Do Not Go Gentle

Stripping It Down

Dearest Readers,

Thanks for all of your comments, follows, favorites, etc. I've really enjoyed being able to get to know a few of you over the past year (so long, I know) and I can't wait to continue to get to know even more of you! I hope you are all safe!

Let me know what you think about this chapter!

Ally Layne.

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Telling my friends about my past was easier than I had originally thought. I was lucky that I had friends who had their own stories they also shared, and it became a large sharing session that I had a feeling we all needed.

Varis and I, especially.

Wearing the dress without sleeves felt like a step toward something greater. I just didn't really know what that something greater really was, but I was feeling optimistic.

Arwen had the kitchen bring food to us in my rooms, where we all spent the night eating, drinking wine, and sharing different pieces of our past with each other.

Varis hoped to one day go back to the settlement of dwarves. She wanted to go back to the mountains, but something was keeping her back from it. She didn't really share why she wasn't going to go back, but it seemed like it was a matter of her wanting to but not being able to for some reason.

Dwarves really were quite secretive, so I didn't think pushing her for answers would get anywhere.

I talked about my old friends from my homeworld, where I was raised as a young warrior that they determined was too young of an age to go on the wild quests I encountered. For me, it was a matter of life. But for them, it was something far more sinister than I ever could imagine.

Alma, bless her heart, was muttering curses under her breath while Varis was full out demanding retribution against the gods of my world. "They should not send children out to do their duties! It is childish! It is vile! Those kakhuf inbarathrag!"

Arwen coughed as one of her hands went flying up to hold to her mouth, hiding the blatant shock on her face. Alma snorted and seemed to pleasantly agree with whatever Varis said, but Gerda and I remained clueless.

"What did she call them?" I looked at Arwen curiously.

The elleth was sporting a faint blush upon her cheeks. "I do believe she referred to them as goat turds," Arwen spoke, amusement clawing at her voice. "Though it has been some years since I have heard the dwarrow language spoken."

"Damn right I called those so-called gods of yours goat turds!" Varis exclaimed, hopping down from her spot. Her hands were taut in fists at her sides. "Why I oughta show them..."

"Varis sit down," I told her, rolling my eyes. I have to admit, I was touched that she got this fired up over what she thought was abuse in my childhood. But I didn't really think this was necessary. "Those gods are in a completely different world, so you are wasting your breath."

The dwarrowdam scowled and sat back down with a huff. She muttered something underneath her breath that made Arwen purse her lips and look down at her pointedly.

"What Lord Glorfindel told you was right, Persie," Gerda spoke, bringing silence among us all once more. "What happened to your friends and parents was not your fault. One can only be forced to sustain so much for so long. You were the victim, not the aggressor."

The pain I felt from reliving those moments while telling my story started to fade but lingered under my breast like a shadowy specter. I knew what happened, the pain, the brutal and never-ending rape... the point of giving in and telling the monsters of my friends and their weaknesses... this was going to haunt me forever.