Assorted Riverdale Imagines

Lost Toni Topaz 🌸

    You flash a smile to passing by students, hiding behind your vixen attire and loosely curled hair. You've known these guys for what felt like forever, yet it has only been a few years. You could name most of them by name without seeing their faces and only hearing their voice. You thought that it would be okay. That you would be okay, but it's gotten so hard to fake a smile. To fake happiness. It would be over soon, you would finish senior year. Finish everything you started and then you would fall into your own abyss of sad music and books. A part of you longed for someone to notice.
   That your hair was only curled from days before. That you bit your nails down too far. Your eyes were no longer full of light but dimmed as you stopped eating. Your clothes that sagged and barely touched your skin. You longed for someone to notice that you were falling apart. But no one did. And you realized long  ago that no one would care if you did. If you just disappeared into a mere memory that they would talk about at reunions and brunches. And if you were to let yourself go completely they would throw their fake tears on and mourn you in the halls but they would quickly pass.
    "Y/N," Kevin sang from behind you. "So glad I found you!" You turn facing your friend. "So we are throwing a little soirée in the wake of Honey's leaving, and we would love for you to join."
    "I'd love to Kev," you smile again. Liar. "When and where?" You won't make it there.
    "Cheryl's," he smiled. "Come around seven, we are gonna need all the help setting up." You bite your lip. "No, Y/N, we agreed you wouldn't let your crush on Toni get in the way! We agreed to have fun." He pouted. "Please, Cheryl promised she wasn't upset. She understands. Please, it will be no fun with out you."
    "Will do," you say. Lies. Lies. Lies. "See you then." He nods as you turn making it out of the school. Your own hell. Fake smiles and lies. A few more minutes and you would find that release. A few more minutes you could get to your house and the bottle that haunted your thoughts. Those tiny pills would hit your tongue and the euphoria would overwhelm you. Maybe you'd take an extra one today. Xanax would be your holy savior tonight. Your walk home seemed to take far longer than expected, but you made it putting four in your bag instead of three. You took one before dressing yourself up to look happy. Pulling a brush through your knotted hair. Putting mascara over your lashes and lipstick to cover your chapped lips. Your ride to Cheryl's would be quick but calculated. You did not want to be the death of anyone else but yourself. Before getting out you took one last look in your rear view mirror. Fake. Fake. Fake.
"Just in time," Cheryl smiled brightly. She was beautiful in every way and you knew that Toni chose her for a reason. "We need you to help with drinks. Try this." She shoved a drink your way. "Too much?" You sip lightly but shook your head. "Great. Add the ice."
"Where is Toni?" You ask following her inside. Her shoulders tensed but she quickly let it go.
"She is not here right now. She went to gather the rest of your friends," Cheryl said. "I believe Sweet Pea will even be here tonight." You nod. "Great well you know where things are." She walked away before you could say anything else. You found the ice in a chest freezer and began doing your work. You finished off the drink and poured another.
"Slow down, there's barely anyone here," a familiar voice chuckled deeply behind you. "You look different. Something with your hair?"
"No," you turn switching your smile on. "But I could say the same about you. Did someone donate their bones to add your height? Be honest you can tell me, do you wear heels?"
He laughed, "you'd like to see that wouldn't you?"
"I think all of us would," you shrug. "Where have you been? I haven't heard from you in weeks!"
"I got busy," he shrugged. "What about you? You've lost weight."
"I don't know if that's a compliment or not," you say trying to keep your tone even. "Stress, it's almost the end of the school year." Lies.
"Right," he stared a moment too long and you felt like shrinking into a ball. "Well, we can drink that away for the night. Right? I need someone who can keep up though, is that you?" You notice Toni in the doorway.
"You're on."
Useless.
Seven drinks later you felt the room slow to almost a stop. You were faking laughs in your group of friends. Listening to their stories and jokes. You didn't speak you stood behind Toni and Fangs as they joked with Sweet Pea about his absence. You needed to sit but you ignored it as much as you could. Trying to concentrate on their voices, trying to pinpoint one to fully listen to. And you did. You listened to Toni's beautiful voice sing in your ears. Holding you to your spot.
"When do you leave again?" Toni asked. "Only asking because we want to get a place with higher ceilings if you're gonna stay." She laughs. "Honestly surprised you even fit in here." Sweet Pea mocks making her roll her eyes. "I've missed you, Pea."
    "I'm gonna go to the bathroom," you say pushing yourself down the hall. Just take them all. No one would even care that I was gone. They don't even notice that something is wrong with me. Your thoughts rang loudly in your head as you shove the bathroom door shut. You dug through your bag looking for the pills throwing everything on the counter. You took two from the baggie and took a long sip of your drink. It burned the whole way down but you didn't mind. You sat in the bathroom for a few moments letting the cool air hit your skin.
    "Is someone in here?" A knock made you jump.
    "One sec," you say trying to push all of your stuff back in your bag then out of the door. "Sorry."
