the pale and the dimpled ;; mashton

forty-two // michael

//an: warning: this might be /slightly/ graphic for some people so when it goes to italics i suggest you stop reading until the last an.//

"Mikey, Mikey, slow down," Ashton said in my ear as I left kisses down his neck.

"But Ash I really want to just stuff myself up your-"

"What drugs did Nanie give you this morning?!" He giggled, pushing me back a bit after leaving a long kiss on my lips. "God, Michael."

"I don't like when you call me Michael," I pouted. "I like it when you say it but ewewewewew it's disgusting."

Ashton laughed, and it was joyous and happy and beautiful and wow did I love it more and more everyday.

"Okay, Mikey," He said, his laughs dying down. "You know, you're really pretty." Ashton whispered, stroking the side of my face with the back of my hand.

"I think you're prettier." I told him, stepping closer so our chests touched again.

"Mike-"

"Dammit Ash, just take a compliment for once."

"Okay," He smiled, before crashing our lips together again.

The kiss was heated and sloppy but dear god were the moths in my stomach (because moths are more punk rock than butterflies) ever so real.

"You know I love you right?" I mutter against his lips, biting down slightly on his lip. "And I hope I always will."

Ashton didn't answer but instead kissed me back harder, though not hard enough to enforce what had been happening before. "I love you too." He whispered.

For moments we just stood there in the silence and darkness of each other, stealing kisses every now and then. I let my fingers stay in his belt loops while his hands traced circles on my shoulders and it was quiet and lovely and perfect.

"We should get out now," I said when I could tell the warning bell was about to ring. "I actually have to go to History next; test today."

Ashton mutely nodded, pressing our lips together once more. "Go ace it for me, babe. Who knows, you might get a surprise later if you do." He winked, before leaving the small closet, leaving me alone as kids began to flood the hallways.

Yet I couldn't help bringing a hand to my lips as I left too.

//

Here's a tip for people with PTSD:

Don't close your eyes in class.

Because when you do, the nightmare begins.

Chemistry; the one class I found a little less tangible just because Ashton was my partner. But this one class where we had to "focus on our senses" was almost the cause of my destruction.

(That's a bit of an over exaggeration but hey, I didn't take Drama in year one for three months for nothing.)

"Okay, so I think for this one you need to close your eyes and smell the item before identifying it," Ashton read the instructions on the small bag carefully, his cute little nerd glasses perched on his nose.

"You're adorable. And it sounds like he's trying to get us high," I pointed out, which simply led to him rolling his eyes.

"Just close your eyes and smell it."

I did as told, closing my eyes.

I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And scream.

My eyes flew open and suddenly I wasn't in a lab anymore; I was in my old house, my first house, when mum and dad couldn't afford the one we have now. I was seven or six, barely young enough to remember this. Yet right now I did.

I could feel myself walking down the stairs again, but it was as if I was watching a movie on rewind; everything was weird.

My small seven year old body hid behind the wall, clad in blue superhero pyjamas and clutching Daniel. I watched, horrified, as my dad (drunk off his ass) talked horribly to my mother.

"You are nothing!" He yelled, spit and alcohol flying out of his mouth. "For all I care, you can go die! You should've never been born, much less given birth to that - that - thing! An abomination!"

"He's not a thing, he's your son!" My mother, leaning on the dining table yelled back, trying to defend herself from a grown, drunken man.

And then he hit her.

I remember watching her fall, seeing the red handprint on her cheek. Hearing the sobs and smelling the metallic scent of blood--bloodbloodbloodblood.

Then there was screaming.

And crying.

And yelling.

And pleading.

And sirens.

And people.

And screaming.

And crying.

And nothing.

//an

okay so first things first if you didn't notice these are kind of divided into parts so like Luke was Thursday and today (Michael) is Friday and Calum will have a bit of Friday but mostly Saturday and then well Ashton will be all over the place bc yeah :)

oMG GS THYSM FOR 16K HOW THE HELL DO YALL READ SO FAST AND Y DO U EVEN LIKE THIS BOOK LMAO

also good news!!!

we got our report cards Friday and I made honour roll,,,!! yay,,!!!

bye guys i love u so much.//