The Mafia's Son [REVISED]

26. Mommy Dearest

"Mom?"

The woman standing in front of me resembled my mother, but that would be impossible because my mother is dead.

My mother is dead.

My mother is dead. The voice echoed in my head like a ping pong.

How can she be standing in front of me if she's gone?

I attempt to stand up, but my knees go weak. I grasp onto the chair and Percy supports my weight as I stand up straight to look at the person face to face.

I reach out to touch her cheek, but she takes a step back, dodging my hand. I need to touch her to know she's real. I need to touch her so I know I'm not hallucinating, because I've seen her in my dreams before and all those times it felt so real.

However in those dreams, I couldn't touch her because I knew deep down she wasn't real and that it was a dream.

I attempt again to reach out to touch her arm and this time she wasn't fast enough to dodge my hands. My grasp on her is strong as if I was too scared that she would leave again if I didn't hold her as tight as I was.

I touched her. Now what?

I never made it this far in the dream because the moment I tried to touch her, I would wake up in tears and shivers.

After holding her tight for what seemed like a few minutes, I finally let her go and take a step back to look at Percy and Gabriel to see the expressions on their faces.

I push them all back and run to grab a bucket I was eyeing earlier to throw up in it.

I guess you can say my stomach didn't handle that quite well...

I wipe my mouth and walk aimlessly back to them. I felt like a zombie, barely alive and breathing. I was dead weight and there was nothing going on in my head because if I took a stop to breathe or think then I will have to face the truth or reality or whatever this crap was.

I close my eyes and took in a deep breath. I shake off my nerves and whatever I was feeling. I tried to stay calm my body, especially my brain and heart.

This isn't real, even if I just touched her.

She isn't real, because if she was real then...

She isn't real, okay! That's it! I can't think what will happen if I start to believe she is real. I can't go through this again, to accept her and then realize she's gone...again! I can't do it.

I close my eyes and took in another deep breath. I try to keep down another barf I feel coming my way. I'm really wishing I ate that salad now, because this pasta is not coming up pretty.

As I continued to close my eyes and push away the reality, I hear scrapes and hushes in the room. However, no one else was here but that imposter and these two hooligans who thought it would be fun to prank me.

"I think you should sit down for this, snowflake. We have a lot to catch up on," She places a hand on my shoulder and tries to get me to sit down, but I shove her hand off and throw a look of disgust her direction.

I point at her and step away, "NO! You can't call me that. My mom and father and boyfriend call me that, but you aren't my mother. SO YOU DON'T GET TO CALL ME THAT! understand?"

I sigh and sit back down on the chair with an angry expression. Some joke this was. I bet Percy and Gabriel were having a kick out of this.

I felt numb. I still can't tell if this was real or not.

I shake my head after I sat down on the chair, "You're not real. You're not my mother. I saw her die in front of me. I saw her get shot. I went to her funeral and I've been grieving her death for three years. You can't be real. Whatever you say in the next few minutes will not convince me you're real."