𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐲 || 𝐉𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫

Ch.23

I was staring at the ceiling for the past hour. I wasn't listening to music, I was just staring at the ceiling. It had been a month now since Elijah passed away and I still didn't want to believe that he killed himself at the bridge. "Sebastian?" He was laying on the ground staring at the ceiling too. 

"Yeah?" 

"Do you think he really did it? I know Elijah, he wouldn't."

"We all didn't know him well enough then." It went quiet and we continued to stare at the ceiling. 

The group was down to four of us in Florida and Caleb, who I met at the funeral, in Hawaii. We all haven't hung out since the funeral; Jackson doesn't answer his phone and Jake texted a couple of times, but I haven't texted anyone back but my mom. We were already late for school, but we didn't want to get up and it had been that way for the past month. 

"Let's go (y/n), we can't stay here forever, and our attendance is bad already. Our grades are slipping, Elijah wouldn't want us to be sad forever. 

"I miss him so much though." 

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I sat down at the back of the library and tried to focus on the books in front of me. "You're fine (y/n). Just calm down." I had to say it repeatedly because I would start crying out of nowhere during school. I looked at the book and a tear streamed down my face. "You okay?"

I looked up and saw Troy sit next to me, "I'm fine." I got up from where I was and started to walk away but he pulled my arm back. 

"You need to talk to someone about how you feel. I mean I'm here for you, you can talk to me." He put his hand on my shoulder and I took it off, he made a confused face at me and brushed his hair back. 

"I don't want to talk to you."

"Why?"

I looked into his eyes and remembered the day we spent together, that day I could've hung out with Elijah for the last time. I could've hugged him for last time. For the last time I could've beat him in Fortnite. I was hesitant to what I was going to say next, but I thought it was the best, "We shouldn't be friends anymore."

"Because of Elijah's death?" I hated to hear "Elijah" and "death" in the same sentence. 

"I need space and you don't help. Let's forget we knew each other." I walked past him and didn't look back, I started to walk towards the restroom when I saw Jaimie walk out with her friends. As I passed by them, I heard a bunch or whispers until she spoke up herself. 

"Just because your friend killed himself doesn't mean you have to look so disgusting at school. Oh wait, you looked like that before. Maybe she should just die with him." Her and her friends laughed and started to walk away when I turned around and shouted her name.

"JAIMIE!" 

She looked at me with a confused face. I started to walk up to her and when I got close enough to her, I punched her in the face with all my might. She fell to the ground and I kept hitting her. I was taking all the anger I had out on her. She was already bleeding and cut up pretty bad, but I couldn't stop. Everything I was holding onto was coming out and now she was getting her ass beat. She was screaming the entire time and when I was about to punch her again, I felt hands wrap around me and I tried to fight back. I looked around and saw a crowd of people around us, the boys were behind me and Sebastian was holding onto me. There were no teachers around that area and no cameras so that meant we wouldn't get into trouble.

"You need to stop or you're going to get expelled." Sebastian whispered to me. 

"YOU'RE GONNA END UP DEAD YOU BITCH! JUST LIKE ELIJAH!" I tried to lunge at her again, but the boys pulled me back and she flinched back. With the way she looked right now I would've just shut my mouth if I was her. 

I looked at Sebastian and Jackson, they were both serious, but didn't say anything. I started to walk away when Sebastian yelled at me, "WHAT THE HELL (Y/N)!" I didn't get why he was mad at me. I was defending myself and Elijah. 

"I did what I had to do Sebastian. I don't get why you're mad at me, I didn't do anything wrong!" My eyes swelled up with tears, but I didn't want to cry in front of him. Jackson and Jake caught up to where we were and stood next to Sebastian. 

"Hey (y/n), you good?" Jake walked up to me and started to touch the cut I had on my cheek, but I pushed away his hand. 

"No, I'm not fine! None of us are, but we have to act strong for Elijah, right?" I looked over at Sebastian, "Because I guess I can't be sad that my best friend died just a month ago and we all have to act like we are good just because Elijah would've wanted it that way. I'm so tired of having to suck it up. You guys can go ahead and act like it didn't matter. But Elijah was everything in my life and I owe him everything. I'm not going to let him just die and be forgotten. He died just like my brother and I wish I could take it back." No one said anything and we all just stared at each other. "I'll see you guys whenever, but I need space." 

"C'mon (y/n). We promised each other that we would live life together, you can't give up so easily." Sebastian said while he wiped away the tears that were in his eyes. 

"Elijah already broke the promise. Now we live our lives, like I never met any of you. So, you can go back to being how you all were, but I can't act like everything is just going to go back to normal. I'm not happy and I haven't been, I need to find my happiness." I walked out the school without seeing if they were going to say anything else. I didn't want to be at school and see their faces. Everything was ruined and now I don't know what to do.

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"Are you doing okay?" I was on a call with my mom. I didn't want to tell her about Elijah because she would've gotten scared, I would be doing the same thing.

"I'm good Mom, but I'll let you go. I need to study, love you." I hung up the phone and laid back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I needed a distraction and the only place I could think of was the arcade I used to go with my brother. I got up and changed into some comfy clothes. I drove to the arcade and went to go exchange my money for coins. I started to look around for a good game and when I saw Pac Man, I thought of the millions of times Elijah and I tried to break the record. I walked over and put the coin in. Once I started to play, zoned out. I couldn't distract myself at all because I kept thinking of him. I felt a couple tears come down my face but cleaned them quickly.

I walked away and even though I had just gotten there, I decided to leave. 

I sat on the concrete sidewalk and stared at the sunset that was going on. I was there for a couple hours until the guy closing the arcade told me that it was closing. 

I stayed there for a little bit and saw the employee sit next to me, he was young and looked like my age, "You know, I don't think when you come to the arcade you're supposed to cry." He laughed a little and I did too. 

"Sorry, I'm just going through a lot." I stared back at the streetlight and noticed he was still staring at me. "Yes?"

"Nothing." He got up and held out his hand, "I think you should go home and enjoy yourself."

I got up and smiled, "Yea, I should. Thanks."

"Come back again, maybe we can talk some more than just me kicking you out." I laughed and then nodded my head.

"Yea maybe."

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Hey guyssssssss! I have a big favor. Can you guys put down who you would want for the Arcade employee? He's pretty important for the story but I want you guys to choose :)

Thanks.