A New Beginning

Chapter 28

I am now 26 weeks pregnant and I can't move.  Mardi Gras completely wore me out, but it was a much-needed distraction.  My doctor's appointment will be later today, and I will ask for another ultrasound.  I am very concerned that he has my due date wrong for me to be this big at this point.  I am always been irregular with my periods that's why I didn't realize I was pregnant before our fall out.  I am too big to be only 26 weeks even though it is with twins.  I was dropped off at the bar by Ruby so Ryder and I can go to our meeting together.  I have been begging Whiskey, and Hammer to please let me help at the bar so I have something thing to do.  

I have been sitting at the bar and Whiskey walks up behind me and places something right in front of me, and I am so taken back how sweet he has been lately and to top it off he got me some Mexican food with hot sauce.  Oh, these boys love Mexican, and I know I will be feeling them later that is for sure.  

"Thank you so much"

"Yeah Yeah I know you have not eaten yet and Blade asked me to run and get you some food."

"Can I ask you a question, and you be 100% honest with me"

"Yeah what is it?"

I take a deep breath and look at the food in front of me and look him in the eyes "I feel bad that Ryder is helping with everything that is going on.   I know he says he will treat the babies as if they are his, but how is that fair for him.  It is not his responsibility to take care of us, and I feel selfish to take away the chance he can meet someone else actually have blood-related children, and not someone who fell into this town.  I can not help but feel like I am just a burden to everyone here.  Y'all have been so good to me, and I am not worth all of this hospitality and welcomeness."

I finish my piece and look up at Whiskey and he looks dumbfounded with me confession. He takes the fork out of my hand and turns me to face him and holds my hand. 

"Hannah and yes I said Hannah so you can see what I am saying is the truth.  There is nothing in this world to make Blade do anything he does not want to do.  He has told me multiple times as well as Hammer how much he loves you and those boys.  They may not be blood, but that is not going to change the way he feels for you or them.  Again, this has been his choice from the very beginning he will not let you walk away.  Hell everyone who knows you or him knows those are yalls kids." 

"But what if he just wants to up and leave I can not handle that kind of rejection not again"

I make that statement and I feel two arms wrap around me and turn around and see Ryder.

"Sweet baby girl I am not going anywhere.  If it was up to me you would be my wife by now, but I know you need to get through everything first and get adjusted to motherhood.  I will not leave you or my boys.  You need to stop worrying yourself its not good for them or you.  Now finish lunch we have a baby doc appointment to get to, and I know what you are thinking and yes we will ask him to check to verify the due date of them.  I do agree with you I think they have everything incorrect not saying you're big, but you look full term with one kid. I love you, and I am not asking you I am telling you you will be my wife and soon."

He looks at me and rubs his thumbs to wipe my tears away, and nods to Whiskey to let him know that he has it from here. 

"Can I ask you a question hun."

"Anything sweetheart"

"Can your mom come with us, please it will make me feel like I have my mom with me"

"Of course let me call her, but we need to get going"

We head to our appointment and Mary said she would meet us there, in fact, I heard her yelling on the other end of the line thanking us for letting her come.