Stonehearts 6: Alexandrite

Thirty Five

The thing with Sam is slowly taking a toll on us. It's been five months of going to and forth and I know Gio's getting frustrated more and more each day but still chooses to be supportive of Clyde.

He hated everything that's happening. I am starting to miss important events because I have to be with Clyde and Sam, since Clyde refuses to go alone.

I know there's a building protest in his throat but dare not speak of it. Because he loves Clyde, and he knows this is important to him.

I just don't know how more he can take before he finally loses it and throw a mammoth fit. I was actually amazed on how he can keep cool with all the shit that has been flying around us.

"I'm really sorry, I can't go. Feeling ko nga nagtatampo na si Q sa'kin. She didn't reply to my texts."

Gio looked at me and smiled, but it doesn't reach his eyes. He's been smiling like this a lot lately. "I know, wifey. Marina's gonna get over it eventually. Don't worry about her." He uttered in reassurance.

We both know Q's gonna have my ass for the next years for not going to her rehearsal dinner. Also, because I gave her a very vague reason why we can't go. But that's the least of my concern. Right now, I have to start putting band aids over the wounds this crazy roller coaster ride has given our relationship.

"Hubby, are you still okay with everything?"

He suddenly sat and rested his back against the headboard of our bed. I guess, five am isn't the best time to be talking about this.

"I'm sorry, it's okay if you don't want to answer." I said retracting.

He turned his head to look at me before playing with my bed hair. "I actually don't know, but what I know is I have to keep doing this for our son. It sucks not knowing when this will end, five months felt like years when there's someone I am obliged to share you both with. But when I look at you, at Clyde, I feel the emotional exhaustion disappearing. That in the long run, this will all be worth it."

He suddenly paused, lost in his own thoughts.

"If you're going to ask me now if I am happy with our arrangement, I'm going to say no. I am angry at the situation because I have no power over it. When Sam asked for a part in Clyde's life, I never thought he's going to request some part of yours too. I wasn't ready for that. What makes me more frustrated is that I can't do anything. My chase for you, my hunt for you, my battles in winning you, suddenly deemed useless. Because even if you are here, naked in my bed and curled on my side, I feel like you aren't completely mine. And that hits me right where it hurts."

I don't know what to say. My heart breaks for the both of us. They may think that I am the one most affected by this, but the truth is Gio takes all the baggage. Siya ang laging naiiwan sa bahay naghihintay sa pag-uwi namin ni Clyde kapag nagpupunta kami kay Sam. Siya rin ang laging umuunawa kapag hindi kami pwede ni Clyde magpunta sa mga espesyal na okasyon dahil kay Sam.

One time, I tried talking to Sam because his grandmother's birthday collided with the Gala on one of the hotels Gio handles. He activated the 'sana pagbigyan niyo na ako kasi first time maka-attend ni Clyde ng birthday ni Lola. She's 81 and not getting any younger' card. Wala na kaming laban, Gio chose not to push it. Parehas din kasi kaming natatakot na baka dalhin ito ni Sam sa korte.

There's really not much of a choice but to give Sam what he wants.

The heavy cloud hung over us as silence dominated our room. I looked over Gio who's still lost in his own mind. His face forlorn.

I sat up and placed my hand in his cheek to him look at me. His eyes were lost the flame and spark I fell in love with.

"Gio....I am yours. Forever, yours.." then I closed in the space between us for a kiss.