Bound to You

Chapter 34

When your mother said she was having a dinner party, what she meant was, she was going to invite your ex-fiance over for dinner, and it was going to be the dinner from Hell.

"What do you think you're doing?" I heard you hiss in a low tone to your mother. Marie was currently sitting at the dining room table, while we stood in the kitchen, peeking out at her through the open doorway.

Your mother just rolled her eyes and reached for a tray of cookies, turning toward the doorway. "Dear, you brought Marie into this family. Just because you ended it doesn't mean I have to. She's my friend, and I invited her for dinner." She smiled over at me, stiff and devious. "Perhaps it would be less awkward if she weren't here."

For a second, you just scowled at your mother in a way that told me you were confused by her comment. I wasn't. I knew exactly what she meant.

And then you sputtered and reached for me. "I'm not asking Lena to leave because you have no clue what proper manners look like."

I was afraid for a second that your mother was going to drop the tray in her hands. She let out a loud bark of a laugh. "You think I have bad manners? And what kind of manners pray tell allow you to screw your new hussy against my bedroom wall?"

I sucked in a breath, feeling sick to my stomach. I was fairly certain I was going to be ill all over the island in your mother's kitchen, but I pulled myself together.

"That's it," you said, reaching over to grab onto my wrist. "We're not going to sit here and let you treat us like this." You tugged me toward the door, pulling me out into the dining room.

When you first told me about your mother, I imagined things so much differently from this. I imagined a frail old lady, a kind woman who would smile and offer me tea and pat me on the hand. But your mother was looking at me like she wished she could personally condemn me to the furthest reaches of Hell.

I put my hand over yours, where it was wrapped around my arm. "You don't have to leave," I said. I could leave alone, fly back to Connecticut. I couldn't ask you to leave your family, the mother you were so desperate for me to meet, for me to like.

Marie looked up when we got to her, her eyes alight for a split second before she recognized me, and immediately, I knew that she'd been just as duped as we were. I could only imagine what your mother had told her. Maybe she'd told her that if she showed up, the two of you would get back together. Maybe she told her you wanted her, missed her, were waiting for her.

I felt sick all over again.

"The fuck is she doing here?" Marie demanded, and I had to admit that I was tired of being called she in that tone, like I was a pile of dog shit that needed to be avoided. Neither of us had a chance to answer before Marie's eyes went wide. "Oh fuck me, are you serious? The two of you are...?" She pointed back and forth between us. "Oh, that's fucking rich. She's your girlfriend now, is she? Or is she just a fuck toy?"

I cringed at hearing the words come out of her mouth, not much different from what your mother had said about me. I wanted to close my eyes and shut my ears and disappear from this place.

You turned to me, your eyes hard and soft at the same time, just looking down at me. I waited for you to defend me, to say what you needed to, but you seemed to be having a hard time. You gripped my hand harder and turned back to Marie.

"Lena and I are together. That's all anyone needs to know. Marie, I don't know why you're here, but you can go back to where you came from. My mum has no clue what she was doing."

I tried to pull away from you again, but you held on fast.

"Let me go," I said through gritted teeth, and when you looked at me, your eyes were wide, your mouth open slightly.

Sure, you were defending me. My knight in shining armor. But why couldn't you call me your girlfriend? Why couldn't you tell Marie I wasn't just a fuck toy, that we were in love? God, were we even in love?

"Let me go," I said more forcefully, and you did. As soon as my arm slipped from your grasp, I ran. I didn't know if you were behind me, but it didn't matter. I ran straight for my room, shutting the door and locking it. I pulled my suitcase from the closet and started to throw my clothes in. I couldn't stay here, not for another second.

I heard voices down the hallway, an argument happening loud and heavy in the dining room. And then it seemed to die away, and I heard footsteps in the hall outside my room.

You knocked on the door. "Lena?" You tried the door handle. "Lena, I need to speak to you."

"Go away!" I shouted, shoving shit into my suitcase as fast as I could.

"No. No, I won't go away. Please, let me be with you."

I didn't respond to that one, and you went quiet on the other side of the door. I slammed my suitcase closed and put on my shoes, my flats instead of my heels so that I could get away quicker.

I jumped when someone knocked on my window. Outside, it was storming, and in the frame of my window, you stood outside, the water dripping down your face as you banged on the window, pleaded with me to let you come in.

I reached over and shoved the window up, watching as your wet form crawled through and then landed in a heap on my carpet. You stood, shaking out your clothes, and when you looked at me, you looked pitiful.

"What do you want, John?"

Your eyes were roving the room, looking at my suitcase by my feet, my heels left haphazardly in the center of the carpet. "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving. I can't stay here. Not in a house full of people who hate me."

Your eyes shot to mine. "Marie is gone. And my mum..."

"You wouldn't call me your girlfriend."

Your eyes went wide, shocked. "What does it matter what I call you? Girlfriend is just a word and besides, Marie didn't deserve to know what's gone on between us."

I realized then that I was crying, and I wiped the tears away, sniffing and coughing. "You won't even say you love me."

I couldn't look at you as I said it. I looked down at the carpet, where your wet shoes were making wet spots on the floor.

"Because you know I do." Your shoes took a step toward me, and I backed away immediately, looking up at you.

"Do I? You've never said it. How am I supposed to know if you don't say it?"

You took another step toward me. "Lena, I--"

"No!" I snatched my suitcase and moved toward the door. "Not now. It doesn't matter anymore. I'm leaving." I threw open the door and rushed down the hallway. By the front door, your mother stood with one hand on the knob, smirking as she opened the door so that I could plunge out into the rain.