guest and we'll see what you favor."
Hand in hand we walked back through the compound, when the door opened. Lilian stood in the doorway, obviously waiting for us. She send me a crooked smile, before she spotted our intertwined hands. "You two getting along, huh?" "Yeah. We do.", Bullet answered coolly. I felt the sudden urge to tell Lilian what happened earlier. "I had a breakdown, he was here for me." Lilian looked up at Bullet and nodded. "Yeah, I guessed something like that. You ok now?" "Better, yes. Okay? Not really.", I whispered. Bullet squeezed my hand gently. "Time will help, Poppy, trust me. And I am always there to listen." He let go of my hand and laid his arm around my shoulders. "Lilian, if you don't mind, we both want to warm up now." "Sure, go ahead you two." She stepped aside from the doorway and let us walk through. I could sense she was kind of angry. I didn't know why  because in my eyes we didn't do something wrong. When we were inside and Bullet led me to the bar I leaned closer to him. "What did we do to upset her?", I asked him in a hushed tone.  "She's a bitch. She thinks I am using you, she thinks I would use you for a good lay and leave you then. Not going to happen though." "I honestly don't know what you've just said..." "Oh... maybe it is better that way...", he grinned at me.

Bullet's POV

She was so innocent. She didn't get half of the stuff I was saying, because she wasn't used to it. Then a thought came to my mind. "Poppy?" "Yes?" "I don't want to pressure you, but did anyone touch you?" "Yes, they punched and smacked me sometimes. I had a few bruises." "Dammit... really? Shit... but... uhm... let me rephrase that question... did they touch your... uhm... ladyparts?" Poppy's eyes went wide and she shuddered. "Uhm... some men tried. But they never went through with it. But once." My blood started to boil and I loosened my grip on her a tad bit. "Did they force you into sex?" I heard Poppy swallow. "Yes, once. It was the man who captured me. He told me it is to make me legally an adult.", she whispered and her cheeks grew red. Anger and hatred took a harsh grip of me and I lashed out. I completely saw red. With a loud yell I threw all the bottles and glasses of the bar. I didn't thought that it might frighten Poppy, I just had to vent my pain and anger. She fucking got raped!
Everyone including Poppy ducked out and I started punching the wall until my knuckles left bloodied traces on the stone. "What the... BULLET! STOP THIS SHIT!" King and Sarge came over, shocked at my fit of craziness.  Sarge shook me out of my trance and smacked my cheek. "Calm the fuck down brother! Poppy is scared man!" I didn't realize it until now, but hot tears ran down my face. "Sarge, her abductors hit her, they abused her! Poppy got raped!", I croaked out. Sarge looked at me in disbelief. "Well fuck me...", he said quietly and turned to King who stood there with his mouth agape. "We need to find out who they are." I nodded and looked around in the common area. Almost everyone was there and was looking at me. I usually was the calm one of the pack, but this was too much even for me. My eyes searched for Poppy. "Shit... where is she?" Lilian pointed to a table. Poppy cowered underneath it, her arms around her legs. Her big orbs looking frantically at me.
Quickly I made my way over to her and crouched down on her level. "I am sorry Poppy. I didn't mean to scare you... " Silently we looked at each other and I held out my hand for her. She needs to know that I would never harm her. "I promised I take care of you. Let me show you how real men treat women. I really am sorry.", I whispered to her, so only she could hear me. She took my hand in hers, but remained seated under the table. "You're bleeding.", she said and examined my swollen hand.
"Would you mind coming out there? I don't fit there with you and I can tell I made you scared. Please, Poppy?" Slowly she crawled out from underneath the table and stood up, still coy and shy.
She looked at me. "Were you angry at me?", she whispered. I shook my head no. "No, never. I was angry this happened to you. None of this is your fault."
Obviously Poppy didn't need more assurance, because she jumped into my arms and hugged me, crying silently. "Shall I take you to your room?", I asked quietly. "Don't care, as long as you stay with me, please." I nodded and cradled her in my arms, walking into the hallway with her.
My brothers watched the whole scenery and murmured behind my back. I knew they had questions, and by that I mean a hell of a lot questions. But first I had to take care of this shy kitten in my arms.