Decalcomania

pt2

Minutes passed, and their time was over, they had to leave me again, alone. They paid their goodbyes and walked out of the door, leaving me sitting on that cold metal chair, waiting for my next visitor, I looked down and waited, more seconds passed and I heard the door swung open again, I looked up and saw Benjamin, wearing his best smile, walked firmly towards me and sat on the chair before me.

"How have you been?" he spoke, and I, again, had the same answer "I'm fine!"

"I think professor and Sophia already informed you that we are working on your case, Alvin's disappearance is helpful for you. I know you won't like what I'm about to say, but we have to do it, we can just say that he forced you to take him out of the asylum!" Benjamin nervously said, I knew he didn't like the idea too, but he just wanted to get me out of here.

"No!" I rejected it, "I will take responsibility on my own actions, I'm the one who kidnapped him!" I said, and he sighed.

"Then, I will see what I can do!" he mumbled.

"How is Noah?" I questioned, "He is doing good. Talking endlessly about you and Alvin, he misses you!" I smiled warmly and recalled my countable memories with that little kid.

"What about her?" I asked again, Benjamin's body shivered at my words and he smiled bitterly, "we transformed her to the psychiatry hospital!" he said.

"I never imagined my mother to be that cruel, I couldn't believe my ears when I heard those words coming out of her mouth, how could she do that to her son, my brother." He sadly spat

"I have always thought she was my hero. After our father left us, she was the only one who took care of me, supported me and patted my head when I needed!" he faked a smile, "I even trusted her with Noah, what if she hurt him?"

"But you know what bothers me the most? – the fact that I never checked on my brother for ten years because I thought he was at fault, I left him alone when he needed me the most, I was supposed to protect him but just like her, I turned my back on him!"

"But he loves you!" I whispered, of course, Alvin loved Benjamin so much even though he never mentioned it, I could still see it on his eyes.

"I'm searching for him, Elyse!" he suddenly said, "and I promise to find him!"

"Time is up!" the lady shouted, Benjamin nodded and stood up "I will get you out of here!" he smiled and walked out of the door, "thank you" I whispered, I felt grateful to hear what he said, not the getting me out of here part, but the finding him part.

"The last visitor!" she shouted again, who would it be? I wondered to myself, nobody came in mind, all the people I know already came.

I eagerly looked at the door and waited for the person to get in, and as soon as my eyes met those eyes, my jaw dropped and my brain stopped functioning for a second. She walked slowly towards the table, the sound of her heels bringing back the memories of those unwanted days. She sat on the chair and placed a warm smile on her lips, "hey again!" she said

I couldn't believe my eyes, I never expected to meet her again, in fact, I never expected her to visit me, Leyla.

"You must be surprised!" she chuckled, "But don't worry, I just came here to talk to you, to say the things that I was supposed to say before!"

"I'm sorry!" she uttered, "for both Alvin and you!"

"I never meant to hurt him that bad, I just loved him so much and I wanted him to feel the same, I hated the fact that he rejected me, threw me away and sometimes ended up hurting me. I tried to help him. I begged the administration for new medicines and injections to stop his anxiety attacks, to calm his alters and to help him sleep peacefully, they rejected, they didn't want to give me the medicines unless I do what they wanted, and you are smart enough to know what they wanted from a lady like me. For him, I was ready to give it, and I did, I gave myself to them in order to get the medicines. But I got fooled instead, the next morning, they kicked me out of the office and I never heard from them again. I couldn't trust anyone with Alvin, all the female nurses were attracted to him and I hated it, I was obsessed with him and I was afraid he would like any of them, for this, I had to kick them all out." She continued

"I called my sister, Sophia, the only person I trusted. I wanted her to keep an eye on him, I knew she wouldn't be attracted to him since she loved her husband so much. But she betrayed me, tried to set him free and take him away from me. anger blinded me, and I could no more know what's right and what wrong, I got my revenge, locked her on that room and I was the reason her husband left her!" she chuckled bitterly as tears poured down her cheeks.

"His love turned me into somebody I'm not, he became like a drug to me, I had to touch him, I had to put my hands on him. I thought, maybe, he would feel my love then!"

"Then, you came along, Elyse, the girl who could change him in matters of days only, you could do what I failed to do in years. The way his eyes searched for you, the way his body relaxed immediately when I mention your name, or the way he beat me to save you that night!" she sobbed,

"I saw it, I saw the way he hugged you, he cherished you. I wanted him to feel the same for me!"

We ended up both crying. I never imagined I will one day pity this woman, the woman who looked unbreakable, she is now shattering in front of me."He will come back for you, Elyse, he just needs time!" Leyla said, I trusted her words for the first time.

Now, I can see through everyone's view, how each one of them thought and felt about one another. See, how, we, humans never take time to understand others, we only see through the surface, we only see what we want to see. We are so superficial and narrowed, hypocrite and liars. We are trapped on our own misunderstandings, believing what our sick minds throw on us, we come to see the truth very late, when nothing is left and the hearts are already broken.

"I will resign from that asylum and leave the country!" she smiled, "I think I need to search for myself, I do realize, I lost the pure diamonds along the road, my sister, my family and the man who loved me, Stephan. I thought it would be easy for me to move without extra weight, but foolish of me, the only extra weight I needed to lose, was the one I was holding on to. I thought, maybe I can go back and search for them, find them, cherish them fondly this time. But I know I'm late, in fact, too late to even think about it anymore. I think, that's how the heavens wanted to punish me, flash the truth in front of my eyes and let me drown in my own guilty regrets. I deserve it, I really do, but I never wanted to admit. I excused myself over and over again, but the truth never changed, it was always the same. As I'm telling you this now, my mind flashed on one of the diamonds that I was supposed to cherish but didn't, Sophia, I met her before I come here, she looks beautiful, shiny and full of life, different than I actually remember, it took me few seconds of looking at her to realize, I was the one who kept her in the dark, I was the one who hid the beauty of her heart, but now, when I released her, I see how much of a good thing I have done by letting go. My guilt felt at ease, my heart calmed a little, satisfied at the painful truth, I lost my diamonds in the journey of looking for pearls. Do I wish to go back in time? I do, every single second of my breath, and will I be able? Never, the road back there is way too impossible, now, I know that I'm never going to be the same again, today is the day I realized how foolish I was, and how different I will be." She wisely said, I couldn't help but smile at her bravery, she is indeed a strong woman, and I wanted to be like her, strong.

"I think you should give Stephan a shot!" I chuckled, she giggled too and shook her head, "I don't think he wants to see me anymore!"

"He loves you, no matter what, I know he still loves you!" I spoke, feeling confident about what I said, because I know, once you truly love someone, you can never hate them, no matter how hard you try and no matter how bad they hurt you.

"Do you think I should call him?" she asked

"Go for it, he will be there waiting for you!" I smiled warmly and she returned the smile.

"Time is up!" the lady shouted and Leyla and I stood up, she waved goodbye and left the room.