Stonehearts 7: Ruby

Five

"Mommy, bakit ganito kasakit?" bulong ko habang umiiyak ako sa bisig ni mom.

I don't actually know how I managed to finish the day without falling apart. I acted normal around everyone. But as soon as I enter our house. My mom knew instantly that something was wrong. All it took was one good look at me, and she wrapped me in her arms and said nothing more.

I am now curled in her arms like a baby, while we both lounge at the couch. The air smelled like burned cooking, but my mom was adamant of not letting me go until I feel slightly okay.

"Kasi nagmamahal ka, Arcie. It should hurt, because if not that's not love at all."

What she said made me cry even more. I was bawling like a newborn in her arms until we heard a loud knock on our door, followed by Aly's loud voice.

"Tita, nandito na po ako para masampal si Arcie." sigaw niya.

Para akong tangang natatawa at naiiyak. Mom gave me a kiss on my forehead before she opened the door for my best friend. Nagmano pa muna ang gaga pero halata namang nagmamadali siyang malapitan ako.

My mom immediately excused herself leaving us two alone.

"Oh, ano? Nakatulog ka nanaman? Kailangan mo bang masampal para magising ka sa katotohanan?" she looked mad, but I know deep down she's hurting for me too.

This is a front, a façade I've memorized her with the length of our friendship. She always tells me that she needs to be the tough one because I'm soft and I needed protection from myself.

Now, I realized what she meant.

I shook my head. The blaze in her eyes simmered, replaced by worry. She sat beside me and enclosed me in a hug.

"Tao ka lang naman kasi, bakit ka ba nagpapakasanto?" sunod niyang ani.

Hindi ko alam kung anong isasagot. Bakit nga ba nagpapaka-martyr ako? Kasi gusto kong ipaglaban? Kasi buong buhay ko alam kong mapait lang ang kapalit ng pagsuko?

Pero hanggang saan ka nga ba lalaban? At kailan mo malalaman kung kailan ka titigil?

"Kasi naman. Asadong-asado ako nang sinabi niyang hindi sila. Hindi ko na naisip na kahit hindi sila, malaki ang chance na mahal niya na 'yong Aya na 'yon."

"Aya?" she echoed.

I nodded my head, sniffing. I buried myself deeper into her comforting hug. "Aya 'yong pangalan ng bestfriend niya. He knows that he's in love with her, and from my observation, he's in too deep for a very long time."

I heard her sighing. "Gosh, for a very smart woman, you're so stupid when it comes to this."

Yeah, can't argue with that. Hindi ko kasi alam bakit parang ang hirap bitiwan ang nararamdaman ko para sa lalaking 'yon. Kung iisipin ko, I've wasted all those years admiring him from afar, wishing that eventually, he and me will meet again, and soon will happen.

I wasn't wrong on the meeting part, but I sure was hell I quote 'stupid' for thinking that we will happen. Am I naïve for hoping that my life would turn into some kind of soap opera? That Bryce will eventually sweep me off my feet?

Aly is right. I am stupid when it comes to him.

"Arcie-bear, I can hear you thinking again. Stop that."

I untangled myself from her and wiped my almost dried tears using the back of my hand. Aly's still looking at me like I'm gonna breakdown again after a few seconds, but I reassured her with a smile.