Suicide hotline

Chapter 62: Empty

Song: Atlas: Touch - Sleeping At Last

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Hope's POV:

I awoke cold and alone.

My body halfway under the covers and half out. It had been several months since Eli had passed, Autumn was now upon us, the cool weather seeping in.

I still felt numb.

I can't remember the last time I saw anyone except Chance. It was like it was a silent agreement that after the funeral we would no longer see each other, as if it would help with the pain.

It did not.

It almost seemed that it hurt even more.

No one had gotten any kind of closure, especially Nieta or Wesley.

Even Chance refused to talk about Eli, which only made matters worse because Chance is the type of person who needs to talk about what is bothering him in order to relax and find peace.

Not being able to talk about Eli must've been weighing him down dramatically and ceasing any kind of peace within him.

Don't get me wrong, I've tried getting him to talk about Eli. I've tried every tactic in the book but nothing seems to work.

Trying to get him to talk about his feelings and the way everything has affected him wasn't so easy, since anytime I even began to open my mouth it's as if his ears close and he ignores anything I'll say.

He becomes extremely aggressive and hostile. He's been very short tempered, snapping at me with every chance that he got.

This just lead me to shut off and not try and speak to him anymore.

It's the safest way to keep him from getting angry at me.

I don't want to admit this but I feel as though our relationship is deteriorating and our love is fading. I've felt like that as soon as I saw Eli exchanging with those thugs.

Suddenly, I heard heavy footsteps and my heartbeat quickened. I quickly closed my eyes and turned my head slightly, acting as if I was sleeping.

The footsteps got to the door, I saw the shadow leering under. My heart quivered.

It paused, the door slightly creaking. And then suddenly the footsteps left, walking in the different direction.

And that was when I lost it and broke down.

Loud heavy sobs, I tried to quiet myself but I couldn't help it. All of the build up, the heart ache and the loss of love has just been so overwhelming that I couldn't help it.

All I wanted was to be held.

•

I had once again awoken, my tear stained face now dry and aching. I was still alone. What a shocker.

I stared at the window where Leo sat happily perched on the window sill. He licked at his paw and gracefully rubbed his head.

I then looked out the window to see a dark, gloomy sky. Lightning crackled and Leo jumped, quickly darting out of the room.

I got up and decided I needed to shower and to wash my hair before the storm got here. I had been lacking personal hygiene for a while now, along with everything else.

I made my way over to Chances bathroom where I opened the door and stepped inside. The room was freezing, just like every other room in this cold damned house.