Neon Lights

Chapter 28 - Lost In You

•Castiel's POV•

He sat beside me, staring at the sunset. I went rigid, refusing to look at him, "What do you want?"

"I want to kiss you," Dean said softly. I felt choked. I want that too...but no.

"Which head?" I scoffed.

Dean's green eyes looked auburn in the warm orange-red sunlight, "Everywhere. But mostly here." He tapped my lips. I turned my head swiftly with a loud exhale through my nose. No...

"I won't be your sex slave anymore, Dean. I won't," I stared him dead in the eyes, watching his face contort to horror and confusion.

"Castiel Novak, you are not my sex slave," he promised, making me chuckle in disbelief. "Then what am I? Huh?"

"You are so much more than that," he said with a sincerity in his voice I couldn't ignore. I stared at him. "I mean..." He continued slowly, "You're the one I want to spend my life with, do everything with, and the one I hope to die with. I-I didn't know how to tell you this, and I still don't...but I'll start by saying you are the cutest, smartest, most wonderful person I've ever met and had the good fortune of knowing..."

I swallowed hard. This isn't a joke or a white lie...he means this.

"...You mean everything to me, and I, Dean Winchester, am helplessly, embarrassingly, hopelessly in love with you."

My lips parted and I blinked slowly. Where is this coming from? This is all so fast. Why here? Why now?

Why did he wait so long?

He was staring at me, waiting for a reply. I felt him tense up in fear when I turned my head away.

Tears welled in my eyes. "Cas...?" He tried. He's desperate - if Dean said something like that, he must be. He can't see my face. He thinks I'm rejecting him.

I turned back to him as the first tear ran down my cheek, "I'm so sorry Dean...I'm so sorry I ever doubted you...I'm such a jerk...!"

To think what he must have gone through! All this time he really did feel something for me, he just had no idea how to show it. He didn't even know he had to!

He hugged me, and I felt a drop of water land in my hair. Is he crying too? "I'm sorry I left you alone, I'm sorry I'm no good...can you teach me?" He asked. I looked at him.

"Teach you what?"

Dean gulped, pulling back to look at me through wet, glassy eyes, "Teach me how to relationship."

I nodded, "I will, but I don't know much either. We can learn off each other. Capiche?"

"Capiche," he took me by surprise, tipping my head up and kissing me softly. Softly. Not filled with lust or hunger or thirst like it usually is - this one just said I missed you, I need you, and best of all, I love you.

We pulled away with an awkward laugh when we heard chattering from up the street. He shuffled an inch away from me so we weren't sitting too close.

"Hey Cas...who's this?" Matilda asked. Everyone went silent. The waves crashing angrily at the shore was distracting as Hell.

"Dean," I said, "Remember?"

"Right, the one you cheer for in baseball!" Matilda sat in front of him, "I've heard so much about you! I'm Matilda Tonkins, but my friends call me Tilly!"

Dean cast her a crooked smile, "Right, you're Kev's girlfriend."

"I'm Faith, and this is Robin!" Faith chimed gleefully, and Robin waved.