Thirteen-years-old, Connor Wolfhard, a considerate and magnanimous teen, trying to cope with the enslaved power of a merciless creature. With the abidance of detest, deep-rooted for his contentious mother, and intricate in an explosive concocted sto...
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C O N N O R
Two days.
It's been two days since my suicide attempt.
"How are you feeling, bro?" Cameron asked with a frown formed on his face and taking a step back.
I kept my eyes glued to the ground, threatening the tears to fall. If I would only glance at them, I know I would break down in tears.
After all, they're my friends. Since I've gotten a lot closer to them over the past few months, they knew something's wrong with me.
My life has been feeling chaotic and without direction, even when I take a breath, it seems to get forced out. I have so many feelings and thoughts inside my brain, they're constantly drumming it, making me frightened.
Guilt, shame and disappointment hasn't left me since that day. Shame has dug up my past and thrown it in my face, reminding me of all the times I have failed. Including now.
I'm just a failure.
I don't know what to do or what to say.
Dad has tried to talk to me but I found it so hard to talk about what has happened and I have no idea how to describe to anyone how I'm feeling. Even with my friends and Elliot, to talk about what led up to my suicide attempt.
I feel so unsure, worried and distressed about what to say all the time.
What now?
How can I be sure I will get back on track?
"Is there anything we can help you with?" Lucas asked.
Later, when I didn't answer, I could see Shelby walking forward and she gently touched my arm, truly signalling me that she's here for me.
"I don't know how you are feeling but I'm glad you're here and I'm ready to help you in any way I can."
I finally raised my head up to meet the watering eyes of Shelby. I just shot her a weak smile in response.
I heard Lucas clear his throat, signing me to look at the back. With a confused expression, I hesitantly turned around to meet the girl I didn't expect to see.
Those familiar electric blue eyes were staring at me that have always sent a spark to my heart.
I could see a thin layer of sweat covering the nape of her neck. Her eyes were filled with tears. It slightly shocked me because I had never seen a single tear in her eye.
Before I knew it, she stepped forward and pulled me closer to her, wrapping her arms around my fragile body and sniffling slightly. Her embrace was warm and I don't know where the calm feeling overcame me but her gentle arms gave me the space to breathe.
In the moment of feeling, I felt myself awake somehow, more alive than I have been in the amount of time. The arms that held me were soft, yet strong.
It felt as if when she's holding me, all my pain went away whether it's mental or physical.
The world around me started to melt away as I wrapped my arms slowly around her shoulder, not wanting the moment to end.
CONNOR
"I'm sorry for hurting you, I never wanted you to feel bad in any way. It was childish of me to do that, I should have talked to you at the time, but I got so shocked to find out about your cutting. I'm really sorry." Destiny said, empathizing with her words. "I didn't expect you to forgive me--"
"Don't apologize. It's not your fault. You told me to meet you after school and I was the one not to come to meet you. It's really okay." I could feel my palm grow sweaty again and I rubbed them against the grass without her noticing. "I didn't feel bad because of you." I admitted, shaking my head. "It was just.." I found it hard to manage the words to speak.
"Thank you."
I looked at her when she plastered a warm smile on her face, grabbing the gentle hold of my arm.
"If you need me, call me. I don't care if I'm sleeping or I'm angry at you. If you need me and if you need to talk to me, I'll always be there for you. No matter how big or how small your problem is."
Those words touched my heart, making me feel overwhelmed.
Her long, blonde hair was pulled into a high ponytail down her back and her eyes sparkled in disbelief when I shot her a smile. She squeezed my hand once more and I felt safe around her.
There was no need to think or feel about anyone else.
It was just me and her.
I felt her gaze settle on me, signalling me the hope and making me happier the way I am. I breathed out and I caught her staring at the nape of my neck.
I quickly tried to cover my scar when I felt her hand reach out to touch mine. She pulled it up, removing it from my nape and holding my hand in hers.
I felt my face flushed with embarrassment and I was so mortified to find out that she had found out about my scar.
"Don't be ashamed of your scars. They are reminders that you are a survivor. You are stronger than whatever tried to hurt you. They show you have fought your own battles."
She doesn't know anything about me yet, she is always there to make me feel better.
My scars show pain and suffering but they also show my will to survive. They're a part of my life and they'll always be there.
She rested her head on my shoulder. When my eyes meet her gaze as we're sitting there and staring at each other. Those blue eyes were piercing mine and I know, at this moment, she senses the real me. The one without the facade. ____
Hey guys!
It's a short chapter but I hope you enjoyed it.
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