Fearless

8

Colby's POV

"Dude wake up!" Sam's voice called as someone shook me, "what's happening?!" I bolted up as my heart raced. "You were having another nightmare dude." I didn't realize how hard I was breathing, "god DAMNIT. This is torture." I groaned. We had been here for two days now. The roommates would take turns coming to sit with me, they tried to convince me that I needed to just come home and try to sleep in a bed, then maybe the nightmares would stop.

It was always the same nightmare, the guys and I were driving back to the house, and we would see the crash only this time Cora was dead, she couldn't be saved. I just had to watch in horror as they zipped the body bag.  The thought alone was enough to send a shiver down my spine.

The nurse who I have gotten to know as Meghan came out into the waiting room, breaking me from my thoughts, "how is she?" I said bolting up, "she's doing good, she's still in a lot of pain but the risks go down every minute she's not seizing. She's staying strong." I nodded and smiled slightly. That's my girl. "When can I see her?" I asked hopefully.

"Maybe tonight. We just don't want her getting too emotional when she sees you. Keep being patient. I'll keep you updated if anything changes." I nodded as she walked away. I let out a sigh, "you okay dude? I know this has been really hard on you." I nodded, "I just want to see her man, I feel so helpless just sitting out here. She's in so much pain and I'm just sitting here looking stupid. I can't sleep or eat, I just sit here. I'm useless." I mumbled and sat back in my chair. I pulled my phone out and texted Cora's dad, giving him the update. "You're not useless, Colby. I know this hard for you but the fact that you're here supporting her and not at home with the rest of us is amazing. You don't have to be sitting here but you are. It's not your fault you saw something traumatic which is triggering nightmares. And I'm gonna go and get some food for you, you have to eat. It's not an option anymore." He said and got up.

I appreciated Sam so much right now, he really was the rock I needed in this situation. I nodded as he walked out of the room.

My phone rang and I looked down to see who it was, "hey Jake." I said quietly and rubbed my eyes, "hey bro, how's it going there?" He asked and I sat back in my chair, leaning my head against the wall, "she's stable but I still can't see her." He sighed, "I'm sorry bro, I know that must be killing you." He said and I nodded, "yeah. More than you know." I admitted, "is Sam still with you?" He asked, "he went to go get us some food, he's officially gonna shove it down my throat I think." I said and he was silent for a moment,

"we are really worried about you brother." He admitted and I clenched my jaw, fighting the emotions that were coming to the surface, "don't worry about me brother, I'm fine." I said shakily, "no. No you're not, you're falling apart and we are all worried. Cora would be worried if she saw you like this dude! You're beating yourself up so bad that you can't even tell me the last time you ate something. You need to take care of yourself man." I sighed, "I know dude, I just....I feel so guilty. I should have been there for the doctors appointment, I should have been driving. Maybe if I was driving this wouldn't have happened. We would have been fine. She wouldn't be fighting for her life alone right now." I was fully sobbing at this point.

"It's not your fault dude, sometimes things happen. She's fine at the moment, yeah she's in pain but she's alive and that's all we could ask for right now." I rubbed my eyes again. "I know, I'll feel better when I can be there for her," I sighed, "I know, just keep your head up. You both are gonna get through this." I nodded, "thanks brother."

"Sam should be back soon, I'm gonna try and close my eyes again for a little bit." I said with a sigh, "okay brother, let us know what's going on." I nodded, "will do."

I leaned my head back against the wall and closed my eyes. I don't know how long I sat there but I was being shaken awake, "Colby," Meghan said gently, "w-what's happening?" I said drowsily and lifted my head up, "you wanna come see her?" She said quietly. I sprung up coming back to my senses, "yes! Oh my god yes!" I said and looked over to see Sam sleeping in the chair. "Let me tell him real quick though." I said to Meghan and shook Sam awake, "what's going on?" He said sleepily, "I'm going back to see Cora." I said and he smiled, "okay, tell her I said hi" he said then leaned his head back again.

The walk to her room felt like the longest walk ever, "alright, she's in here but if she starts to show any signs of freaking out you have to leave." I nodded. "Okay." I said then opened the door. She was in the bed attached to a bunch of machines, the bruises and cuts on her face were a little lighter than the last time I saw her. "Hey baby girl." I said quietly and walked up to her, "Colby," she whispered and reached her hand out to me. I grabbed it and leaned down to my lips on her forehead. "It's me baby, it's me. How are you feeling?" I asked and sat in the chair next to her, "better now that you're here." She said quietly causing me to smile, "you're really tough, you know that right?" I said and brushed the hair from her face, "I almost died." She mumbled.

I shook my head, "but you didn't, you and that little girl held on. I'm so happy that you did." I said and kissed the hand I was holding. "I heard you pretty much didn't go home, why didn't you?" She said and pouted a little, "I couldn't leave you baby, I couldn't be home with everyone without you, I couldn't sleep in our bed without you. Cora...knowing you were scared and alone killed me. I wanted to fight everyone in my way to come back to you. Now that I'm here I'm not leaving your side. I'm never leaving you." Her eyes glazed with tears as I placed a hand on her cheek, "I love you so much." She whispered and leaned into my hand. "I love you more." I said softly.

Eventually her eyes started to get heavy, "go to sleep baby, I'll be here when you wake up." I said quietly and kissed her forehead again. She nodded, "I love you." She whispered, "I love you too baby girl." I said and held her hand again. She fell asleep quickly but I just watched her, I took in her features. Even with cuts and bruises all over her face she was still the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

I had to make her mine forever.