Guilty Pleasure

Page 70

When I come to I'm in Julie and Shannon's room. I hear Shannon and Jared speaking just above a whisper. I hear Jared's voice, part of me wants to hold on to him for dear life the other wants to push him away and scream at the top of my lungs. I feel Julie work the compress onto my forehead my eyes flutter open Julie:"Hey bug how you feeling?" Truth my heart was shattered me:"ok I guess" Jared:"Nina, I'm here baby, I'm here" he holds me close kissing my forehead my cheek, he whispers in my ear "I love you" tears roll down my cheeks. I look at Jared his eyes are red so is his nose, he's been crying Me:"How could you" Shannon takes my hand to his lips then his cheek "What do you remember?" I keep my eyes on Jared, Me:"She touched you......you let her put her filthy hands on you" Jared's eyes fill with tears again Jared:" No!!!!!!! Nina, baby I never touched her. Nothing happened!!!!" Me:"I saw her, she was on her knees, she was...... You ........." I remember what I saw, Jared's shirt was off his pants were undone she was .......... and I cry at the memory but I also remember something else they're arguing he has his hands wrapped around her wrists he pushes her back and she lurches forward as the vase nearly grazes her back. I look at his shirt, I remember standing in front of him realizing he's fully dressed and his belt being in place. God I'm so confused. S:"What is it baby, what do you see?" Julie:"Love bug look at me....... talk to me mama what did you see?" She's been crying too I throw my arms around her and I begin to sob. Julie:"Can you give us a minute" Jared:"I'm not leaving her!" Shannon squeezes Jared's shoulder S:"It's ok Jay let's just give them some space" Jared looks at Shannon his eyes pleading, he looks at Julie she smiles weakly and with a gentle nod whispers "it's ok" he strokes my hair, kisses my cheek and whispers in my ear "I love you" and they step out into the balcony.

Julie:"Shhh it's ok mama, talk to me" I'm so confused Me:"She touched him, she touched my Jared!!!" Julie:"Are you sure love bug?" Me:"Yes, no, I don't know" she wiped my tears and moved random strands of hair out of my face Julie:"Just now when Jared was here you we're looking at his clothes funny, do you remember why?" I think about it for a few seconds Me:"I'm so fucken confused!!!!! I came down the hallway the door was open I heard voices she was there I went in....... his shirt was off his pants were undone she was........" I start sobbing ".......she was...... Sucking him off and he was enjoying it he looked at me and said Sorry Babe!!!!" Julie holds me close Jared hears me and comes back in the room "Baby that never happened, you have to believe me!" I look up at him and focus on his shirt she follows my gaze to his shirt "What is it mama?" The vase, I threw the vase she moved out of the way......" to Jared "you were dressed your belt was buckled ........but....how?" Jared:"Sweet angel nothing happened, she came on to me but nothing happened, I pushed her back and she lurched forward when you threw the vase, remind me not to piss you off, you barely missed her." I smile weakly at him Me:"Really?" Jared:"Yeah, try aiming a little higher next time" I look at him as if to say "next time really?" I look at Shannon then back at him Me:"Where is she?" S:"She's gone sweetie, she won't hurt you anymore" I look at him then back at Jared, wait!!!! What????? Jared:"Don't worry she's still breathing" He caresses my cheek with the back of his hand, instinctively I lean in to his touch. I want to believe him but my heart aches and I'm still so confused.

I've been sleeping off and on Jared has never left my side. Julie's dozing peacefully in Shannon's arms on the couch. It's getting late and Shannon's hungry or so Jared thought. S:"Jay why don't we go get something to eat, we haven't had anything to eat since breakfast and neither have the girls" Jared:"Nina's running on empty" he strokes my hair and kisses my forehead and my cheek. I stir at his touch J:"Hey sleepy head" Me:"Hey" J:"You hungry baby?" Me:"A little" J:"You need to eat something baby you're stomach is empty" S:"He's right sweetie, you should eat something" Me:"Yeah ok I guess. Umm you ordering room service?" S:"No actually there's a place downstairs we've been wanting to try" Jared looks at Shannon like what are you talking about? "They even have a small vegan menu for Jared's more discerning palette" J:"God you make me sound like food snob" S:"You are!!!" I couldn't help but giggle, I just loved the way their faces lit up. I guess they were more worried about me than I thought. Shannon wakes up Julie "Baby, Jared and I are gonna go get some food, can you take care of Nina till we get back?" Julie:"Sure of course" panic sets in and I turn to Jared Me:"Wait you're going?" Jared:"It's just for a little bit baby I'll be right back." For the first since I came to I throw my arms around Jared and hold on for dear life Me:"Please don't go, stay with me" Jared:"Baby look at me...... I'll be right back. Besides what trouble can I possibly get myself into with Shannon tagging along?" I look at Shannon my eyes pleading S:"It's ok sweetie I'll bring him right back I promise besides I could use two extra hands" I look at Jared again "Don't take too long" Jared:"I love you" Me:"I love you more" I look at Shannon Me:"She's gone right?" Leah really hurt her, Shannon and Jared knew Nina wouldn't feel safe until they were back in L.A. S:"Nina, baby, I promise you she'll never hurt you again" Julie:"It's ok love bug, it's just food they'll be right back." Me:"Ok, please hurry" Jared:"We will baby, I promise"