Decalcomania

Chapter seven - pt1

        Somewhere along the road, I will see you again -

One month, it has been one month since he walked out of the door and never came back. He turned his back on me after he said all those words, harsh words. I'm not mad at him, I'm really not, I just miss him, and the fact that I don't know where is he and what is happening with him, is breaking my heart and suffocating me. I looked at the dirty black wall in front of me, darkness surrounding me and embracing me into its arms, again, just like every single time. The thing that happened that day was like getting hit by a train, and the only difference is that it actually didn't hurt, not even a little, because I knew that was the obvious truth but I ignored it, for how long? Believe me I can't count anymore. These nightmares are still chasing me, like a never ending chain, keep getting longer and longer. Longer enough to choke me and get the worst out of me, and it did, really, got the worst out of me.

the whistles of the wind gusting through the street, notifying the agog night owls that a blustery winter is coming their way, to withdraw their disappointments and bewilderments, and to deliver the remedy they were starving for; the trees are finally letting go of their old leaves and allowing new ones to sprout, the session is here to take the leafs that once held much pain and beauty, if only my worries can fade away like these falling leaves, with the splash of charm and the promise of never coming back. Despairingly staring from the small window at a flock of birds heading south, searching for a place warmer for them to survive, I wish I had the opportunity to fly too, to search for him or maybe hide away from his memory. I wanted to erase everything and stop the pain, the pain of seeing his ghost everywhere, he is everywhere, because he is inside me.

His suffocating touches on me, bringing back the old memories and the heartache, the feeling of disappointment, anger, sorrow and gloom. It became a habit for them to leave just like that, first my parents and now him. I still remember the day I was left alone on that abandoned road, as I ran after him, begging for him to stop, but he never did. The fingerprints of the cold raindrops still burn my skin every single night, leaving traces of shame to the sun rise, can't be washed and can't be recovered, like an ugly tattoo stuck on me for a lifetime.

thunder rumbled in the distance and a bolt of lightning cracked the midnight dark sky into pieces, I could tell that rain was threatening to fall as the trees began to creak and moan, sending waves of fear and disbelief into my aching body, and as expected, Sheets of water started pouring from the dark sky, soaked clothes, unpaved paths awash with mud and smell of the rain soaked soil made my heart beat faster than a heavy metal drummer. And then, I saw her, sitting in the corner of the room, staring back at me, a little girl, a little me. The scent of her Nenuso lingering on my nose and her sing-song voice fastened in my ears. There still a little bit of her face I can't forget, her chubby pinkish-red cheeks, butterscotch grimy hair, pouty chapped lips, gleaming teeth and hazel rounded eyes. I can see her sitting there, holding her dirty dressed doll and glaring at me blankly and probably judging me with her innocent smile. I smiled back, feeling tears gather on my eyes but they never came out, I didn't want them to, I never allowed them to.

"Room 418, you have visitors!" the lady harshly said, room 418, I laughed bitterly.

I walked side to side with her, along the dark hallway, feeling my feet dragging me forcefully. And I still hoped, it is him who came to see me.

I entered the small room optimistically, my eyes searching for him but never found him, instead, I saw someone else, Professor and Sophia, sitting next to each other on the table, looking at me with concern and pity. I smiled and they smiled back, fake smiles, no matter how much they tried to hide it but they weren't happy to see me here.

Sophia stood up and walked up to me, to embrace me on her arms but the police lady stopped her on her track. Sophia rolled her eyes and sat back on the chair, and I followed along, sitting before them.

"How are you?" Professor asked,

"I'm fine!" I answered weakly, maybe I wasn't really fine, but I was glad to see them free.

The day Alvin disappeared, I went to the police station, threw myself on the jail in order for my team to be released. He did what he wanted and I did the same, we are even now.

"We are working on your case, don't worry, you won't stay here for so long!" Sophia said

"Do you know anything about him?" I softly asked, hoping to get the answer I wanted, but they shook their head both, "he is nowhere to be found!" Professor said.

"We have good news!" Sophia chuckled, trying to lighten up the mood, I glanced at them as they held each other's hands, I smiled, real smile this time, they didn't need to say it, I could see it on their eyes. They were in love, and it warmed my heart to know that Sophia could move on from her ex husband and the loss of her daughter, and for professor, he finally had the courage to open his heart to someone else after the death of his wife. They both overcame their fears and struggles. When will I ever have the courage to do it too?

I enjoyed listening to their love story, how I was the reason they met, and the reason they got along. I was informed also that Olivia finally had the courage to confess her feelings to Alexander, and I'm proud of her.