Stonehearts 7: Ruby

Four

It's a lie if I told you the inner me didn't just do a happy dance when I heard him say those words to me. I was shocked stupid that I wasn't even able to form coherent words to reply.

He let out a nervous laugh, "Crazy, isn't it?"

Crazy for you? Yes, I am.

Giving myself more seconds to calm my unruly heart, I smiled at him and probed the subject more.

"Akala ko kasi girlfriend mo. Sabi mo kasi priority mo."

A question disguised as a statement! Way to go, Arcie!

Napa-iling siya, "I wish she was, though."

And my daydreaming was crushed. Aly's gonna kill me for letting my hopes this high again.

"B-bakit hindi kayo?" Cue the verbal vomit because I can't seem my mouth from spewing more nonsense around.

"Because she isn't ready yet. She's young, two years younger than me, and just set her first foot towards the outside world. She's very fragile and doesn't get to do much on her own. So, being exposed to the corporate world is her new beginning. And I don't want to blow her 'adulting' experience by shoving my feelings on her."

He let out a frustrated sigh after that.

Hindi ko naintidihan. Kung 'yon lang ang problema niya, bakit siya parang pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa?

I bit my lip. God, I think I'm starting to physically feel my heart breaking. I wanted to stop asking, but the way his face looked forlorn. I have the itchy feeling to make him feel better.

I can hear Aly screaming in my mind, telling me to leave the room but my foot seemed to be glued on the floor.

Why am I so weak when it comes to this man?

"Sorry, I don't mean to discredit what you just said but, I don't think that's a hard situation?" I ended my sentence with a question mark to make it less bitchy.

Try falling head over heels in love with someone for years only to find one he's in love with somebody else. You'll definitely realize what is hard.

'That was just the tip of the iceberg." he puffed. "Remember last time, when I mentioned the Pedrialva Corporate Center?"

You don't have to remind me that part. I cried to my mom when I assumed you had a girlfriend.

I nodded my head.

"Well, she works there. My baby's very first job." There was an inkling of pride in his eyes, but it was brief.

Baby.

He calls her baby. Pero hindi sila? How more complicated can this person get?

"I've heard a lot about her new boss straight from her mouth. He was mean, brooding, crude and I think pretty much all the negative adjectives out there. But I can't seem to put my finger around how she's always talking about him. Simula nang pumasok siya doon, all she ever talks about is Ferris Pedrialva." He ended his sentence flat, but I saw his hands fisting on the table.

Boy, he's got it bad. He's freaking jealous of the new guy in this mysterious girl's life and he doesn't even realize.

I pushed aside my feelings and decided to sit in front of him. "Wait lang, you need you backtrack for a bit. Kasi may mga hindi ako ma-gets. Ano ba kayo?"

Pain flashed in his eyes. "Best friends."

"Oh no." I didn't realize I said that one out loud.

"Yup, a real 'oh no'." he agreed.

I cleared my throat, racking my brain to my next words. "Baka naman bukam-bibig niya dahil bago lang para sa kanya?" I offered.

But he quickly shook his head, "I knew Aya for a very long time. That's not her."

Aya. So that's the name. I mentally reminded myself to go snoop around through social media to find a face to the name.

We were silent for a while. Hindi ko magawang sabihin sa kanya na baka naman may gusto 'yong Aya na 'yon sa Ferris na 'yon kaya ganoon ang sitwasyon. Alam kong masasaktan siya. Kahit hindi naman niya sabihin, halatang-halata na in love siya sa best friend niya.

Invalidating my comment earlier. Alam niya pala ang feeling ng magmahal sa taong hindi siya mahal.

If Aly is with right now, she would be the devil on my shoulder shouting me to hurt him just how I am hurting. But I knew better. I will leave the analysis to him.

"Thanks for listening, Rubs. You're really a great friend."

Damn, that stings! I furtively gave my chest a couple of pats to ease the pain.

"G-glad I could help." I was able to spat those words out. He let out a small smile and I know I have to say more. "You know, hindi pa naman huli ang lahat. Kung ikukumpara mo 'yong mayroon kayo ni Aya sa Ferris na 'yon, mas lamang ka. You can use that to your advantage."

He seemed to have studied what I said before giving me a nod. "You're right. Now, I kinda feel bad for losing my temper last night."

I felt his mood shifting. The dark clouds hanging over his head finally dissipated, and he is back in his usual high spirits.

"Dapat talaga, matagal na tayong nagkita ulit. Who knew you would be the clarity I needed?"

I should have found that sweet, but somehow it felt like it had cut deep into me. Felt like a knife slowly sinking in my heart with no remorse.

"O-oo nga, eh." Bulong ko sabay pilit na ngumiti.

He checked his watch and I know that's my cue. My private time with him is over. Plus, I have additional information I have to digest.

Aly is right. Dapat talaga move on na ang nasa isip ko. Hindi 'yong napapabalik-balik ako sa pagpapakatanga sa taong ito.

"Sige na. I'll go ahead, Bryce. Good luck sa'yo at kay Aya." Huling sabi ko saka tuluyang lumabas sa conference room.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nahihingal hanggang sa nakarating ako sa kotse ko. Hindi naman ako tumakbo pero parang pakiramdam ko nanghihina ako.

I dropped my head on the steering wheel. My eyes are starting to water and I don't know what to do.

If this is the love he's found, I can't sabotage that for him. Ako pa. Ako pa na buong pagkatao ko naniniwala na dapat pinaglalaban ang lahat at hindi basta-basta isinusuko.

Ano naman laban ko?

My tears begun to stain small circles on my skirt, as I let all of what I just learn tumble to me like a storm.

I don't have enough choice; I just need to be happy for him.

Tama nga si Aly, kung hindi siya para sa'kin, patay tayo diyan. Dahil pakiramdam ko namatay ako kanina habang nakikinig sa kanya.