Early in the morning I sat beside jack on the beach sand. We sat in only our shorts and no other clothes letting the water touch our toes and retreat back to the ocean. "So what's on your bucket list? I remember August mentioning it to me once." I asked filling our silence.
Zach ignored my question putting another watermelon slice in his mouth and looking down at his bowl. He chewed quietly and leaned closer into me, he rested his head against my shoulder. "What make you the most unhappy?" Zach questioned in butchered English setting aside his bowl of fruit. "Loss I guess."
"What makes you so-" I was cut off by Zach pressing his lips against mine again, he had gotten more comfortable kissing me since the first time. He didn't tense like before but he also never asked assuming he was confident to know how I was feeling as well. With each kiss I felt as if I wanted more than to move our lips agaisnst eachother I wanted to feel more but he would always pull away first leaving me breathless. "I like your lips." He whispered against my lips and I breathed in trying to gather courage to lean in myself.
I moved forward pulling his face towards mine and pushing us back together. He gasped and I took my chances by deepening the kiss myself. I bit lightly on his plump bottom lip causing him to squeal. Zach pushed me away quickly shaking his head "don't bite me you crazy!" He chuckled showing his contagious smile. I looked down at the boys neck with a smile, his bruise was slowly healing with time and I enjoyed the sight of it. "Promise to still kiss me when we get home?" He asked nudging my arm, I suddenly felt frozen.
Home.
'How could I forget about August?! I'm a terrible human being!' I ran my hand through my hair shaking me head looking back to the French boy. "We cant keep kissing zach. You're with August, don't you love him?" It wasn't something to be lost in translation, either in France or America relationships were all the same. You didn't kiss or hold someone who wasn't your partner, cheating was still cheating from place to place. "I don't care about auggy..annoying." He sighed aloud an annoyed look on his face, I frowned slightly at the boy. "You don't mean that.." I said quietly.
"Why not you just kiss me and not ask question?" Zach snapped suddenly in a harsh voice. I never witnessed Zach being angry at me and felt taken back by the small incident. "Because zach we are friends!" I yelled back in a moment of frustration, I hadn't meant to scream at the poor boy who barley understood what I had said but I meant what I had been feeling from my heart. The truth was in the moment I was staring to feel what I felt from the moment I first laid eyes on him.
That's why I couldn't countine this, because I didn't just like Zach I realized I was falling in love with zach. "I think I'm falling in love with you idiot." I muttered out followed by silence shared between the two of us. This was why I couldn't find myself excited to have daniel falling for me again. as everything was making sense to me the only expression Zach gave off was a confused one. At the worst of times zach didn't understand English.
"What does..um 'love' mean?" The boy spoke butchering the few words he spoke. His face was bright pink and he twiddled his thumbs in his lap, the poor cherri french boy was nervous and it was evident by his pink tinted face.
"You wouldn't want to know." I replied. In all honesty I felt defeated when the boy couldn't even understand a word as simple and complicated as love. I couldn't even fathom a relationship with someone who didn't speak my language because we would lack communication, communication was important. I come to realize in that moment this was why people should never follow their hearts.
Because my heart was screaming to translate the simple word but my brain told me the logical truth and consequences behind explaining what I meant. "How could I be so stupid to fall for you? I'm such an idiot and this never should've happened. You and I both know this shouldn't happened." I complained more to myself running a hand through my hair. "Slow slow. I no understand when you quick.." Zach tries but I was fed up, more so at myself and my selfish actions lately.
I stood up grabbing my phone and turning away from the boy and finding my way back to the small cabin. I huffed our annoyed as my feet hit against small rocks and twigs through the sand. Suddenly I stopped in my tracks when I felt Zach's hand against my wrist. I turned my head back to the boy who's eyebrows were furrowed and he seemned distressed or maybe just confused. I knew in my heart neither of us wanted this to end because the moment I left I knew I was throwing away anything we had or could've had.
I tried pulling away my wrist from the boy but he only held on tighter not letting go. "Hear me no go." Zach breathed out a shaky breath and I nodded. Hearing him out was the least I could do before I ended things for good, for the sake of the two of us things must end. "I like you like friend but best? You more to me since me first see you.."
'Did he mean best friend?'
"I have August but I want you to be amoureux. We friends but I feel l'amour?"
I didn't understand as our biggest problem surfaced again, communication. Though whatever he said wouldn't have changed a thing if I could understand it because I knew in my heart zach didn't understand the word love and he didn't know I felt it for him. I turned swiftly pushing his arm away from mine and walked away ending things without a goodbye.
As I went inside slamming the door to our shared room I couldn't help but feel my breath coming uneasy and drops of water hitting my toes. I was crying like a child
and it was all because the poor french boy. ___________________________ 1092 words
short but important
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
