"Are you okay?" I snapped out of my thoughts and looked up to find Nate standing in front of my desk. I looked around and noticed the classroom had gone empty and only the teacher was sitting at his desk.
"Oh ya- I'm fine." I smiled and packed up my stuff. "The bell rang 5 minutes ago. You sure?" I nodded my head and tucked my hair behind my ear.
"Of course." A lie. My mind hasn't wrapped around the thought of everything. I'm upset. But I shouldn't be. I let them happen.
"Okay well, let's get going." I nodded my head and followed Nate out the door, waving bye to the teacher.
We walked out into the parking lot. People were standing at their cars and talking with their friends. But I saw them leaning against Graysons car, his hand wrapped around her waist as she leaned on his shoulder.
I wish I could say I'm happy for them. But that would be a huge lie.
"Y/N!" I was brought back to reality and turned to see Ethan walking towards us. I forced a smile as he ran up to us. "I was hoping that you can help my study? I'll give you a ride home." He smiled.
I turned to Nate who was my original ride, but he shrugged and nodded his head, handing me off to Ethan. "I'll see you tomorrow."
I nodded my head and waved off to Nate who walked off to get to his car. I turned my attention back to Ethan who had a smile.
"Let's go." I said as I walked passed him and to his car. He followed me and unlocked his car. I got in the passenger seat and threw my bag in the back seats.
He started the car and drove off. The only sound in the car was the radio playing and the muffled sounds of cars.
I didn't wanna talk. What was the point? This whole week everyone asked how I am and it was okay in the beginning, but once everyone knows and asks, it gets irritating.
I just want a normal conversation without anyone bringing up my well being. I don't wanna hear that they'll always be there for me because I know that, but what I want is to be normal again. I don't want my life to be about the girl who let her boyfriend be with her best friend.
The car stopped and I looked up. We were at the Dolans residence. I looked at Ethan confused as he had a nervous smile. "I need to grab something real quick. Don't worry."
He got out the car and ran into his house. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and started scrolling.
I looked up for a second to check if Ethan had come out. But as I was looking around, I saw Graysons car drive into the driveway and park.
Grayson walked out of the car first and ran to the other side. He opened the passenger door and Y/bsf/N came out. He grabbed her hand and closed they door. They both held hands and walked into the house.
They haven't talked to me since.
No one explained themselves. No one apologized. No one didn't even wait for me to move on.
I know I say that I don't want the attention.
But I want them to do something. They haven't done shit yet this whole thing is about them. They never even acknowledged me.
I shook my head out of the gutter and went back to scrolling. Maybe I need a sign. To tell me that I'll get better and move on or that everything will get better or they'll finally do something.
Until I saw a post.
Graysondolan
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Liked by ethandolan and 1.8 million others Graysondolan love of my life 😍 View comments Y/bsf/N forever baby ☺️ NateG wow 1 week ago
I turned off my phone and felt my eyes burn as they started to get blurry with tears.
They didn't even wait a day. They didn't think about me. The person who let them be together.
I heard the drivers door open and Ethan came in. I was looking down in shock as I made the biggest realization in my life.
They never cared about me.
I threw my phone on the ground and got out the car. I ran into the house, ignoring Ethan as I ran up the stairs to his room.
I opened his door to them cuddling on the bed. They pulled apart and sat up in bed, confused and afraid on why I barged in all of a sudden.
"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Y/bsf/n tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she looked at Grayson in fear. "You couldn't wait huh? You couldn't wait for me to get out the picture huh?"
"Y/N I-" I cut him off, "SHUT THE HELL UP GRAYSON. YOU DON'T GET A SAY." I screamed. They jumped back in shock at my sudden snap. "I GAVE YOU UP FOR MY BEST FRIEND. I GAVE YOU THE LOVE OF MY LIFE." I pointed at both of them.
"YET YOU DIDN'T DO SHIT. YOU MOVED ON WITHOUT CONSIDERING WHAT I WAS FEELING!" Their fear turned into guilt. "I ACTUALLY CARED ABOUT YOU GUYS. I ACTUALLY THOUGHT ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS. THAT'S WHY YOU GUYS ARE CUDDLING AND BEING WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW!"
Grayson got up from the bed and slowly walked towards me as if I was a murderer who was about to kill them. But when he got closer to me, I slapped him across the face. But he still stood on his feet with his hand holding the place I slapped him.
"AND YOU!" I shouted. "DON'T EVEN GO NEAR ME. I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU." I spat in his face as he just stood their calmly, but slightly angry. I turned to Y/bsf/N who sat in the bed afraid to say something.
I don't know who I was more mad at. They both were the most important people to me. I trusted them. I loved them. But they both hurt me.
But, I couldn't let them hold me back anymore. This anger wouldn't fix anything. And I knew if I stayed here any longer, things would get worse. I noticed the pain in their eyes. I felt guilty because it felt like I was ruining something that I wanted. And I had no reason.
"I'm done with this shit." I turned my heel and saw Ethan standing at the door frame. I pushed passed him as him and Grayson followed me down the stairs.
"What are you doing Y/N?!" Ethan shouted as I walked out the door. I turned and saw Ethan standing a couple feet away from me and Grayson behind him. Y/bsf/N stood at the door with tears in her eyes.
I realized that, in order to move on is to stop waiting for them to do something. I can't stay in one spot forever. I need to let go. Like I let go of them.
"I don't need this Ethan. I'm leaving." I turned my heel and started walking off. Ethan ran after me and stopped me by standing in front of me. "What do you mean leave??"
"I just need to get away from here. I'll be back when I feel like it." I turned back around and walked off back to my house.
I don't know when I'm coming back.
I don't know if I'm ever coming back.
But I do know that I can't be around this anymore.