Brutally Beautiful.

Breathe.

Braids.

Reminds me of the cold mornings, sipping on my hot tea while mom braids my hair for school, she loved it, and I missed her so much, it hurts.

I sat in a corner of the dark room looking at the unseen horizon in front of my swollen eyes, lacing my fingers between my hair trying to remind myself how my mom used to do it. Feel like everythings alright.

Thinking of her makes my heartache, and brings tears to my eyes. How could she ever forget about me? Stopped searching? Why did she give up so fast? Does she think I'm dead? Or was that masochist right? She didn't care about me as much as I thought she does?

Am I no one?

I miss my home

Home.

How strange and abandoned it sounds from my mouth.

I don't have a home anymore, and family? What is left of me? I'm starting to lose my mind completely.

Crying seemed like the only thing I am capable of doing at this given moment, braid my bloody hair and cry.

I cried till my eyes itch and hurt.

Suddenly the door had been opened and a can swing in and stopped at the tip of my toes, I carried it, and stared at it feeling sick to my stomach.

Cheeries, again.

Actually everyday.

For four months strict they've been feeding me with cheeries, or dried cherries.

Seems like todays going to be a long day then.

I hold the can in my hands and stared at it for a long time. I didn't feel like eating, at all, but I know if I want to stay alive I had to eat.

Now is the question; do I want to stay alive?

I screwed off the can and ate the whole content of it.

And threw up. Seems like my stomach won't accept any food from the amount of brutal abuses I've been through. Not good. I start gasping as it took so much energy to throw it up.

One of the bastards who they call, 'Luke' came in laughing as he felt pleased watching me suffer. All of them did.

He crouched in front of me smiling and nodding his head like a maniac observing me from head to toe he stroked my head stared into my eyes like a psychopath. Which they all obviously are.

As his green toxic eyes pierced my dark once his face expression changed into a mad, irritated figure I almost jumped from the horror which have been dancing in my eyes since very long time.

He looked at my chest, which was exposed, that's when I've realized a knife in his hand, playing with it like its a harmless toy.

He pressed it delicately yet hard enough to make a cut on my cheek and slit it down to my jaw, went to my throat, collarbone, and then the center of my chest, my body starts responding to its sore bruises and cuts I began to shiver.

He kept drawing around my chest, evil dancing on his lips.

I've got so used to the pain that I didn't feel when he stopped.

My blood drop from cheeks to my neck, he licked my jaw line, his touch hurts more than the knife itself.

"Please, stop." I cried in despair.

"Huh?" He stopped and looked at me again.

"Why won't you just kill me if you're not planning to free me anytime soon?" My throat began to burn.

"Because that would be too easy, " he said in a deep serious tone. "And where would be the whole fun, hm?" He laughed like a maniac twirling around the room.

He was about to leave. I sigh. He turned around once again with a huge grin on his face, run to me like a child and leaned in to kiss me, I turned my head.

"Look at me." he said, his lips forming a duck face.

I wouldn't turn my head anytime.

"LOOK AT ME!" he yelled, so loud my eardrums jumped.

I kept my head still.

"LOOK AT ME, BITCH!" He punched me on my face so hard, I lost my control and fell on my side.

He stepped closer to me, I couldn't see his face well as the room was dark, "So that is how you want to play, hm?" He said loud in his raspy voice. "Okay." he whispered.

With a relief on my face I keep lying on the floor like a defenseless dog, and then I gasped out of pain. Hard boots start kicking the living shit out of me so hard. I was so sick and tired of this I wanted to die so badly at that moment.

"You fucking bitch" He mumbled with each kick he greets me with. "You don't just turn your face away from me." he kicked my head.

Once.

Breathe, Hailey.

Twice.

You have to get through it.

Trice.

Just breathe.

Fourfold.

Don't cry, don't.

Quince.

Don't.