    You stumble through the long hall trying not to run into anyone as your feet trip over each other. It hit you quickly, you realize as you make it to the main room. The room was spinning and you barely made it to the couch before falling. You laugh at yourself and don't notice the staring. You lay on the couch trying to get the room to slow down. Your thoughts moving just as fast. Tears streamed down your face unknowingly and you take another drink. Your hand jerked making it spill on you, but you didn't care. You didn't care about anything in that moment. Not that it felt like your air was being slowly pulled out of and not returning. Not that your chest heaved for air. Or that your vision seemed to darken. Nothing mattered in that moment. It was like your own spinning hell.
    "Y/N?" Fangs came up to you. "Are you crying? What's wrong?"
    "Everything is," you sigh closing your eyes. "I'm gonna die and no one knows it." He frowned at you but you let darkness surround you. "The quote about Death. It's true. It doesn't discriminate, but it does lure in you with its lullabies."
    "Y/N, what the hell are you talking about? Why are you dying?" He asked but you didn't answer. Y/N?" He shook you lightly, nothing. People stopped all around the two of you. Fangs shook your unconscious body trying to get anything from you. Nothing you were like a rag doll in his arms. Panic surrounded him as he tried to figure out what was wrong with you.
    "Fangs?" Toni and Sweet Pea shoved through the circled crowd. "What the hell is going on? Y/N? Did she drink too much? Is she on anything?" He shook his head not knowing any of the answers. "Get her on her side and someone call for help." She grabbed your bag looking through your things. "There's nothing really in here."
     "She left a lot of her stuff in the bathroom," someone said. "I'll grab it. There was a bag of pills."
    "Someone get a cold cloth," Toni's voice was shrill. "Sweet Pea help me get her to the car. Fangs grab her bag and make sure to get those pills." They did as they were told and people moved out of their way. "Y/N, you are gonna have to wake up. We are gonna get you help, okay? Just don't stop breathing, Ducky." Your nickname from your childhood.
    "Toni," Sweet Pea was seeping with anxiety. "I think her breathing is getting slower. Like if that's even possible."
    "Guys," Fangs bolted towards the car. "It's Xanax. She took Xanax."
     "What? How many?" Toni asked taking the bag. "What the hell? Just get in the car we have to go."
    "What do we do? What are we gonna do? She's gonna die!" Sweet Pea was wheezing with you. "This is why I left this hell hole! Everybody gets tainted. It ruins you. Look at Y/N! She used to be happy! Right? Like she wasn't always trying to overdose on pills and alcohol?"
    They looked at him, "no Sweet Pea she wasn't. You need to calm down. This is not helping right now!"
    "You all should have just came with me," he shook his head. "We wouldn't be here if you did."
     "I would kick him out if I could," Toni sighed. "I would get rid of him if I could."
     "Dude just keep her breathing," Fangs said. "Please focus on that. I can't deal with your freak out. If you freak out then I am going to start. Please."
     "This isn't something that we should be calm about! We are eighteen! We shouldn't be dealing with dead bodies and our friends bodies. Jughead just faked his death! Now this?" Sweet Pea continued to spiral the entire way to the hospital. "How could we not know?"
    "Pea, you weren't here. It's not your fault. It's mine," Fangs sighed. "I'm with her everyday. I didn't notice anything. Maybe I've been too preoccupied with Kevin and the business."
     "Guys," Toni sighed. "Stop please. I can't fucking drive with you guys saying all of this. I need to focus on that. Please." The hospital lights were now in sight and this was the last stretch. Getting you into the hospital was the easy part. Waiting was hard. You barely had a pulse when Sweet Pea set you down on the gurney. Doctors and Nurses ushered the others way as they moved you and began working.
    "You guys got her here just in time," the doctor explained. "Any longer there could be permanent damage to her liver and kidneys. As well as some brain damage. She is very lucky tonight. By the looks of some of the tests we have done. It seems that she's been doing this for a while. Do you know know if the medication she's been taking was prescribed?"
    "No, she doesn't go to the doctor. The pills were in a baggy," Toni said.
    "Alright. Well, she will be asleep for a while. You should make yourselves comfortable. We still have a lot of work to do," he explained. "If you have any questions let me know."
    "How did we not know? That she was going through this?" Sweet Pea asked. "She told me that she was talking about her dying and it luring her in."
   "Depression isn't always noticeable. Anything could have set her in this episode, but she could have hid it very well. It's best not to blame yourself. Sometimes people show no symptoms or very few that it can be passed as something else. We will do a psych evaluation when she wakes up, she is admitted as one as well. Which means that she will have special precautions. She will be able to leave in 3 days after we can know for sure that she isn't going to try to overdose again."
    "Okay. Thank you," Fangs bit his lip. "Do you think this has anything to do with Cheryl? She was terrified that Cheryl was going to make her life hell after she found out about Y/N's crush on you?" He looked at Toni. "Could she of done anything?"
    "No," Toni shook her head. "Cheryl told me that she didn't trust Y/N alone with me but she said that she never did anything because she understood. Crushes happen all the time. They go away as fast as they come." She bit her thumb nail. "Cheryl would never."
    "Well we need to figure this out," Sweet Pea said.